Nothing really to do with my pregnancy as such but had a horrible row with DH the other night which very nearly resulted in him walking out.

It was all because his mum snapped at me for saying his job isn't good pay. She knew I didn't want him to work shifts and long hours but she encouraged him to tie himself into a 2 year contract which he cannot get out of unless he pays them an obscene amount of money. So we are scraping the barrel every month to survive, of course I'm going to despise the place.

So the other day she was round our house and I insulted his job and she snapped, picked up her bags and walked out. I thought it was very rude considering me and my husbands relationship and domestics have nothing to do with her. It wasn't even as if we were having a row really, I just passed comment. Dh wouldn't talk to me afterwards because I'd upset his mum and tbh, I didn't really care. She's been interfering for years and I'd had enough of it. When she discovered I was pregnant this time (which she found out snooping through my Facebook) she said it was a bit silly because I could have an abortion, what sort of grandparent says that?!?! She doesn't pay that much attenion to our two kids we have now so I should have expected it really.

So me and DH had a row that nearly resulted in him walking out. I had to beg him not to leave us. I was in such a state I was getting twinges which made me worse. I even apologised for being nasty about his job, anything for him to stay with us. He was really nasty, saying things that even to think about now, break my heart. All over his mum?!?!

So when we'd calmed down we agreed we wanted to make it work and work through our problems. He said he wasn't going to tell his mum to butt out of our relationship as she was just, 'Defending her son'. So I said that's fine but I no longer want to see her, which we agreed was for the best. If she calls, I'm not going to answer the phone and if she wants to see our kids, I'm going out. It's sad it's come to this but I can't cope with her interferring anymore and I'm going to lose my temper eventually. I just hope it's the right thing to do. I could do without all this stress at the moment and when I started twinging the other night I was so scared.

Aww, I am very sorry! I do remember your other posts about her and she seems to be controlling with your OH, wants his time to be spent taking care of his brother, etc.

At the same time, one cannot come between a mother and child and your husband probably feels hurt. And when it comes down to it, a mother will always defend their child, even when they know that child is wrong.

It must be hard on you that she interferes and I totally understand that.

WTF is she to say that about your unborn child? This is where I am upset. No one has any right to say that to an expecting mother, especially from a family member. That is uncalled for!!!

This mother should let her son live his own life and not interfere, and that's where I have a problem too!

I am sorry you have to go through this! Sending many hugs!

Aww i'm really sorry Snowball, we can can do without any extra stress like this!

My OH is a mummys boy too, it does my head in! He tells her nearly everything! He's had a few words with her about things i was unhappy about which is now resolved But i can't get away with saying anything mean about her lol

Sorry but I think your OH should be sticking up for you a bit more though, you have your own little family now, she's not in charge.

wow. dont cut all ties, i mean - it might make it harder in teh future if the kids want grandma to come round?
But really, she should learn to butt out....has she no faith in her own son to stick up for himself' I mean, so what if you comment on his job..what a cow.

I wouldn't even give her the time of day if she thinks she can interfere like that and get away with it! Your OH needs to stick up for you more, perhaps you were not very diplomatic about his job, but even so you should be his priority.

Interferring MIL's wind me up a lot(you might have guessed) i really feel for you hun especially carrying a lil bean you definitely don't need this kind of stress!

Just an idea, but have you sat down with your OH and actually talked about how his mum makes you feel? i had to do that with my OH and he really took on things on board(actually told his mum to be nicer to me otherwise he wouldnt see her again!) Might be worth a try if you havent already tried it...

Wow... What a complete and utter cow! I know my partners dad told him for me to have an abortion and kicked him out when I fell pg. But he's only 19 and we're also not married. We also do not have anything to do with him.

I can't believe what a bitch she is being to you! It's yours and your OH's business if you want to comment on his job. She should butt out a bit. I do kind of feel for him, as he is probably having a hard time dealing with this tiff, but in a way it's his own fault. As he could talk with her and tell her nicely to back off a bit.
I hope im never a nosey mother like that.
Sending you much

I have tried this. I just get sarcastic responses from him like, 'Oh my mum must be obsessed with you'. It's really difficult to approach with him as he immediately gets on the defensive about it. I'm running out of ideas now and the only one left was just for me to not see her. The last thing I'd want to break up with DH over is her, I wouldn't let her have the satisfaction.

When I said to him to have a word with her he said that he wasn't going to and nothing's going to change. I know you can never come between a mother and her son but it's bordering on the ridiculous at the moment. She even bought him a Kinder Egg the other day!

OMG! Does she think he is 4 years old?

you CAN come betweena mother and her son. When a man gets married his wife should rate higher than his Mum!

tell him to grow up and start looking after his family and being less of a wet lettuce. He's a father, and a husband and needs to start acting like a man.

ooh, gosh, that got me wound up there...hormones!

Haha that's how I'm getting. I just feel I can't say anything now because he'll leave us. He really was serious about going and was even trying to arrange access to the kids the other night, I was so scared. I just think I'll never rate as high as her. I tried to talk to him rationally but he takes it all to heart and gets all sarcastic over it. Short of telling her to butt out myself I don't know what to do. I don't want our marriage left in tatters over her.