OK.. my hubby, bless his heart, says that i need to start pulling my weight around the house.. as i am suffering from horrendous MS... SO i can relate with you on that aspect.. i think for men they just get overwhelmed really fast and dont know how to cope... This baby was planned with us and so he is very excited about it...

I guess my thing with your hubby is that if he felt pressured to "father" a baby then why didnt he bring that up before you got pregnant??? i think its an excuse and he is just really overwhelmed...

best of luck Girl!!!

I think that maybe you should write him a letter . If hes being this unreasonable then chances are when you sit down to talk to him hes not going to be any better. Also when you write you can get more of your thoughts out because your not being interrupted.

I hope things get better, men freak out and DO NOT know how to deal with it, hopefully he will come around.

I don't know if this has been suggested yet, but have you considered hiring someone to help around the house? My husband and I both have demanding jobs, and we are busy all the time. Alot of my colleagues have suggested hiring a cleaning person to help around the house. We have not done that yet since we are still unpacking (we just bought a house Jan 1), but we have hired a handyman to do some repairs around the house. This has helped alot. I admit, I was reluctant to hire someone to do something that I feel like I could do, but the truth of the matter is that neither myself nor hubby have the time. Well, our time could be put to better use. This has helped us not feel stressed out....

My husband has also bought some books about fatherhood (and we are not even prego yet), but I remember he told me that in the book it said that some men have irrational thoughts that the baby is not theirs (even though they know that the OH was faithful). Sometimes it goes back to feelings of inferiority, jealousy, etc...

I also agree with the other people that suggested maybe trying to talk to him about you feel.

Wishing you a stress-less pregnancy.

I would have agreed with you a couple of days ago, but I have to say now that might not be the best idea.

Tiffanyyy, like some of the other women have said, he is probably struggling with the changes that are happening and doesn't know how to cope with them. This is not an excuse for his behaviour, just a reason. I know it may be hard for you to understand what he is feeling right now, as you are going through something totally different. Men are programmed to have the 'breadwinner' mentality, so all the monetary stress is being put upon him at this moment too. I'm sure he didn't know he would feel this way when you started trying to get pregnant. What he is doing right now is his way of coping with it. I'm not saying its right, but that's how he is doing it. I would either talk to him, or wirte him a letter, telling him how you feel. For some men, it may take a while for them to comprehend the fact that they are going to be a daddy. Good luck with whatever you decide to do. If you want, you can pm me, and I can share a personal story with you on my experience with this kind of reaction.

I have absolutely no experience with this whatsoever...but I just wanted to say, whatever you do, don't let him get you down. It's not your fault that your husband is feeling this way. What he's doing is verging on abuse, and you don't have to take that from him, especially in your current state, despite how upset he is.

I think it'll really help if you remember that it really isn't your fault. Try not to take it to heart and let it upset you, and I'm sure you'll get through it.

Hope you get this figured out. Wishing you the best. x

JMO and I'm in a rare mood at the moment...I think its a pretty shitty way for your husband to be acting. It would be one thing if you all were just dating and lived separately, serious but not too serious...but to be married, own a home, be financially secure, knowing your wife wants to have and raise children....Hello!?! What did he think was going to happen? It take two to tango and unless you were running around poking holes in condoms then he is just as much to point the finger at as you are for making the baby. So before he jumps on his horse about you "tricking" him, etc etc...he needs to realize that he is a grown man and makes decisions for himself so if he didn't want children then he shouldn't have helped you make one. My husband would be out the door, or I willingly would one, if he ever made a comment to me like that about our baby. It's just time for him to put on his big boy pants and become a daddy. End of discussion. (Sorry if this offended anyone, its just the way I feel personally about that...I've seen this scenario happen several times to close friends and I'm disgusted by the reaction that some men give when they find out they are going to be a daddy)

I agree 100%! You have been off the pill for a year and you had been trying for 6 months!!!! And now he wants you to terminate your pregnancy?! Truly unbelieveable! So sorry you are going through this.

i'd agree with the others, sounds like he's scared. not the best way of dealing with it but typical man!

My dh thinks i'm lazy too, i don't think they realise quite how hard looking after a house is! All i can suggest is if you can, just do the things that show, like the washing up etc. the unseen things we spend all day doing never get appreciated but the things they can see do!

If you can talk calmly to him see if you can find out if there's something else underlying worrying him - maybe he's just realised how much hard work having a child is! Or if there's one specific housework job he wants to see done.

It might not always seem fair (life never is) but if you want to stay with him and you love him, try to keep the peace, do as much as you can to keep him happy but don't be a doormat or let him make you ill.

hope you get it sorted.

Blimey... I can't believe how some of these men are behaving! They need a good word with themselves!

It could be that they're just feeling the strains of responsibility here and dreading the upheaval (and probable end) to their current carefree lifestyle. Particularly if you both have well paid jobs, lots of hols, go out often etc. etc.

Fear of the unknown can make many men throw a proper wobbly! I'd say give him a bit of time, but by no means let him off the hook if he's being a meanie!