You poor chicken! I totally understand how you feel! I was like that when I was pregy with DS (now 2)...nothing fit I just looked fat! I couldnt even fit into a bigger size! My (o)(o) were ginormous! (Im normally a AUS 16 DD) and they went up to a 16 G!!!!!!) WOW!!!!! Even DH said they were too big...and that was just while I was pregy...Milk not even in yet!!!!!
So trust me I know how you feel!
Take care and keep us posted on your development! I too had m/c before this pregy...so now im feeling paranoid! Check out my journal if you like!
Hope all goes well for you sweeety...and congrats on getting to 8 weeks with no hassles! Wish me luck too!
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Well, the last couple days I haven't been on the computer much. Yesterday I was sooooo sick. I woke up in the am with a headache, I was dizzy and couldnt see straight along with vomiting. I felt absolutly awful. What scared me was the dizziness because I walked out into the hallway and fell up against the wall...Shawn asked me if I was ok and I said no that I felt horrible. I was boiling...checked my temp but no fever thank goodness. I litterally felt like I might die...finally Shawn put a dark sheet over top of our blinds to block the sunlight and I went to sleep for a few hours and felt a bit better when I woke up. I pretty much was in bed all day long.
Today, Im feeling okay (knock on wood) so hopefully the rest of my day stays like this. I dont have morning sickness all the time like some people I only get it a day here and there so I am lucky that way...I dunno what I would do if I had it all the time.
Shawn was talking to me the other day in the car and asked me what size diapers newborns wear (hehe I thought it was cute) I told him it says the sizes on it and it would be newborn. He was like "oh ok". I asked him why he wanted to know and he wouldnt tell me. Finally I got him to tell me and he said the next time we go get groceries he wants to start buying a pack of diapers everytime. I thought it was so sweet and a pretty good idea. So I think what we might do is buy some newborn and also other sizes so we have them on hand because you always need diapers. I thought it was pretty thoughtful of him and definitely made me smile.
So, I haven't written in a while. Lately I haven't felt much like going on the computer at all. I have had some more morning sickness since the last time I wrote but so far it hasnt been too bad. I'm definitely grateful that I don't get it everyday like some people do (I am SOOO sorry to those of you whom have to endure it everyday!!) Sorry guys I need to rant a bit, so this entry is going to be a longgggg one.
I did have to deal with a bit of a b!tch the other day that I had on my msn. She is the ex girlfriend of one of my ex boyfriends that I TRIED to stay friends with. She randomly added me one time after she talked to me from his. I didn't mind and had no problem talking to her. During my last pregnancy in which I had my miscarriage she flipped on me because I had put in my msn name that I had "lost the baby" just my wording for me having the miscarriage. She said "Your baby is not a set of keys, you didn't just lose it". I told her "I will word it the way I want...some doctors word it that way so whatever". She went all nuts on me because she had a miscarriage and thats what the doctors said to her and she didnt like how he said it. Anywaysss...she then went on to tell me that I had the miscarriage because I OBVIOUSLY wasnt ready to be a mom. She made me blow my top...I flipped and brought up her miscarriages (she had 3) thinking back on it I really shouldnt have but I mean I was mad and she did say I wasnt ready to be mom...seriously what does she know? I havent even met the girl. She eventually appologized and said it was just pregnancy hormones (I went with it because she did appologize so meh) Now a little about her. She has a son (whom she isnt with the father also NOT my ex) she is 32 wks pregnant with my ex's child (so 2 different fathers, 2 different children) She got pregnant with him within their first month together and he left her a few months in because she seriously has issues. I think she is 21 or 22 or something like that.
The other day I had ANOTHER know it all conversation with her (because she is pregnant she seriously thinks she knows everything) example being: during my last pregnancy she told me my boobs shouldnt be sore at 7 wks or whatever I was BECAUSE she didnt get sore boobs with her first child until she was 5 months or something. Ridiculous I know. I told her everybodys pregnancies and bodies are different.
This is the conversation I had with her.... I am the blue and she is the orange.
BABY GURL31 WEEKS PREGO DUE JULY 5TH IM HAVIN ANOTHER BOY says:
hi
BABY GURL31 WEEKS PREGO DUE JULY 5TH IM HAVIN ANOTHER BOY says:
i have a headace too today its horrible im hott as hell damn weather
BABY GURL31 WEEKS PREGO DUE JULY 5TH IM HAVIN ANOTHER BOY says:
i figure ur around the com ur on facebo Mommy MacPhee <3 [P.S. I love you.] *You are my everything says:
hi
Mommy MacPhee <3 [P.S. I love you.] *You are my everything says:
no i actually just layed down and then i heard msn bleep BABY GURL31 WEEKS PREGO DUE JULY 5TH IM HAVIN ANOTHER BOY says:
im sorry u can go lay back down then
BABY GURL31 WEEKS PREGO DUE JULY 5TH IM HAVIN ANOTHER BOY says:
if u did not want too be bothered turn your speakers off Mommy MacPhee <3 [P.S. I love you.] *You are my everything says:
its ok dont worry about it but i feel like im gonna get sick again
Mommy MacPhee <3 [P.S. I love you.] *You are my everything says:
they are off oddly enough Mommy MacPhee <3 [P.S. I love you.] *You are my everything says:
but for some reason it still bleeps BABY GURL31 WEEKS PREGO DUE JULY 5TH IM HAVIN ANOTHER BOY says:
ive already done that twice so far ' Mommy MacPhee <3 [P.S. I love you.] *You are my everything says:
its awful BABY GURL31 WEEKS PREGO DUE JULY 5TH IM HAVIN ANOTHER BOY says:
yup Mommy MacPhee <3 [P.S. I love you.] *You are my everything says:
i will talk to ya later BABY GURL31 WEEKS PREGO DUE JULY 5TH IM HAVIN ANOTHER BOY says:
just think im 31 weeks ur only 8 im huge in this hot weather Mommy MacPhee <3 [P.S. I love you.] *You are my everything says:
im gonna be fairly big by the summer so im gonna be pregnant during all the summer heat BABY GURL31 WEEKS PREGO DUE JULY 5TH IM HAVIN ANOTHER BOY says:
injoy ur nap sleep wile u can becuz when ur actually a mom u wont see much sleep for the first lil wilr Mommy MacPhee <3 [P.S. I love you.] *You are my everything says:
i know that BABY GURL31 WEEKS PREGO DUE JULY 5TH IM HAVIN ANOTHER BOY says:
u will be 4 months in the summer thats not that big ill be like 38 weeks when the real hot weather hits
BABY GURL31 WEEKS PREGO DUE JULY 5TH IM HAVIN ANOTHER BOY says:
ill be delivering a baby in the hotest month of summer Mommy MacPhee <3 [P.S. I love you.] *You are my everything says:
mmmhm BABY GURL31 WEEKS PREGO DUE JULY 5TH IM HAVIN ANOTHER BOY says:
u shouldent have u as mommy macphee yet ur not a mom ur only pregnant u need too have a baby too be a mom right now ur baby is not even compleatly formed
BABY GURL31 WEEKS PREGO DUE JULY 5TH IM HAVIN ANOTHER BOY says:
go ahead get mad take offence becuz i kno u are goin too Mommy MacPhee <3 [P.S. I love you.] *You are my everything says:
im still going to be a mom so im keeping it as that BABY GURL31 WEEKS PREGO DUE JULY 5TH IM HAVIN ANOTHER BOY says:
w/e Mommy MacPhee <3 [P.S. I love you.] *You are my everything says:
no one else ever says this kind of stuff to me if it was that much of a problem they would BABY GURL31 WEEKS PREGO DUE JULY 5TH IM HAVIN ANOTHER BOY says:
im not anyone else im outspen i tell people how it other people are alot nicer then i am i am a mom BABY GURL31 WEEKS PREGO DUE JULY 5TH IM HAVIN ANOTHER BOY says:
just think its not right of u too be calling urself mommy becuz u arent Mommy MacPhee <3 [P.S. I love you.] *You are my everything says:
i will do whatever i want
Mommy MacPhee <3 [P.S. I love you.] *You are my everything says:
ur not right telling me what to do all the time Mommy MacPhee <3 [P.S. I love you.] *You are my everything says:
shawn tells me to block u all the time but yet i keep u on here bc im trying to be nice BABY GURL31 WEEKS PREGO DUE JULY 5TH IM HAVIN ANOTHER BOY says:
w/e lady i stated my opion wich im intitled too block me if u want becuz i could care less wtf ur husb thinks of me
BABY GURL31 WEEKS PREGO DUE JULY 5TH IM HAVIN ANOTHER BOY says:
im not his wife im not fuckin him
BABY GURL31 WEEKS PREGO DUE JULY 5TH IM HAVIN ANOTHER BOY says:
i wouldent get married at 19 ty very much here ill do wut ur baby daddy wants ill deleate u too make him happy
BABY GURL31 WEEKS PREGO DUE JULY 5TH IM HAVIN ANOTHER BOY says:
hope u actually carry this baby bye
BABY GURL31 WEEKS PREGO DUE JULY 5TH IM HAVIN ANOTHER BOY says:
have a great life Mommy MacPhee <3 [P.S. I love you.] *You are my everything says:
i got married at 20 thankssss BABY GURL31 WEEKS PREGO DUE JULY 5TH IM HAVIN ANOTHER BOY says:
wtf ever
She seriously ticked me off. I am just like my mom and Keizer side of the family and I have a terrible temper when you get me going. I had so many things I could have said to her and wanted to say to her but my heart was pounding, my adrenaline rushing and my hands shaking...I figured it was better for baby if I stayed calm and didnt bother with her so after that I blocked and deleted her from msn and facebook. I was so sick of dealing with her know it all attitude I just couldnt handle it anymore.
Besides that little drama I have been pretty good. I have figured out what I am going to do for work. I went to college for 2 years and got my early childhood education diploma and did work for a daycare up until I had my miscarriage. I couldnt stay there any longer (I just wasnt happy, even my director noticed and said I needed to do what was right for me and my body...I was emotionally drained). I decided even with the baby on the way I don't feel like working at a daycare at this point. I have decided however, that I am going to take care/babysit whatever you want to call it in my apartment. Just 2 or 3 kids. I can be making 1200 a month, untaxed and whatever so I wont have to worry. I can stay home in my sweats, when I need to go to appointments I can without hassle and I can eat whenever I want. When the children nap I can also nap so I think it will be better for me. I am going to get a couple playpens, highchairs etc to have for them and will do similar stuff as in daycare...crafts, stories, teach them stuff etc. It wont be just like a 16 year old babysitting a child for a few hours. I have my CPR and food handlers course too so that is a big bonus. This is something I can also do once the baby comes (probbly not right away of course but a friend of mine did it and she started when her son was less than 6 months old...maybe 4 or something, this way I will be also making more than I would on maternity leave. My husband is very supportive and feels it would be better for me to do it this way and I definitely agree.
I will be 10wks on monday so the time is definitely starting to feel like its going a little faster. I have my next doctors appointment on June 9th (14wks exactly) and my 12wk ultrasound is May 28th and a day before my 21st birthday!! Yay!! Im actually not to excited about my birthday it just feels like another day to me and actually try to avoid the topic when Im with my in-laws. Not long ago Bill (shawns dad) said "someone has a birthday coming up!!" I was like "what? no I dont think" ughh...I think inside Im really excited but just not showing it yet. Today, shawns parents gave me a card for mothers day (our mothers day over here is May 11th) tomorrow and I was so excited...it definitely put a smile on my face. It was to an expectant mother which I thought was perfect!! Anyways, I better end this before I ramble forever. I will likely write more tomorrow!! xo
Last edited by wantababybump : 11-05-2008 at 01:20 AM.
So, I mentioned in a thread about "why chose the name you did for your little one" or something like that, that I had chosen the name Douglas to be in a boys name because of my biological father. The anniversary of his death is coming up so I thought it would be good for me to talk a little about him and our story.
My mom got pregnant with me when she was 15 years old and gave birth to me 9 days after her 16th birthday. My father (whom I will likely refer to as Douglas throughout this, not because I disrespect him or because Im mad at him but because I thought of him as more of an uncle than a dad). Douglas was also 15 and he was very immature. Mom had to grow up really fast because of the pregnancy but he seemed to stay just as immature as ever.
When I was born my mom tried to stay with him but it was just too hard on her because she needed him to be a father and he wasn't ready to stop being a kid. They ended up breaking up and she started dating his older brother (he was 7 years older than her) but she fell in love with him and they ended up getting married when she was 17 and gave birth to my brother when she was 18. So, this being said, my step father (whom I call dad and will refer to as dad through this) is really technically my uncle and my brother is my half brother/cousin.
It was a complicated mess, and Douglas hated and despised my mom for a very long time. (I honestly don't blame him) Ever since I could understand, I knew that Douglas was my real father and mom never told me otherwise she said she never wanted me to find out when I was older and then hate her so she never kept it from me. Douglas lived with his 2 brothers and my grandfather up until the day he died so whenever we would go over I would visit with them but more like he was my uncle than a dad. My stepfather raised me right from when I was a baby so that is why I call him dad.
I used to go over to Douglas' when I was 5 because my school was right next door so he used to babysit me after school and one of my fondest memories with him was when there was snow on the ground and him and I were playing in it and there was a huge snowbank that we made into an igloo...I crawled inside and I remember him sitting outside it with his hand in asking me if there was room for 2.
When I was around 9 I think I started wanting to actually refer to him as father and start getting to know him as a father and daughter. I also started to give him hugs and kisses before I left from visiting him. I decided to give him a fathers day present early because this was the first year I would have done it and I was so excited to see his face I just couldnt wait. So, mom took me to a flower shop and we bought him a beautiful bouquet in a mug that had a Tiger on the ouside along with information about Tigers on it. I gave it to him early and I will never forget the smile on his face when I handed it to him and said happy fathers day. My 10th birthday was also coming up just after that on May 29th but I will never ever forget the day of June 1st 1997.
We had just moved to where my great grandma used to live and we were renovating it while living there. June 1st seemed to be a dreary day and the air was cold and I just felt like there was something about this day that didnt feel right. My mom and dad's friend showed up (they called him Wog...I dont know what his real name was) but he seemed weird and went off to talk to mom and dad along with my uncle Dwayne who was with him. Finally, I seen mom crying and had no idea what was going on but Dwayne, mom and dad all left while Wog stayed with us for a while.
Dad finally returned later and said we needed to go to Musquodoboit so we got in the car and drove down there. Musquodoboit is where I grew up, we were going to Middle Musq. and we were living in Upper Musq. Anyways, we drove to my uncle Vernons, Dad got out of the car and made us wait in the car and went to his door. There was no answer and then he wrote him a note and stuck it to the door. He got back in the car and we drove up to the hospital which was 5 mins away. I thought it was so weird and I started to think maybe something happened to Vernon because we ended up driving back to his place again. Dad once again got out and went to the door but still no answer. I will never forget his face when he got back in the car.
He got back in the car with his tear filled eyes. I asked him if something happened to Vernon and he said no, that he had something to tell my brother and I. He then went on to tell me that Douglas had been in a canoeing accident and he had passed away. I broke down, my dad broke down and Justin broke down. We had just lost my father, dads brother, and my brothers uncle and there was nothing that could be done. It was one of the hardest times of my life and I went to sleep everynight hoping that when I woke we would go visit and he would be sitting on a chair in their house and say "fooled you" but he never did.
The funeral was very hard. I brought a school picture with me and wanted to put it in his hands in his casket but I was so young I couldnt do it alone. My dad got up and helped me. His funeral was a rainy day and everyone was mourning and crying and it was just so hard, especially when they lowered his casket into the ground and I knew I would never see him again.
I still find it hard to this day to go to his grave. I still cry here and there while I am alone. Over the years talking about his death has helped me overcome it and to this day I find it easier to talk about it now then I did back then. I miss him and it never felt right going to their house because when we did we expected to see him but he was never there.
My mom always told him that he would be there on my graduation day and that he would be there for my wedding. It just turned out it was in spirit not in actual body. It's kind of weird because he told my mom a few years before this that he was going to die by the time he turned 25. That he just had a feeling about it. He was right. He died June 1st 1997 and his 25th birthday was September 21st. We think he died before he hit the water (they say he drowned but the way the autopsy was written there is no way he could have) We actually think he may have had epilepsy and had a seizure, hit his head and died before he ended up in the water. He wouldnt get checked for epilepsy even though he had had seizures before. There was drinking involved also so that was definitely a factor.
On my graduation day alot of my pictures that I had developed had orbs in them. I really believe he was there that day and believe that these orbs in my pictures was him. One of the pictures was my whole graduating class and the orb in the picture was sitting right where I was sitting. I dont know some people may think Im crazy but I really felt the orbs meant something.
On my wedding day my dad walked me down the aisle but I know Douglas was there too. We got married at the church my mom and dad got married at and also where Douglas was burried. In his memory Shawn and I had pictures taken down by his grave. This is the reason I will have the name Douglas in my sons name if I have a boy. He may not have been there for me all the time but I loved him just as much.
This experience, along with the suicide of my boyfriend and his mother in grade 10 I believe has really helped me be the person I am today. I am a much stronger person because of it.
Thanks for reading if you have finished this whole thing. xo
Well, Im 10wks today yay!! Its starting to feel like time is going a little faster now instead of feeling like its standing still. Soon enough I will be going to my ultrasound appointment on May 28th and then having my birthday on the 29th!! June 9th I will be finally into Second tri so I am extra stoked for that as its just around the corner! My belly is starting to take shape now, I am definitely seeing more of a difference. Im going through a major dill pickle craving. I just opened the jar, not the sunday that just went by but the sunday before, and I finished the jar on friday lol. Shawn bought me a new jar today but they are "Our compliments" version and definitely arent as good as the Vlasic ones...they just dont have that CRUNCH and definitely dont taste as good. I may have to get him to get a new jar and maybe give that jar to his parents or something. We just had our mothers day yesterday and it was also my dads birthday so we went out to visit with them and they bought chinese food and cake!! So yummy!! Shawn came home from work with a "mother-to-be day" present...he bought a little handheld massager for me because I have been complaining of my back being sore...it was a cute gesture. I haven't been sick lately which is great!! Yay!! I really hate being sick and Im glad its passed for now.
I gotta go find some food now so Im gonna end my update! xo
Im going through a major dill pickle craving. I just opened the jar, not the sunday that just went by but the sunday before, and I finished the jar on friday lol. Shawn bought me a new jar today but they are "Our compliments" version and definitely arent as good as the Vlasic ones...they just dont have that CRUNCH 
and definitely dont taste as good. I may have to get him to get a new jar and maybe give that jar to his parents or something. We just had our mothers day yesterday and it was also my dads birthday so we went out to visit with them and they bought chinese food and cake!! So yummy!! Shawn came home from work with a "mother-to-be day" present...he bought a little handheld massager for me because I have been complaining of my back being sore...it was a cute gesture. I haven't been sick lately which is great!! Yay!! I really hate being sick and Im glad its passed for now. 
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