Vent about my friend who is "TTC" - Page 3

lovehearts · Mar 1st, 2010, 05:23 AM

i would never do this to my OH. i really think its unfair to trap a man like that. It has to be a joint decisin if you want to bring a child in to this world. Such a shame. Wouldnt she rather wait until he wanted it too and then it would be an exciting thing - not a terrible one (which he may feel like that when she does fall pg)

Smiler13 · Mar 1st, 2010, 06:28 AM

The woman is obviously bang out of order, but what about the equal responsibility of men for contraception?

If men trust women they have just met - e.g. having a fling - who say that they are on the pill etc. then they are a being bit dim or cavalier about pregnancy and STDs. Clearly it's different in a long-term relationship, where there should be trust and honesty, but it sounds like your friend's behaviour is odd and should be setting off his warning bells!

Also agree with a couple of others that it is not your responsibility to tell the man - it is between him and his partner.

lottie7 · Mar 1st, 2010, 06:38 AM

That is dreadful, especially because he believes that she is on contraception.
I'm now fast forwarding 20 years........................If anybody tries to trap my Son in this way I would be so angry! If she has such a strong desire for a child she should get a sperm donor, someone who is consenting to becoming a father, she doesn't have to do it this way.
I'm not suprised you're cross, I would be too!

starangel27 · Mar 1st, 2010, 06:45 AM

i think its a terrable thing to do to a man, my friend done it a few years ago and her boyfriend really was not ready to have a baby they stayed togeather 1 year but as a result shes now a struggling mum who lives back at home with her parents and baby.

sugartush08 · Mar 1st, 2010, 08:20 AM

She sounds very immature! If she was an adult she would realize that that just may not be the man for her if does not want kids. People like this need to grow up!

Rikki · Mar 1st, 2010, 08:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Smiler13

The woman is obviously bang out of order, but what about the equal responsibility of men for contraception?

If men trust women they have just met - e.g. having a fling - who say that they are on the pill etc. then they are a being bit dim or cavalier about pregnancy and STDs. Clearly it's different in a long-term relationship, where there should be trust and honesty, but it sounds like your friend's behaviour is odd and should be setting off his warning bells!

Also agree with a couple of others that it is not your responsibility to tell the man - it is between him and his partner.

I completely agree. As Jeremy Kyle would say "if you don't want a child then put something on the end of it". Things can always go wrong. It's easy to forget a pill, or have a bout of sickness/diarrhoea or be on antibiotics. Not to mention diseases. No matter how much you trust someone, you can never trust the people they have slept with previously. It's equally the guys responsibility. As much as I don't like what this girl is doing, this guy should be protecting himself regardless.

Mar 1st, 2010, 05:23 AM	#21
lovehearts Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Aug 2009 Posts: 8,375	i would never do this to my OH. i really think its unfair to trap a man like that. It has to be a joint decisin if you want to bring a child in to this world. Such a shame. Wouldnt she rather wait until he wanted it too and then it would be an exciting thing - not a terrible one (which he may feel like that when she does fall pg)

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Mar 1st, 2010, 06:28 AM	#22
Smiler13 Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Surrey Posts: 496	The woman is obviously bang out of order, but what about the equal responsibility of men for contraception? If men trust women they have just met - e.g. having a fling - who say that they are on the pill etc. then they are a being bit dim or cavalier about pregnancy and STDs. Clearly it's different in a long-term relationship, where there should be trust and honesty, but it sounds like your friend's behaviour is odd and should be setting off his warning bells! Also agree with a couple of others that it is not your responsibility to tell the man - it is between him and his partner.

Status: Offline

Mar 1st, 2010, 06:38 AM	#23
lottie7 Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: Dec 2009 Posts: 411	That is dreadful, especially because he believes that she is on contraception. I'm now fast forwarding 20 years........................If anybody tries to trap my Son in this way I would be so angry! If she has such a strong desire for a child she should get a sperm donor, someone who is consenting to becoming a father, she doesn't have to do it this way. I'm not suprised you're cross, I would be too!

Status: Offline

Mar 1st, 2010, 06:45 AM	#24
starangel27 Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Durham Posts: 667	i think its a terrable thing to do to a man, my friend done it a few years ago and her boyfriend really was not ready to have a baby they stayed togeather 1 year but as a result shes now a struggling mum who lives back at home with her parents and baby.

Status: Offline

Mar 1st, 2010, 08:20 AM	#25
sugartush08 Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Ontario, Canada Posts: 223	She sounds very immature! If she was an adult she would realize that that just may not be the man for her if does not want kids. People like this need to grow up!

Status: Offline

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