Newbie w/ question--Skin to Skin

Fingerslocked · Sep 21st, 2009, 11:36 AM

So I am sneaking over a little early... HELLO everyone! I have a quick question about skin to skin.. or kangaroo care. Who all plans on doing this. I want to but my only concern is telling everyone to back off while I have my time to do this. I just think everyone is going to want to hold the baby and I will feel bad and won't get that important bonding time to help the breastfeeding bond. Thoughts??

hopeforamirac · Sep 21st, 2009, 12:03 PM

Well i think its a great idea and im sure you will want a rest and clean up before visitors pile in.

Im sure you can get some skin to skin time before visitors come

Sparky0207 · Sep 21st, 2009, 12:06 PM

I managed to get a lot of skin to skin time with my first. Not constantly of course, but about an hour or 2 a day (apart from breast feeding) and I think it really helped us bond. Will definitely do it this time xx

QTPie · Sep 21st, 2009, 12:15 PM

No, DEFINITELY go for it! Prime bonding opportunity for you and baby. Baby has just come from the safety and warmth of your uterus, probably had a very traumatic birth (squeezed out into the world) and everything is new to him. Give him/her the opportunity to find some reassurance and love

Also good for you - you need some quiet time with your baby. Your partner does too.

Leave strict (with the MW and your birthing partner) that you want an hour or two alone as a family... Some suggest that OHs should wear an easy to take off top too, so that they can enjoy some "skin to skin" time too.

When I have my baby I want some quality time alone with husband and baby, then I want to get all cleaned up before receiving visitors...

QT

anothersquish · Sep 21st, 2009, 12:44 PM

No way Id want visitors an hour after birth. You barely have chance to know which way is up in those first few hours never mind having to put up with people fussing and passing the poor baby round like a doll.
It is VERY important you (and your OH) get time to spend with the baby, and not just a couple of hours....a SIGNIFICANT amount of time, I would strongly advise you put off visitors until the day after you give birth to give yourself proper time to know baby and get yourself organised.
I dont intend to have anyone other than myself, OH, my son and midwife around in the first 24 hours and then I wont be having crowds of people...you really do not want to deal with it straight after birth (especially if you are bleeding heavily, have stitches, no sleep etc)
Make it clear that whilst friends and family will be welcome you will let them know when you are ready.

Maybebaby80 · Sep 21st, 2009, 12:59 PM

I am def going to do skin to skin, from friends stories I don't think you get much choice in my local hospital - baby is placed straight there to assist with the bonding and breast feeding.

I will be insisting on no visitors until a couple of hours afterwards, I want some quiet time for the three of us to bond and get to know each other.

If OH is not able to stand up to the family then as mentioned previously make your wishes known to the hospital.

Fingerslocked · Sep 21st, 2009, 13:02 PM

thats what i want.. Me and him and baby. BUT..... I know my mom is going to want to be there and I was fortunate to be able to be there at the birth of OH's niece-- and now his SIL wants to watch us. The thing is, is that this is our first and when I was in the delivery room - that was her third baby. I know she will be very bitchy if I say no.. but I really don't want her there and I don't even want my mom in the room at the time.

What should I do?

QTPie · Sep 21st, 2009, 13:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fingerslocked

thats what i want.. Me and him and baby. BUT..... I know my mom is going to want to be there and I was fortunate to be able to be there at the birth of OH's niece-- and now his SIL wants to watch us. The thing is, is that this is our first and when I was in the delivery room - that was her third baby. I know she will be very bitchy if I say no.. but I really don't want her there and I don't even want my mom in the room at the time.

What should I do?

Oh God, no! Be polite, but firm - NO WAY! The only thing that matters, in labour, is what you are comfortable with. Who cares who is bitchy about what - forget about it

We will tell the in-laws and my mother when labour starts, but then our phones will be turned up and they will be under strict instructions not to turn up until invited (not such a problem with my Mum who lives 2.5 hours drive from the hospital, more of a problem with MIL who lives 200 yards form the hospital!). They will get a call a couple of hours after delivery, but we will make a decision then about visitors: whether we are up to a QUICK visit, whether we need a few more hours to recovery or whether to see them the next day. Yes it will be a BIG occassion for them - and they will be dying to meet the baby - but what baby, husband and I want/need it MORE important. Plenty of time for visitors later - the day of birth is a day to be selfish...

QT

Fingerslocked · Sep 21st, 2009, 13:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by QTPie

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fingerslocked

thats what i want.. Me and him and baby. BUT..... I know my mom is going to want to be there and I was fortunate to be able to be there at the birth of OH's niece-- and now his SIL wants to watch us. The thing is, is that this is our first and when I was in the delivery room - that was her third baby. I know she will be very bitchy if I say no.. but I really don't want her there and I don't even want my mom in the room at the time.

What should I do?

Oh God, no! Be polite, but firm - NO WAY! The only thing that matters, in labour, is what you are comfortable with. Who cares who is bitchy about what - forget about it

We will tell the in-laws and my mother when labour starts, but then our phones will be turned up and they will be under strict instructions not to turn up until invited (not such a problem with my Mum who lives 2.5 hours drive from the hospital, more of a problem with MIL who lives 200 yards form the hospital!). They will get a call a couple of hours after delivery, but we will make a decision then about visitors: whether we are up to a QUICK visit, whether we need a few more hours to recovery or whether to see them the next day. Yes it will be a BIG occassion for them - and they will be dying to meet the baby - but what baby, husband and I want/need it MORE important. Plenty of time for visitors later - the day of birth is a day to be selfish...

QT

*SIGH* Your advice makes me feel much better about my decision. My mother will be DYING to get the the hospital. This is the first grandchild and I'm sure she will be at her wits end waiting for the call to come. LOL. I will just be firm with OH's SIL and just say maybe next time.

hayley x · Sep 21st, 2009, 13:15 PM

I used to love skin to skin wit my son and so did my OH. Its nice just to sit and have your baby close like when you was pregnant, I would definately recommend doing it

xxx

Sep 21st, 2009, 11:36 AM	#1
Fingerslocked Pregnant (Expecting) Active BnB Member Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: Ohio Posts: 420	Newbie w/ question--Skin to Skin So I am sneaking over a little early... HELLO everyone! I have a quick question about skin to skin.. or kangaroo care. Who all plans on doing this. I want to but my only concern is telling everyone to back off while I have my time to do this. I just think everyone is going to want to hold the baby and I will feel bad and won't get that important bonding time to help the breastfeeding bond. Thoughts??

Status: Offline

Sep 21st, 2009, 12:03 PM	#2
hopeforamirac Other BnB Addict Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: uk Posts: 5,139	Well i think its a great idea and im sure you will want a rest and clean up before visitors pile in. Im sure you can get some skin to skin time before visitors come

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Sep 21st, 2009, 12:06 PM	#3
Sparky0207 Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Mar 2008 Posts: 5,106	I managed to get a lot of skin to skin time with my first. Not constantly of course, but about an hour or 2 a day (apart from breast feeding) and I think it really helped us bond. Will definitely do it this time xx

Status: Offline

Sep 21st, 2009, 12:15 PM	#4
QTPie Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Mar 2009 Posts: 4,465	No, DEFINITELY go for it! Prime bonding opportunity for you and baby. Baby has just come from the safety and warmth of your uterus, probably had a very traumatic birth (squeezed out into the world) and everything is new to him. Give him/her the opportunity to find some reassurance and love Also good for you - you need some quiet time with your baby. Your partner does too. Leave strict (with the MW and your birthing partner) that you want an hour or two alone as a family... Some suggest that OHs should wear an easy to take off top too, so that they can enjoy some "skin to skin" time too. When I have my baby I want some quality time alone with husband and baby, then I want to get all cleaned up before receiving visitors... QT

Status: Offline

Sep 21st, 2009, 12:44 PM	#5
anothersquish Mum (Mom) Inactive Join Date: Jun 2009 Posts: 5,415	No way Id want visitors an hour after birth. You barely have chance to know which way is up in those first few hours never mind having to put up with people fussing and passing the poor baby round like a doll. It is VERY important you (and your OH) get time to spend with the baby, and not just a couple of hours....a SIGNIFICANT amount of time, I would strongly advise you put off visitors until the day after you give birth to give yourself proper time to know baby and get yourself organised. I dont intend to have anyone other than myself, OH, my son and midwife around in the first 24 hours and then I wont be having crowds of people...you really do not want to deal with it straight after birth (especially if you are bleeding heavily, have stitches, no sleep etc) Make it clear that whilst friends and family will be welcome you will let them know when you are ready.

Status: Offline

Sep 21st, 2009, 12:59 PM	#6
Maybebaby80 Other Active BnB Member Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Scotland Posts: 514	I am def going to do skin to skin, from friends stories I don't think you get much choice in my local hospital - baby is placed straight there to assist with the bonding and breast feeding. I will be insisting on no visitors until a couple of hours afterwards, I want some quiet time for the three of us to bond and get to know each other. If OH is not able to stand up to the family then as mentioned previously make your wishes known to the hospital.

Status: Offline

Sep 21st, 2009, 13:02 PM	#7
Fingerslocked Pregnant (Expecting) Active BnB Member Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: Ohio Posts: 420	thats what i want.. Me and him and baby. BUT..... I know my mom is going to want to be there and I was fortunate to be able to be there at the birth of OH's niece-- and now his SIL wants to watch us. The thing is, is that this is our first and when I was in the delivery room - that was her third baby. I know she will be very bitchy if I say no.. but I really don't want her there and I don't even want my mom in the room at the time. What should I do?

Status: Offline

Sep 21st, 2009, 13:15 PM	#10
hayley x Mum (Mom) BnB Elite Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: Here! Posts: 18,315	I used to love skin to skin wit my son and so did my OH. Its nice just to sit and have your baby close like when you was pregnant, I would definately recommend doing it xxx

Status: Offline

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