Hello All

I am not a constant poster but am in need of some help.

I basically am not very confident with the NHS at the moment, I feel as though it's their way or the high way during the birth. Even the ante natal classes in my area are only for the women, the men go off on a seperate Dad's course!! to me that doesn't sound or feel right.

Anyway, back to my question, I have made an appointment with a private doctor to discuss (only discuss at this stage) the option of going private, however, I have been told I need my GP's referral. My question is, is there anyway that my GP can deny me a referral given that I would be self funding the private care?

I really am starting to feel boxed into a corner & like I have no options of my own

Many Thanks for any advice offered x

No-one can stop you going private if you so wish as it's personal choice and your money. Your GP may advise against it but it's your decision. I went private for a consultant appointment a few years back when I thought the NHS weren't acting quick enough and all I had to do was get a referral from my GP.

In total agreement with LoobyLou, your GP has no reason not to refer you, though they will enquire as to your reasons why because they have to note it down for their paperwork.

My antenatal classes are also only for women however the reason for that is because there isn't enough room for men to come too! I know its a shoddy reason but kind of makes sense.

You have to do whatever makes you feel more secure throughout your pregnancy, though please don't feel alone in not feeling 100% confident I would think most ladies on here at one point or another have felt unsure.

xxx

be aware that if you seek private care the nhs will be quick to cut all ties leaving you paying fro private care until you give birth

we looked in to private but where we are you still give birth (unless a home birth) in the nhs hospitals! it also worked out at nrly ten thousand pounds! which is fine if we then had use of a private maternity hospiatl but we didnt!

have you thought about going on nct anti natal classes? then your oh can go! thats what we did!

Your GP will refer you. I was referred for a private smear by my GP - the hospital I went to required that.

A lot of GPs seem to use private healthcare themselves. I see no issue with it personally.

Not putting anyone off the nhs i am sure they are normally great but in my case the weekend i gave birth they were busy and actually closed to new cases sending them elsware. Why the hell did they induce me there then??
I spent an agonising night in labour on my own on the ward with my oh not being allowed to stay at night, and then loads of mistakes made. Change of midwifes 10 min before birth when they left the room to discus change over and left me with a student. My oh had to shout that i was having baby and then remind mw that there was meant to be a pediatrition and ob present. Suction machine was not checked and didnt work meaning short delay in clearing lo's airway (felt like days) causing 4 days of iv antibiotics for lo. They forgot to give me anti D jab or take cord blood from baby, thank god little one was r- when they checked later (this involved unesesary blood test that should have come from the cord blood), cleaned lo up before passing to me which i had not wanted. gona stop before i get stressed.
anyway it made me realise that serious problems can arise due to the nhs care so i am saving for private care next time. either that or not fall pregnant on valentines night lol

Just wanted to share my experience with you. I too felt very let down by my local NHS services when I was pregnant with DD. Among other things, they lost my blood tests, wouldn't let me see a consultant despite having severe hyperemesis and found there was little continuity between staff and my appts. so felt like I saw someone different every time.

All in all I lost confidence and ended up going private. I did alot of research and found a fantastic obstetrician and had the most wonderful experience in a private suite in a London hospital. I opted for an elective C-section discussed everything at length with my Ob and anaesthetist beforehand and the aftercare I received was second to none.

Of course it was expensive but in my opinion it was money well spent. I didn't mention going private to anyone until just before the birth as you never know how NHS GPs or MWs may react. I certainly didn't need a referral from my GP just went direct.

It is a very personal decision and I'm not saying that the NHS don't do a fantastic job given their resources and budget constraints. It was just unfortunate that my experience wasn't the best.

Good luck with whatever you decide.

Thankyou all for your replies.

sootired & mojo401 you have highlighted issues that I worry about, what seems like constantly at the moment. Also, my frame of reference is not good, the women in my family don't tend to have 'good' birth experiences & both of my close friends have been very let down by the NHS, both resulting in emergency c-sections.

I guess it's only natural to worry but it's all I seem to do at the moment & I don't want to feel boxed in by my GP, surely it should be my choice? it just doesn't feel like it at the moment.

Thanks again

i was told you cant have private health maternity care unless you pay for it!! maybe its dif in your area! it is completly up to you but the way you prepare your self for the brith counts alot to!

just because others ahve had c sections doesnt mean you will! its natural to worry and def ask your gp for advice but also look in to national childbirth trust hypno birthing ect akk will help you have a better birth experince!

the looseing blood tests ect that happens in private hospitals remember the docs you have private are the same as on nhs and if your delivering in a private hospital make sure they have speacil care baby unit as if not you will be transferred to nhs hospital and they can be funny about beds ect! its all things to look in to and think about!