RANT

i had an emergency c section with my 2nd, well the day i got out of hospital we arrived home about 8pm and within 10 mins we had his brother in law and sister their and their 2 kids, his dad, his half sister and his mother and her rockweiler his mother had travelled from england but NO warning of them turning up.. they just arrived! they sat on their bums and got waited on (tea's, coffee's etc) NO help! they expected me to pass the baby round, the dog was running round my livingroom (im in a small flat) i was breast feeding so couldnt even feed the baby and i was sooo tired and emotional! they stayed for a good 2-3 hours then when they left the place was a tip!! well did i loose my head after they went
iv told dh HE has to tell everyone NOT to come round here for the first 2 days and he better or i will go apsolutly mental on him , if anyone just turns up he has got to ask them to leave. i dont expect his mum to appear as iv fallen out with her cause she is a very selfish woman!
my family all live in england and my mum will be comming up to stay but shes told me she will come up when i phone and ask her too.
am i being out of order??
his family have really pissed me off since iv been pregnant this time, iv had no help at all.. no ones bothered asking how everythings going but im sure when the baby is here they will ALL want to be 'involved' well.. they can all piss off!!! (im high risk and my 3rd became an angel when he was 4 days old) so you would think they could have helped maybe just a little
i dont know.. am i being a bitch??

xx

Ive said the exact same thing to my OH, his mum had a strop the other day because she heard me calling the bump 'immi' they have always called it piggles...she didnt bother to ask why we were saying 'immi' so doesnt care that weve picked names but i know another argument is coming when i go into labour and shes not allowed near until ive had chance to clean up and spent some time with my OH and baby. Plus his mum and dad turn up unannounced all the time and ive already said i dont want ANYONE round for the first few days whilst we get into a routine but i know its going to be me sending HIS parents away. My mum is just like yours and has said she will wait until she asked to come round and help.
Know ive not really given you any advice but hope you find some comfort in others having the same problem.
Hope your OH can stand up to his family and friends when they are at the door x

i think your quite right too not want them round right away, i wouldnt especially if they expect too be waited on.
Hopefully your partner will tell them not too come round in the first 2 days cos i definitley couldnt deal with it.
What was his mum thinking bringing her rottweiler to run around your front room?! thats the last thing you need after having a baby, a room full of people to wait on and a dog running around especially at 8 at night i would have probably exploded!
xx

Dont think you're being a bitch, Why are some families so thoughless and selfish? Its common sense for anyone to ask first, i know my family will phone first to see if its ok for them to come over....you've been through a really horrible time and need more support than stress, feel bad for you but you stick to your guns, its your baby, you should be respected enough that what you want/say goes..... Imagine bringing bloody dog over too ffs,(nothing against dogs,i have one but wouldnt want someone else bringing theirs the minute im home) i live in flat and could imagine how stressed id be and i prob will be when get lots visitors.Your mum sounds lovely tho

hell no i would be the same!! I have told OH he is to be my bouncer and no way is anyone turning up out of the blue! the only one who is welcome to just turn up anytime weather I am tired or not is my Dad because he has been here for me from the beginning and as much as I hate unannounced visitors as it is, if he turns up he never stays for long he just checks up and makes sure we are all good and won't even have a cuppa if we offer him one if he can see we are busy. Anyone else turning up i will not be afraid to tell them to p*** off until invited.

No not at all your being totally reasonable , i cant believe they would do that , it might be different if it was just his sister and she came round and waited on you hand and foot , but they should understand . Stand your ground tell your dh they are not aloud round without an invite . Good luck with everything x

NO YOU ARE NOT BEING MEAN/SELFISH/OUT OF ORDER
YOU HAVE THE SAME RULES AS ME


who the heck expects to see a baby at 1/2 days old, i certainly don't! I'd wait to be invited to come and visit!
i dont really get on with my MIL either so if she just turns up she'll be getting a shock when i tell her she can come back 'next week'
its not fair that it seems like you're expected to entertain people just as you've been through one of the hardest things we're ever going to have to do.
(especially after making sure the house we live in looks lovely for when baby arrives so we have no extra things to worry about! hehe)


- feel your pain hun.
you're doing it right sweetie.
good luck. xxxxx

Your being perfectly fine in my eyes. I've banned everyone from coming near me when bubba arrives. My house is off limits until I've decided I'm ready to see everyone. I'm not telling anyone when I go into labour (except oh obviously)
and I think everyone is well aware not to be ringing me or texting me as I won't reply at all and won't answer the phone. Hahaa.

Birth and the first few days are a vital part of having a baby and you will be feeling crappy and minging as it is without having to deal with this scary newborn that you don't know what to do with!

Don't feel bad just enjoy the fact you've put your foot down and will get a fab bonding time with bubba!

Didnt want to read and run, I dont think you're being selfish at all. I hated when I had my first baby and woke up to a room full of people...
Not only are you trying to get over the fact you just gave birth but you're tired and just want to spend some Quality Quiet time with the baby YOU have carried and cared for.. For the past 10months.

I think your DH would understand aswell, At the end of the day hun its your birth and your recovery, Put your foot down even if its just to DH and let him deal with his family!

thankfully all our family live out of the country and our friends are pretty good about calling before showing up on the doorstep i would just like people to want to come over and see the baby caus being number 2 and not having family around to fuss im not sure if anyone else will fuss much at all,