depression rearing it's evil head again...

tinkerbellita · Nov 19th, 2009, 07:50 AM

I was doing so well, dealing with this pregnancy with no meds and a father that pissed off. But now the reality is starting to creep in, that I have given up SO much for this baby already and it's getting me down.

I am trying to make things work with my husband but it's getting me more down. I should be grateful that he loves me as much as he does and that he wants to be a dad to this baby (my baby belongs to a guy I met in Spain when me and husband had split). I am grateful for his support but he earns just £700 a month and we dont even have our own place, everything's gonna be a major struggle.

I want to be back in Madrid, yet the benefit support system out there is crap compared with what I can get here. But jobwise I can earn a LOT more out there.

I miss the fob so much, despite him dissappearing. I'm just feeling down and whingey and that my life really is over.

Seity · Nov 19th, 2009, 10:50 AM

Having to be off the meds makes everything so much harder. Even in the best of circumstances having a child can be stressful. Just this morning I woke up and thought, "What the heck are we doing? I don't know how to raise a child!" But I know once he's here we'll figure things out. You'll figure things out too!

tinkerbellita · Nov 19th, 2009, 15:24 PM

I really hope so. I'm just being selfish and going through a phase of not liking being pregnant.

littledancer · Nov 19th, 2009, 15:37 PM

Quote:

Having to be off the meds makes everything so much harder. Even in the best of circumstances having a child can be stressful. Just this morning I woke up and thought, "What the heck are we doing? I don't know how to raise a child!" But I know once he's here we'll figure things out. You'll figure things out too!

Oh gosh, me too!!

I decided to go off of my anti-depressants when we decided to try to get pregnant. I am happy with my decision overall but have certainly found it very challenging at times. I know that as soon as the baby is born I will need to go back on them, and that is disappointing but I just have to accept that I can't cope without them. Still, I'm glad I took this time off of them and feel I've at least learned something in the process

Feel free to PM if you need to talk at any point, I am very sympathetic to what you're going through.

woadie · Nov 20th, 2009, 01:50 AM

Oh hey I know how you feel... you've had so much go on so it's little wonder you're feeling low. I get feeling so low sometimes it scares me, I'm usually a battler but this pregnancy has really knocked the stuffing out of my emotional core and made it much harder to cope. I also don't think that men recognise the pregnancy emotions and the ups and downs half as much as they'd like to think they do, so that support is often lacking.

tinkerbellita · Nov 20th, 2009, 05:52 AM

I'm also worried about PND or once I have given birth I'll have a manic episode, or doing something irrational like goin to Madrid to find the baby's father with the baby in my arms. Though I'm sure my family, well my dad will be keeping a close eye on for me.

surprisebaby · Nov 20th, 2009, 06:44 AM

omg I worry about the same thing with my fob. That I will do the same when baby is born and go over to Nortern Ireland and try and find their family home. The urge is going gradually, but it's still there to an extent. Now that I have had closure with fob, that feeling went down loads. Its kinda a really panicky feeling of trying to control/sort out the situation. If you're feeling depressed, maybe buy a book on it: Depression for dummies I think is quite useful. Maybe read it now before you give birth so that you're feeling better now.

Nov 19th, 2009, 07:50 AM	#1
tinkerbellita Pregnant (Expecting) Active BnB Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 438	depression rearing it's evil head again... I was doing so well, dealing with this pregnancy with no meds and a father that pissed off. But now the reality is starting to creep in, that I have given up SO much for this baby already and it's getting me down. I am trying to make things work with my husband but it's getting me more down. I should be grateful that he loves me as much as he does and that he wants to be a dad to this baby (my baby belongs to a guy I met in Spain when me and husband had split). I am grateful for his support but he earns just £700 a month and we dont even have our own place, everything's gonna be a major struggle. I want to be back in Madrid, yet the benefit support system out there is crap compared with what I can get here. But jobwise I can earn a LOT more out there. I miss the fob so much, despite him dissappearing. I'm just feeling down and whingey and that my life really is over.

Status: Offline

Nov 19th, 2009, 10:50 AM	#2
Seity Other BnB Elite Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Ithaca, NY Posts: 12,807	Having to be off the meds makes everything so much harder. Even in the best of circumstances having a child can be stressful. Just this morning I woke up and thought, "What the heck are we doing? I don't know how to raise a child!" But I know once he's here we'll figure things out. You'll figure things out too!

Status: Offline

Nov 19th, 2009, 15:24 PM	#3
tinkerbellita Pregnant (Expecting) Active BnB Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 438	I really hope so. I'm just being selfish and going through a phase of not liking being pregnant.

Status: Offline

Nov 20th, 2009, 01:50 AM	#5
woadie Pregnant (Expecting) Active BnB Member Join Date: Aug 2009 Posts: 115	Oh hey I know how you feel... you've had so much go on so it's little wonder you're feeling low. I get feeling so low sometimes it scares me, I'm usually a battler but this pregnancy has really knocked the stuffing out of my emotional core and made it much harder to cope. I also don't think that men recognise the pregnancy emotions and the ups and downs half as much as they'd like to think they do, so that support is often lacking.

Status: Offline

Nov 20th, 2009, 05:52 AM	#6
tinkerbellita Pregnant (Expecting) Active BnB Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 438	I'm also worried about PND or once I have given birth I'll have a manic episode, or doing something irrational like goin to Madrid to find the baby's father with the baby in my arms. Though I'm sure my family, well my dad will be keeping a close eye on for me.

Status: Offline

Nov 20th, 2009, 06:44 AM	#7
surprisebaby Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: Aug 2009 Posts: 823	omg I worry about the same thing with my fob. That I will do the same when baby is born and go over to Nortern Ireland and try and find their family home. The urge is going gradually, but it's still there to an extent. Now that I have had closure with fob, that feeling went down loads. Its kinda a really panicky feeling of trying to control/sort out the situation. If you're feeling depressed, maybe buy a book on it: Depression for dummies I think is quite useful. Maybe read it now before you give birth so that you're feeling better now.

Status: Offline

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