so sorry that you are having to deal with this at what should be a very special time for you. I've never been in the situation with my dh, and tbh i'd like to think that if he ever cheated i'd have the courage to end our relationship, as like others as said, the trust would be gone. Having said that, never having been in the situation, it is diffucult to say how i'd ACTUALLY deal with it, it would depend alot on the circumstances, and i KNOW that my dh is NOT a cheat, so it would be totally out of character for him and if he did ever do it, i know that it would be a one-off. Not really helped you there, sorry, i guess what i'm trying to say is is depends alot on your relationship, how solid it is, how likely it is for him to do it again (you said you weren't surprised he'd done it?)... good luck with whatever you decide to do, you will make the right choice. x

Can't give any advice, but

my OH cheated on me when i was 6 months pregnant, We have worked through it but it is really hard
xx

Just wanted to give you a Sorry this happened

Sorry I don't have any experience with this Just wanted to give you a hug

I think if this happened to me the trust would be gone forever, I'd be a paranoid freak all the time (understandably~) and the relationship would be kinda doomed. I'm giving my honest opinion here because trust is everything for me. I don't know how you could cheat on someone you love? I've had plenty of oppertunity to cheat on my bloke in the past, doesn't everyone? But I never would. I'd never even kiss a bloke that wasn't in my family. I love my boyfriend and that's just the way things are. I don't believe in the old 'I was drunk' excuse either. I used to have alcohol issues and if you are with it enough to cheat then you are with it enough to know what you are doing. I'm always honest on here and a few years back (8yrs or so) I was the 'other woman' on a couple of occassions and if the bloke came to me once he usually came again, I guess thats why I have trust issues. Anyway I'm going way off topic here, you have to take bubs best interests in to the equasion to here. It's all too easy to say that LO would be better off with a daddy, but would he/she be better off with a paranoid mummy and a daddy that doesn't respect mummy. One things for sure, if I was in your shoes he'd be out on his ear by now, quite possibly on a perminant basis. He would certainly have to do something bloody good to get back to where he was.

I'm so sorry that this has happened to you. I can't imagine what you are going through. I'm here if you want to talk. You take care xxx

hey hun didn't want to read and run ...i myself was in a relationship once with someone who was practically living a double life...and had no trust after that, i also had an ex who cheated said he loved me and wouldn't do it again, well he did over and over again, he said once he did it the once it was easier to do it after that, so my view on it is if they can do it once they WILL do it again, i love my DH to bits but the day i get a whiff of anything im sorry but im gone, you will always know in the back of your head that he had physical contact with someone else and end up losing trust and it constantly pops up in the background making u think is he doing it again, obv its your call you can only make or break this relationship with your own feelings and love, but the thing u have to ask yourself is can u live without thinking where is he now? is he doing it again? ... i hope you make the right decision for yourself and if u need to talk about it we are all here for you gd luck hunni!! xxx

I too was with a guy who cheated on me some many years ago - I forgave him and took him back, and then it happened again and again and again. I think it became easier to do it, and by taking him back each time it made it seem as though it didn't matter to me that he was a cheat. That experience nearly destroyed my self esteem, respect and dignity and it took me a long time to get over it. Thank goodness for my wonderful husband who came along and helped me turn things around.

That said, I believe there are a million different situations in which someone will cheat, and it is for you to decide what is the best way forward for you and your baby.

Sending you lots of love at this really difficult time

What a complete pig. A man who cheats on his pregnant partner/wife is the lowest of the low in my opinion. Ignoring the obvious emotional stress for you and the impact on his unborn child's health (which is bad enough), there is also your physical health and that of baby to consider. Did he use a condom? Even if he did, this won't stop Genital Warts, Herpes, HPV and quite a few others. OK so the chances of him picking anything up are slim, but they are there, so you should really consider the true impact of his decision to cheat. He didn't -- and that says more about him than anyone else could!

I would say he has told you for two reasons: to ease his concience, and also because he knows you probably won't leave him. Don't give him any kudos for coming clean.

For what's it's worth I think you should leave (or better still, make him leave)! There are plenty of wonderful men out there who would treat you so much better. Why settle for less than even second best?

My son's dad was a complete shit and I *wish* I had left him when pregnant (when my instinct told me something was up), rather than sticking it out for another couple of years and then putting our son through the trauma of a very unpleasant separation.

No you're not stupid but maybe working it out isn't the best thing for you and baby?

My oh cheated on me when i was pregnant with our dd (shes 2 now) it nearly broke us and everynight i couldnt sleep just thinking he had been with someone else, its really hard to get over it but can be done. I still dont trust me oh 100% but he knows he did it again that would be it he would lose everything and if he is prepared to do that shows to me the love for someone else is greater than his family.