cparks1

Hello ladies. I have been feeling really smothered by my husband lately and I have been getting moody about it a little bit. He is constantly around me. I went to a baby shower the other weekend and we weren't even an hour into the party and he called and asked what I was doing. I could barely hear him cause we were playing games and everyone was being loud so I told him I would have to call him back and he got upset and hung up. He went to the doctor and found out that he has shingles (adult chicken pox) so I have been trying to keep my distance from him to protect the baby. Well, he is always like "How come you never want to do anything with me?" "How come you never talk to me?" I do, I'm around him non-stop (besides being at work). I love him, but dang, I need my space and time away from him. I don't have many girlfriends to hang out with so I mostly stay at home. It just seems like he is always complaining about something that I don't do, but I clean the house, pay the bills, do laundry and take care of us both. If I didn't do all of this, our house would fall apart. He did paint the nursery over the weekend and I am very thankful that he did, but it only got done because he's excited about the baby. I wish he got excited like that to clean house.

Do any of you feel smothered now that you are pregnant? It's like the male dominating me, I'm carrying my husband's child so therefore he can't let me out of his sight otherwise he needs to know what I am doing every minute of every day. It's just how I feel. I know he loves me and the baby and is only trying to be there for me, but I need some space.

Vickie

Have you tried talking to your husband about how you feel? The stress can't be good for you or the baby. Tell him you need a few hours a week, just to yourself to do what you like to do and suggest he do the same with his friends.

Whisper

Aww hun i don't know how you feel at all, my OH can be quite the opposite maybe they could share there over excitement and underexcitement and then become normal ?!
It sounds like he is really in love with you even more so now you are carrying his child, have a chat with him and explain i'm sure he will understand. He obviously cares about you a lot but is maybe finding it hard to express in useful ways, men need directions.....give him some ideas about how he can make you feel appreciated by maybe helping with the housework a but more?
I sound like i hate men, i really dont (i have a rubbish way with words) but they are quite often like children they need to be told what to do else they get lost and confused.
Good luck i hope he does give you some space
xx

amy_tea

My hubby is the opposite... i wish he would be a bit more clingy towards me.. i hope he gives you the space you need though

cparks1

Thanks ladies. I know he means well, but if he would do stuff around the house I would appreciate it. It seems like I do everything and don't get any appreciation for it. Of course, we have had many fights over house work stupid stuff like that, but it is always the same so I guess I just quit trying. He's a good man and I know he just overly excited about the baby. I just don't have the heart to tell him to back off a little.

Ann-Marie

Try finding him something to keep him occupied... does he have a hobby or something that you can catch his attention with. Tell him you're going maternity underwear shopping.... surely he wouldn't want to come for that... and go for a coffee somewhere

I so know what you mean about the housework... I can get my 'cleaning head' on, and when he comes home, instead of commenting on what I have done, he finds something that I haven't done... like wipe a miniscule smudge off the mirror.... Men !!!!

cparks1

Or they trash what you have accomplished by not picking up after themselves. I absolutely hate that. I'm a bit of a neat freak so I'm never happy with how our house looks (I get that from my mom, but she is worse than me, lol!!!)

He is going to start fishing now that it's getting warmer out, hopefully that will keep him occupied. He gets mad at me sometimes because I am a tv junky and I have shows to watch on certain nights. I have always been that way though. At least I'm not out spending money we don't have, right??? I'll have to try the shopping excuse (he hates shopping).

Gabi

Shame. I don't know how you feel though.

I hope you can sort it out soon. I agree with what the others have said. Maybe talk to him about it. If all else fails... yeh the underwear shopping might do it. If I tell my husband I want to go shopping for clothes (any type it doesn't matter) he won't want to follow me around. He hates it! And if he phones I usually can't hear the cellphone either because of the noise or the bad reception. He knows this too so he doesn't bother calling.

tinytoes

maybe you can give him a big DIY porject to do?! To get him from under your feet - maybe he can build something?! Tell him you like some things making....toy box? wardrobe?!

KarenLV

He sounds a bit insecure. Maybe just let him know how you feel about him? Does he have any male friends that he could hang out with? I'm sure this will all sort itself out. My husband is also a bit clingy now that I'm pregnant but I'm enjoying it. He painted the nursery too and even stitched the curtains.I'm being spoiled rotten.