Ok I really really really need to get this out now, because I'm FUMING.

There have many times when I've wanted to write a thread ranting about this but each time I've stopped myself because the story is FAR TOO LONG! I'm going to try my hardest to cut it down, but I want people to understand just how bad it is.

Basically I couldn't carry on living in my old house, I split up with FOB and having no savings of my own and only working part time, I couldn't afford to put a deposit down and rent a flat. I'd hit rock bottom. So I went to the council. After 5 long months of getting NOWHERE with them, they finally referred me to "Bartlett's"....

So you get put in a house temporarily, once you've had your baby and they "feel" you're ready to move on, they write to the council or something and your need to be housed on the housing register goes up a band or 2 (I'm currently in band 4, 1 up from the bottom band!!)...

Anyway, since being here I have learned that Bartlett's is mainly for teenage mothers with "issues", eg drugs, crime, violence, can't look after themselves, are too young to be responsible for themselves and their baby etc etc, you get the picture....not a normal average 22 year old woman who has lived independently for 6 years, has only A and B grades in her GCSE and A Levels (I'm not bragging HONEST, I'm just trying to give you an understanding of how unsuitable this place is for me)....in other words, I do not get involved with crime or violence or social services (pretty much all these girls have social workers)...I am just your average 20 something year old single mum who just wants somewhere safe to bring up her baby.

ANYWAY. Here is the issue. I moved in here (it's a 2 bedroom house) on the 13th of July. Already living here was a 16 year old girl who has a 9 month old baby girl. I am going to write a list of the things I have had to put up with since living here.

1. She is literally the most dirty, unhygenic person I have ever met in my life. She is in the same league as the kinds of people you see on "How Clean is Your House?" I'm bloody OBSESSED with cleanliness and I'm fed up with cleaning up after her all the time. When she finally does do her washing up, she does it in cold water with NO WASHING UP LIQUID. I have found dirty plates, cups and cutlery put back in the cupboards and drawers. Last week I had a stomach upset and I wouldn't be surprised if it was because of her. She never hoovers, cleans the toilet, cooker etc (the usual things that clean people do)- she leaves it for me- the heavily pregnant girl to do. I can't actually find the words to describe what a dirty lazy little cow she is. It's shocking and unbelievable.

2. Here is the most shocking part. This girl was pregnant with her daughter at 14. 2 weeks after I moved in here, she came in with her STEPDAD. They went up to her room, locked the door and had sex. I do not tell a lie. They didn't even try to be subtle about it, you could hear everything. They then came down and he left, she was in different clothes and put a nappy bag in the wheelie bin outside! EW. This happened once more and I made a complaint to Bartlett's because not only is that absolutely DISGUSTING and WRONG, but this is my home too and she's using is as a BROTHEL! Bartlett's reported this to her social worker. It has since come out that her stepfather is almost certainly the father to her baby, making him a paedophile. I had a phonecall from a policewoman asking me if I'd be willing to go to the station and make a statement, and I did. I was then told that there would be a possibility I'd be needed in court. As a result of all this, she is now banned from ever being alone with her baby and banned from going anywhere near him. Yet she's with him ALL the time, and the most disgusting thing is, the other weekend I spent an hour cleaning the bathroom from top to bottom, was just taking the cleaning stuff down stairs, when she came in, went straight in there, came out again 10 mins later and went straight out again, I went in the bathroom and in the bottom of the bath was a layer of PUBES- she'd come home to shave herself and gone straight back out again. Totally pissing all over the fact that I'd spent an hour of my time cleaning the bathroom.

3. She is actually breaking the terms of her license thing by not having her baby here. I have been here almost 3 months now and I'm here pretty much all the time. Her baby has been here 3 TIMES.

4. She comes in at 11.30 to midnight every night, slamming doors and wakes me up. She then wakes me up at 7 every morning doing the same thing. How can I have a baby in here when she's doing this?

5. She steals and uses my things, uses my toilet roll, milk etc etc. Petty things but stealing nonetheless.

The house next door is also a Bartlett's house and there were 2 girls living there. One is 20 and has a 3 month old boy. Her boyfriend is banned from entering the property as he constantly beats her up in front of her son. He's there all the time anyway and they stand in the back garden with their mates smoking drugs, in front of the baby. They have social services involved and are on the verge of the baby being taken away.

The other girl who lived there was 18 and me and her got on brilliantly, she's a lovely girl. She had £20 stolen by the other girl who lives there and her mother came round to sort the situation out. It all ended with people getting hurt and 4 police cars and an ambulance coming round. I went out the front to find out if she was ok and the poor girl was crying her heart out scared out of her mind. So her and her OH and uncle came into mine to have a cup of tea and calm down, and she wanted to go outside in the garden to have a cigarette. I went out there with her so I knew she was safe. I then got torrents of abuse from the girl who stole the money/smokes drugs etc and her wife beating boyfriend out their bedroom window...since then they have threatened to hurt me and my family.

I think that gives a general idea of the kind of place I have to live in right now. I've been put into a world of violence, crime, drugs, social services, it's not safe here. My baby is due in just over 5 weeks and there's NO WAY I can bring him in here I don't know what to do. I have been complaining to Bartlett's since day 1. Nothing has been done. It'll be at least another 2 or 3 more months till I can get out of here.

Why I have been put into this place, I don't know. I'm grateful I have a roof over my head but this isn't right. I don't have any "special needs"...I don't need support workers or anything like that and they know it, they've even said that I don't need any of this, I just need to be rehomed.

I'd also like the mention that when I first moved in, I told them that I needed to either have handles fitted on the sides of the bath, so I could get out safely, OR, a shower fitted as there is no shower, just a bath. I offered to pay for it out of my own money but they said no as it's against health and safety and that they needed to do it. I asked 4 times for this to be done but 3 months later and nothing. I get stuck in the bath and get so frightened that I'll slip and fall...there's nothing for me to grab onto when I try to get out!

ALSO, 2 weeks after moving in, the fridge broke. There was a thermometer thing in there that goes black if the temperature is at a dangerous level and my food was almost warm! I rang the emergency number they provided and they had a go at me for ringing them at the weekend and said that I'll have to deal with it till monday. Monday came and went and nothing was done. I told them at least 10 times that the fridge was broken and that I could get listeria and it needed to be fixed. It took 3 WEEKS and I don't exagerrate....for them to finally turn around and say "yeah it's not working, we'll put a new one in there"...which then took another week to do.

I'm sure I must have some kind of legal rights here, it's not safe for me or my baby to be here. I was thinking of writing everything down and going to the citizen's advice bureau and seeing what can be done because Bartlett's are doing nothing about any of this. What do you ladies think?

OH and just to add to the drama, for 3 days now there has been a pile of her stuff sitting on the counter in the kitchen, stuff that has been lying around the house that I've put on there. This includes a bowl of mouldy noodles, a pair of smelly socks, and a load of dirty dishes. This morning I sent her a text saying this: "You need to get your backside home NOW and do your washing up PROPERLY with hot water and washing up liquid and clean your shit up including your dirty socks, you are absolutely DISGUSTING. I am sick to death of you being a lazy dirty little cow and expecting me to clean up your shit all the time, how dare you?! I don't spend hours of my time cleaning this house for you to come home and piss all over it, who the hell do you think you are?! I want it sorted by the end of the day."

I got the reply "fuck off".

This is what I get when I tell her to do it. I'm so angry I'm shaking. What can I do? I can't take this anymore, the stress is unhealthy.



UPDATE

Oh my god I'm shaking and I can't stop crying, I'm going to be SICK. I don't know what to do I can't calm down. I really need help. She has been sending me abusive text messages all day and I've ignored every single one of them. I will update more very soon but I need to know if it's appropriate for me to call the police right now. I'm home alone and pregnant, she is not here and she's text saying she is going to get her own back on me. Is that enough to call the police?


UPDATE

Hey everyone, finally got a chance to sit and update about what's been going on. If I could give all of you a nice gift then I would, you're all unbelievably supportive and caring and it's people like you who help me hold my head up and remember that for every mean person there are thousands of nice loving people

So, monday night... (I think all this happened on monday night, everything's been such a blur)....I called the police after posting on here and told them that I'd been threatened over text message and was experiencing painful tightenings, one on top of the other and was scared...the man on the other end of the phone was so lovely and insisted I wasn't wasting their time at all. (On my ambulance report they've actually catagorised it as a class B emergency, class A being a worst case scenario so I definitely did the right thing!)

Ten minutes later 2 paramedics turned up and I let them in. I can't tell you how amazing these guys were, they were heros. They had me in fits of giggles the whole time and calmed me down and reassured me. They checked me over and thankfully I wasn't in labour, PHEW. They then had to decide what to do with me as they couldn't leave me in that house and by law had to find me somewhere safe to go...the options were a friend or family's house, or a+e. Being half 12 at night, I insisted I didn't want my parents to be woken up and worried and hassled, not to mention the fact that it was humiliating! But the paramedic was SO PUSHY bless him and he said if I didn't allow them to drive me round there then they'd get the police round to drag me there kicking and screaming!

So they tried ringing first, no answer....so they drove me round there, I stayed in the ambulance with 1 paramedic while the other went to knock on the front door, GULP. He came back a few minuites later and said my parents were up and waiting for me....they walked me to the front door, holding my hands bless them! And came in and my poor mum was completely out of it and on planet mars but she was so worried My stepdad was a bit more arseholey about it and just grumbled and sodded off back to bed but he was on call and needed sleep so I don't blame him. So they stayed there for about an hour hinting that they wanted a cup of tea and chatted to me and mum, said how disgusted they were at my situation etc etc, gave me some advice and checked me over again and went on their way. I actually feel really sad that I'll probably never see them again They were angels to me and went out of their way to help me.

Mum set me up a blow up bed on the living room floor and went off to bed. I only managed to get an hour of sleep and the sleep that I did get, I had a horrible nightmare about this forum actually! I dreamt that the evil girl was posing as one of you so she could spy on me and the things I posted about...anyway the next morning the police rang and asked me if I could go down and make a statement, so stepdad dropped me off at the station on his way to work.

I got seen by 2 policemen (my god, MY GOD, they were so FIT. In their uniforms as well...I had to get in a lift with both of them....one either side of me... some VERY rude things appeared in my head ) Anyway...they listened to what happened and said that yes she had directly threatened me and there were things they could do about that. They said she was a nasty little shit and that they dealt with girls like her all the time. But HEE HEE they sat there and said "we can't believe you're in Bartlett's, you're such a lovely girl what are you doing in there?!"

So off I went to the council...told them what happened...someone went off and came back "oh we phoned Bartlett's, they said they will put you into another house"....so I said "well no that's not good enough, that doesn't solve the problem, I could be put into another house with similar people"...and she said in so many words that if I didn't like it then there was nothing else they were willing to do for me.

Then I went to the Bartlett's offices...I was there for a few hours....wrote down all the text messages she'd sent me, they gave me options, they said that either they could ask Jade to leave, but weren't sure of how legal it was to just evict her as she's under social services and is only 16. (disgusting if you ask me after the way she's treated all the nice people who have tried to help her, they shouldn't carry on being so lenient on her she'll never learn)...or they could move me into another place. I said I would prefer to stay in my own house as moving stuff around at 34 weeks pregnant when I'm settled and stuff wasn't really practical and why should I have to move out of my home when I've been nothing but polite and respectful and tolerant of things...but on the other hand, she could still come back and terrorise me....

So they said that night that I could stay in another house and see what happens...so I went there with a few things and met a girl there who'd moved in that day herself. We got on really well and sat chatting for hours....I'm still very very suspicious of everyone as there have been a couple of times I've thought HMM about things she's said to me, but the other girls are all lovely and they're all 22/23 so no playground antics FINGERS CROSSED (although I don't have very high hopes after what I've just experienced).

So I chose to move in here, I can move everything in on saturday. From what I heard, evil girl from the old house got escorted round there by police yesterday, she grabbed a bag of things and they escorted her away again. I don't know what that was about. She had a big meeting with Bartlett's and all the managers were there. I don't know the outcome but as far as I'm converned, she'll get away with it and probably gloat to herself that she drove me out of my own home. But we'll let karma deal with her

I acutually had 2 midwives, the health visitor and the labour ward at the hospital all phone me up and ask me if I was ok. I can't believe how nice people are seriously!!

As for the debate that went on in this thread....as I said I totally understand both viewpoints but I will say this. She hasn't had a bad upbringing, she was actually more privaleged than most people I know. People are constantly trying to help her but she sticks 2 fingers up at them, swears, has no respect, manners or appreciation for anyone or anything. From what I hear, her daughter was taken away because they found evidence of sexual abuse and they believe it was caused by her. She smokes crack, drinks, you name it...I know everyone is different but just because bad things have happened to you doesn't mean that you have to turn into a bad person...if you really had kindness and goodness in your heart, you would learn from the bad experiences and become stronger from them, not find pleasure in tormenting other human beings. I know that bad experiences can turn people bitter and angry but she has everything on a plate for her, and hasn't actually had a bad life at all. She shoudl be grateful for everything she has and grateful that she has had such a privalged upbringing... As for what happened with her stepdad, I can see how he could have groomed her and made her feel loved and believe he loved her....I don't suppose any of us can judge. I'm just not going to make any excuses for her because I genuinely feel she is a disgusting and nasty human being and doesn't have an ounce of decency or respect or even love in her body. I think you can only make excuses for people for so long before you need to realise there really is no excuse for certain types of behaviour. OH WELL I'm out of there now and I'll only be in here for 2 months at the most with any luck!

If you read all that and didn't fall asleep, what the hell is wrong with you?

Once again thankyou so much ladies, you're all amazing! Without sounding like a total SOP I actually had a little cry over the things you'd written loads and loads of hugs xxxxx :hug s:

Oh. My. God.
The girl you are living with sounds absolutely vile and the way that you have been treated is disgusting. With regards to the association's attitude, it stands to reason that they should understand that you are PREGNANT and need a clean, comfortable place to live without having to room with a filthy, thieving skank. The part about her stepdad... well, it's disgusting in so many different ways.
It sounds as though you have been remarkably patient in the circumstances but I think that you are correct in seeking legal advice. I've never been in that sort of situation and don't know anything about housing law, but morally I think they should certainly be doing more to help you.
Keep your chin up, you seem like a lovely person from all your posts and I'm really sorry that you have this stress at the moment. xx

I can't believe you are having to live like this! i had no idea such a place existed and that it could be run so badly! Supposedly this is supposed to be helping you! Clearly not. I would indeed get yourself down to a Citizens advise bureau.

I'm guessing you do not have and family or friends that you could stay with? You are right though the stress being caused cannot be good for you or your baby and living in such unhygienic conditions (there's only so much cleaning you can do) is horrible!

Surely animals live better than you at the moment - i really hope you can get something sorted and get out of there. I really can't imagine what you are going through.

good luck - you don't belong there.

sound awful hun, poor you
I don't have any useful advice apart rom reporting this to thr housing place.
Do you have any family you can stay with??
What about looking up any charities/church groups etc? They might be a bit nicer

take care
xxx

Jesus hun i would also be pissed off!!! im so sorry you are going thru this shit!!! i would write that letter hun and get this sorted! Some people just dont give a rats ass!
Im so mad for you!!!

have u listed/logged everything and reported it to bartletts and our council and cab honey? You need to and you need to make sure they listen no mtter what you cannot live like this xx

What a horrible situation you're in... I can't even really begin to imagine what that must be like, and at this stage of your life... just horrible.

Sounds like you're surrounded with all the types of people who belong in that type of accommodation, whereas you certainly don't... is there any way you can get back on to your local council about it? If I were you I'd write a really heart wrenching letter to your local MP and keep writing to him until he listens, once he's picked up your case he'll fight your corner with the council and housing associations. The story is something that really would make him listen, they deal with lesser issues every day.

Also, you could try posting in the girly sanctuary... there are loads of women on here who work in the council and for social services who might be able to offer you some direct form of advice. Citizens advice are worth a shot too if you haven't tried them already.

If you still have some of your HIP/Sure Start grant left then you could always put a deposit on a flat somewhere and claim LHA which for you would be about £45 per week, but with a baby is around £115 per week. I mean, I know it's a hassle but if you can just afford that first little bit... you and baby could be out of there a lot sooner than 2/3 months. However, if it's not an option and that money has been spent on baby/other essentials then really, go with the MP thing. The council has pretty much failed you so it's time to take it further.

I'd go to the CAB and get some advice. Keep a record of any incidents and conversations that you have with your landlords as possible future evidence.

im so sorry you are having to live like this is there no one at all you can stay with?

aww hun, i feel for you. thats not right and the council are out of order putting you there. IF i had a spare room you could come and stay here.

i would suggest you take photos of her mess, record the noise she makes, keep a diary of daily goings on (back date it IF you can), go back to the council and as you say CAB explain all and show them the evidence you have (as above) and see where you stand.

do you have any housing associations where you live? IF so contact them as they sometimes move quicker at housig than the council do.