I'm really really scared...

katekatekate · Dec 1st, 2009, 06:33 AM

Of giving birth. I'm only 25 weeks but I keep reading about possible complications and I'm scaring myself. I'm worried because I never imagined I would ever have kids and I can't imagine having an actual baby myself and now I'm thinking maybe I think that because I somehow know I'm going to die giving birth. I'm only 19 and I'm scared. And I want to tell my midwife I'm scared without feeling like an idiot. So far my pregnancy has been normal and perfect (no sickness or anything) and I feel like it'd be just my luck if I died.

Someone please help.

Emx · Dec 1st, 2009, 06:45 AM

You really need to talk to your midwife about your fears - she can go a long way to reassuring you about things aswell as suggesting prenatal classes you can attend to try and give you added reassurance... at the end of the day we were made to have babies hon, so its one of the most natural things in the world for our bodies to do.. complications in pregnancy and birth are much, much rarer than you think, especially because of how we are looked after these days. You arent alone in feeling a bit scared though - I am 36, pregnant with my first baby and I too get a bit nervous about the thought!! xx

katekatekate · Dec 1st, 2009, 06:47 AM

My midwife is a guy but there are usually 2 midwives in there also who are female. They're all really nice and jokey but when they ask me if I have any questions I just freeze up and say no and smile and leave.
I just feel scared because it feels like my life is finally coming together and Ive never known things to happen exactly how I want it to.

katieeandbump · Dec 1st, 2009, 06:51 AM

dont worry hun its completely normal to be scared! im shittin 1! lol nd im not worried about the pain or anything like that im worried about dying!! like u i think 'yeh just my luck il be that tiny percentage that die!' but at the end of the day as someone else has said we were made to do this and even if something goes wrong we have all the people around us to help us or our baby! i think once the pain kicks in we will just be thinking about getting them out more than anything else so try not to worry! reading some of the birth stories help me! good luck xxxx

Emx · Dec 1st, 2009, 06:52 AM

Do you have anyone who can go with you to appointments so they can elbow you when it comes to asking questions? Have you got any classes booked? You will find them a really good place to ask questions and meet other women face to face who have the same worries..

katekatekate · Dec 1st, 2009, 06:55 AM

Im going to book some classes. And my OH goes with me, but he's really shy and he wouldn't speak up. I will ask next time. My next appointment is on the 17th. It's good to hear other people are scared too. I feel like I'm just being paranoid and pushy. Google is an arse when you have nothing better to do but google 'complications in labour'.

lanaross · Dec 1st, 2009, 06:56 AM

sweetie with all technology nowadays you are not going to die. I do get like this sometimes, but statistically it's impossible - you're young, giving birth in a developed country, no complications etc. Talk to your mw for reassurance. Nothing is wrong with bringing up this subject, everybody gets worried about this. But there is no chance at all you're going to die

Relax and don't be scared. It's natural for us to give birth, our bodies would know what to do

katekatekate · Dec 1st, 2009, 06:58 AM

Thanks.

I really need to talk to my mw more.

Emx · Dec 1st, 2009, 06:59 AM

Stop googling!!! Have a look on the third tri forum and the birth announcement pages on here - there are lots of really positive stories and lots of women saying how it wasnt as bad as they though it would be!!

katekatekate · Dec 1st, 2009, 07:14 AM

Google is badd! And I will, thankyou.

Dec 1st, 2009, 06:33 AM	#1
katekatekate Pregnant (Expecting) Inactive Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Leeds, UK. Posts: 760	I'm really really scared... Of giving birth. I'm only 25 weeks but I keep reading about possible complications and I'm scaring myself. I'm worried because I never imagined I would ever have kids and I can't imagine having an actual baby myself and now I'm thinking maybe I think that because I somehow know I'm going to die giving birth. I'm only 19 and I'm scared. And I want to tell my midwife I'm scared without feeling like an idiot. So far my pregnancy has been normal and perfect (no sickness or anything) and I feel like it'd be just my luck if I died. Someone please help.

Status: Offline

Dec 1st, 2009, 06:45 AM	#2
Emx Other Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 1,678	You really need to talk to your midwife about your fears - she can go a long way to reassuring you about things aswell as suggesting prenatal classes you can attend to try and give you added reassurance... at the end of the day we were made to have babies hon, so its one of the most natural things in the world for our bodies to do.. complications in pregnancy and birth are much, much rarer than you think, especially because of how we are looked after these days. You arent alone in feeling a bit scared though - I am 36, pregnant with my first baby and I too get a bit nervous about the thought!! xx

Status: Offline

Dec 1st, 2009, 06:47 AM	#3
katekatekate Pregnant (Expecting) Inactive Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Leeds, UK. Posts: 760	My midwife is a guy but there are usually 2 midwives in there also who are female. They're all really nice and jokey but when they ask me if I have any questions I just freeze up and say no and smile and leave. I just feel scared because it feels like my life is finally coming together and Ive never known things to happen exactly how I want it to.

Status: Offline

Dec 1st, 2009, 06:51 AM	#4
katieeandbump Mum (Mom) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: May 2009 Posts: 1,428	dont worry hun its completely normal to be scared! im shittin 1! lol nd im not worried about the pain or anything like that im worried about dying!! like u i think 'yeh just my luck il be that tiny percentage that die!' but at the end of the day as someone else has said we were made to do this and even if something goes wrong we have all the people around us to help us or our baby! i think once the pain kicks in we will just be thinking about getting them out more than anything else so try not to worry! reading some of the birth stories help me! good luck xxxx

Status: Offline

Dec 1st, 2009, 06:52 AM	#5
Emx Other Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 1,678	Do you have anyone who can go with you to appointments so they can elbow you when it comes to asking questions? Have you got any classes booked? You will find them a really good place to ask questions and meet other women face to face who have the same worries..

Status: Offline

Dec 1st, 2009, 06:55 AM	#6
katekatekate Pregnant (Expecting) Inactive Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Leeds, UK. Posts: 760	Im going to book some classes. And my OH goes with me, but he's really shy and he wouldn't speak up. I will ask next time. My next appointment is on the 17th. It's good to hear other people are scared too. I feel like I'm just being paranoid and pushy. Google is an arse when you have nothing better to do but google 'complications in labour'.

Status: Offline

Dec 1st, 2009, 06:56 AM	#7
lanaross Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: Greenwich CT Posts: 3,029	sweetie with all technology nowadays you are not going to die. I do get like this sometimes, but statistically it's impossible - you're young, giving birth in a developed country, no complications etc. Talk to your mw for reassurance. Nothing is wrong with bringing up this subject, everybody gets worried about this. But there is no chance at all you're going to die Relax and don't be scared. It's natural for us to give birth, our bodies would know what to do

Status: Offline

Dec 1st, 2009, 06:58 AM	#8
katekatekate Pregnant (Expecting) Inactive Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Leeds, UK. Posts: 760	Thanks. I really need to talk to my mw more.

Status: Offline

Dec 1st, 2009, 06:59 AM	#9
Emx Other Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 1,678	Stop googling!!! Have a look on the third tri forum and the birth announcement pages on here - there are lots of really positive stories and lots of women saying how it wasnt as bad as they though it would be!!

Status: Offline

Dec 1st, 2009, 07:14 AM	#10
katekatekate Pregnant (Expecting) Inactive Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Leeds, UK. Posts: 760	Google is badd! And I will, thankyou.

Status: Offline

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