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Old Nov 30th, 2009, 06:27 AM   #1
AJM999
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Jealous Sis?


Hi all

I have always been close to my sis but since she found out I was PG she has been going out of her way to make remarks (indirectly or so she thinks)

I cant understand why? I don't know if its jealousy (she has kids) or does nt like the spotlight taken off herself. She always relied heavily on parents where as I was more independant and stood on my own 2 feet.

Its getting to the stage where I have stopped mentioning babys etc because my mum was asking me how i was feeling one evening and she left the room and said I was "boring" her BTW with a laugh!!! So I stopped talking about preg/babies etc and she said to my OH last week that I was in bad form and couldnt talk about anything else when im not talking about myself!!! Like FFS how do I win!!! She also drops hints that apparently he was speaking to a "pretty blonde" client!! (i know the girl, and thats not the case) My OH is going mad and saying she is trying to stir.....I really dont understand why.

I cant even be arsed talking to her about it because she will spin it round and say im "pregnant and mad" and always going on about myself bla bla....

Sorry for the rant, but it is really irritating me!


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Old Nov 30th, 2009, 06:36 AM   #2
Cactusgirl
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that would get right on my nerves too.

It might be that she is concerned that the limelight will be taken away from her kids when your LO comes along.

I personally would just stop talking about the LO in front of her which is a real shame and just ignore any snide comments she makes about your OH. Easier said then done though I know!

x


 
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Old Nov 30th, 2009, 06:38 AM   #3
franiss
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so sorry to hear shes being like this, must be tough especially from your sister, is she trying for another and is jealous maybe? I think you should talk to her about it otherwise you may fall out big time.
xx


 
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Old Nov 30th, 2009, 07:18 AM   #4
dali
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i think you are rigth she is jealous to some degree.... maybe not that she wants another herself ... but she might feel that you having a baby makes her kids less special somehow ? out of interest are her kids the only grandchildren your parents have so far ?


 
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Old Nov 30th, 2009, 09:30 AM   #5
Emx
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I am having similar issue with my sister - which is a real shame as I always assumed she would be really supportive of me as I was when she was pregnant with her two...

She is quite disinterested in talking about my pregnancy and very early on when I was feeling particularly pants and hormonal - she said 'Oh for gods sake, you cant use pregnancy as an excuse to be a bitch' (I wasnt being a bitch just a bit teary abput something AND she was a horrendous bitch when pregnant I might add!!)..

When she was pregnant I used to be thinking about her all the time and phoned regularly for progress reports - she has phoned me twice in 23 weeks and both times were for other things and she didnt get round to asking how I was until later in the conversation!

I really cant get my head around what is the matter with her - only that maybe its because she had POS so had to try hard to become pregnant and I got pregnant first time...

Dont know - I am as stumped as you are, its a shame though, I do know how you feel xx


 
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Old Nov 30th, 2009, 09:48 AM   #6
Junebug_CJ
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I'm in the same position, except my sister doesn't yet have kids...
She was mad at me because we "stole their thunder" by getting engaged 5 months after we met in November 2008. Her boyfriend was about to propose and they'd been together 6 years so she said we had no right to do it before them... They got engaged in December 08. We then got married in June 09 in Mexico and they didn't come, stating they had tons of expenses for their own wedding, but I just found out they booked a trip to Mexico during the Christmas holidays. They themselves got married in October 09, and I had my BFP 4 days before their wedding day. I made sure not to tell anyone since 1) it was their wedding and 2) way too early. Now that I've told her, she jealous again... I'm not sure why she feels we're in competition constantly, I'm 2.5 years older than her yet she can never be happy for me. We were really close as kids and teenagers, but that all fell apart when I got accepted into medical school. Oh well, all we can do is take them as they are, and let everyone else be happy for us. I'm hurt, but this has been going on for years and no amount of talking helps the situation, I discovered...
Good luck to you!!!
CJ


 
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Old Nov 30th, 2009, 10:41 AM   #7
abz
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oh honey. i don't have any siblings so i don't have this particular problem. could you maybe ask your folks to have a word with her without her knowing you'd asked? would they do that for you? if you ask her yourself she may try to turn it around, but maybe if your parents ask her she'll see she's being rather foolish...

abz xx


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Old Nov 30th, 2009, 11:33 AM   #8
AJM999
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Ah thanks Girls......I always feel better on here after ive posted!! :-)

Deli - you are right, yea they are the only ones. They are spoiled rotten by me included and I think that there may be an element of that. I would like to think that she should know im the type of person who would go out of my way to ensure this didnt happen.

EMX - Ditto!! Exactly the same here, im all out of ideas a to what to to anymore. I stopped talking about bubs and apparently I am so self centered I have nothing else to talk about!!

I had contemplated saying to my parents, but because she has always relied on them, they always feel sorry for her. I rowed my own boat and didnt ask for anything and became a sucessful married woman so they always assumed I was strong and were proud of my independane!!

I hate feeling like this but im adamant that she wil not spoil my experience, its quite sad really but jealousy really can cause so muh heartache.

If anything, i have also learnt a lesson. Jealousy is never the way forward and even if the green eyed monster creeps in sometimes, I will never let it show because it is so ugly!!!

Sorry again for the rant, its so good to get it off my chest!! xxx


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Old Nov 30th, 2009, 12:03 PM   #9
abz
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rant away honey, by all means. just because your family thinks you're strong doesn't mean that they will condone all of her behaviour. it isn't showing weakness. it's showing your reaction to disrespect and bad behaviour. maybe they have recognised it too?


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Old Nov 30th, 2009, 12:20 PM   #10
Helabela
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i had a couple of comments off my sister when i first told her, but i expected it because she lost her baby at 8weeks from a one night stand and it was a difficult time, even though im pregnant 2 years after that happened it still must be really difficult for my sis. But now she's been fab buying stuff for her neice and coming round and offering to help out. Maybe you should just chat about it?


 
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