Hi everyone, I am brand new, have specifically joined to garner an opinion about what I should do! I am very very confused with how to bring my baby number two into the world.

I have a 3 and a half year old daughter, who arrived in a very dramatic fashion. I had a healthy and active pregnancy, and was only 23, however things didnt start happening until I hit 42 weeks. I had a sweep and later that day got a 'show'. That night contractions started, I tried to get some sleep but kept waking up for each contraction, which were about 10mins apart. This continued for THREE DAYS. during this time, I felt very naucous, wanting to throw up and have contractions are my worst possible nightmare. During these three days i did not sleep. My midwife insisted I try, but the contractions would wake me up before I could get to sleep. I was not really dialating, and the contractions were fairly far apart. This meant I stayed at home with my boyfriend and mother taking turns holding my hands and rubbing my back. Finally utter exhaustion began to set in and i became very emotional. I remember crying and begging for it to be over already. I decided to go into the birthing suite and try the birthing pool. Once we got to the hospital, because I was at 42 weeks, it was policy for them to put me on the monitor. Something I wanted nothing to do with and I remember trying to rip it off and wanting to tell my midwife to get F$%#D! get it off! However, the monitor showed some irregularities, which very quickly became aparant of fetal distress. Within seconds I had hundreds of doctors and nurses running around doing ten things to me at once. By this stage I gave up. I didnt care if I died, I was in so much pain and literally exhausted. My poor boyfriend was terrified, and my poor mother was trying to hold everyone together! I had to be rushed into theatre for an emergency c-section. I didnt have time for an epidural, which takes 20mins to kick in, they just had to quickly put me under, open me up and rip her out. They were expecting to revive a dead baby, but for some miracle, my little girl was alright. It still grinds me that I labored for that long completely drug free only to have an ending like that. Afterwards I was full of drugs, exhausted and overwhelmed. I didnt know what to make of this baby they stuck on my boob. I then suffered a womb infection and mastitis. In hindsight, I think it was because my body was in a state of exhaustion from the lengthy labour and began to shut down.

So! I am now 31 weeks pregnant with baby number two and have the option presented to me to try again with a natural birth, or to go in for a cool calm and collected elective cesearian. I would love to experience pushing out my own baby, that high that others talk about, and then the relatively quick recovery. However, I am frightened that my body will react the same way to labor, I will be overdue, it will take a long time, I wont dialate and just end up with a ceaser anyway. Am I being selfish for putting this baby at risk after what happened last time?
On the other hand, I really like the idea of having a set date, knowing exactly what I am in for and feeling secure in the saftey of my baby. But then there is the 6 weeks recovery, not ideal when i also have a 3year old, and the fact that i miss out on any of the excitement. I dont get to have my waters break or feel like I 'achieved' something great by having the baby myself. Does this make sense?

While I realise this is a decision only I can make, my OB and GPs are sitting completely on the fence with this one, I would really like to hear what other people think.

I gotta say I am leaning more towards a ceaser, but feel guilty and like I am missing out with that option.

Your thoughts?

I had an emergency CS with DD, 3 days of crappy labour followed by 8 hrs of proper labour, an hour of pushing and fetal distress.

I AM having a VBAC this time (hopefully) as I had PND following DD's birth and no connection with her for nearly 5 months. We failed spectacularly with Bfing.

I am willing to go 10 days overdue then I'm going in to be induced. I've already said no to full time monitoring unless they can do it so I can move around.

Do what you feel you need to do, no-one can make the decision for you, but that's mine.

I haven't had a c-section before so I can't comment on that part but if you really want to try a VBAC but don't want to be left to labour for days on end with a crappy situation like last time then maybe talk through this with your Dr/MW. Ask them about what happens if you have been in labour for over 24hrs and things are not progressing. Talk through the fears you are having and if they can alleviate them then it may be an option. While it might seem nice and tidy having a date and c-section etc will you regret not having the other experience?

Not all pregnancies are the same and that goes for births. It sounds like your last ordeal was incredibly traumatic and has left you with lots of questions fears which is totally understandable. If your Dr and MW can be onboard with some where in between, i.e trying for a vbac but making it clear when to take the next step and what the next step is, then perhaps you can have the chance of having a beautiful, natural birth with out the nightmarish situation that unfolded last time??

Perhaps you could explain what your ideal would be and ask them if this could pan out in reality or what their experience is. Meet with both of them together and ask for a plan. Good luck in your decision!!

Lucky Salem, my MW spoke to me about Continuous Fetal Monitoring which initially sounded good as last time I was strapped to the bed/monitors etc. However, after doing some more research on it, my hubby and I decided against it as although it gives more movement and flexibility, it involves screwing in a tiny spring like a pen spring into the baby's scalp. Apparently it is very safe etc but the thought of it going through where the fontanelle is etc just makes me cringe. I think if we need monitoring I will let them put it on for blocks and jsut get up to the toilet every 20mins or so.

No I've been told that they want me to sit on a bed with the monitor straps on for the whole labour, that I've refused. They've said they dont do any mobile type of monitorig.

Although I have said I'll start off with the straps, then I want to be left alone apart from normal hand held monitor as they would a normal labour.

Can you be induced and then if things don't progress continue on to a c section... I had an emergency one with dd because of failure to progress on my own and with being induced

Hi sorry you had such an awful first time. I had a c-section with my twins and am going for vbac this time . Have you asked if can perhaps make sure you dont go over and maybe induce you at 40 weeks and see if this helps i think you really need to discuss this in more depth with the dr and explain how frightened you are of things going bad again and how this might be prevented , maybe once your contractions have started get you in earlier and make sure things progress better and quicker .
Either way you decide do not feel guilty about it , you are doing an amazing thing by nurturing you baby inside you and thats the real miracle .
good luck with whatever you decide
xx

Hey

Your labour sounds like mine but i had an epidural before hand so didnt need to be put under a general. I went to 42 weeks and didnt diltate past 2cm and i was in labour for 3 days also!
This time im going to speak with my consultant and ask can i have a sweep dead on 40 weeks hoping that something will happen. i dont think they can induce you with drugs this time because of risk of scar rupture so you would probs be given a c-section date if you went over by a certain amount of days anyway.
I am going to try for a vbac this time as ill have a 17 month old and i want to be back to normal as quick as possible. My midwife has said though if i wasnt dilating again they wouldnt leave for aslong as they did with my first they would just take me into theatre!
I hope this helps a little. xxx

I have discussed induction, and like LeanneFox mentioned, they wont do it due to previous scar tissue and risk of rupture.
I just feel like, if anything goes wrong, they're guna run me strait to theatre anyway, and I would prefer to be in control this time.
Still undecided though.
god, i bet I will have one contraction and go, Oh! I remember this! Screw doing this again! Take me in take me in!
haha