I don't want to get into the porn issue, but the lying is the problem here, and while you were ill in hospital, I dunno I think his mind should have been on you and not getting aroused.

well said sweet!!! - I agree some of the posts seem a bit harsh. The girl was only asking for some advice. Maybe the posts aren't intended in the tone they come across but I would hate to think al4321 would be put off from B&B because of some of the replies on here as I personally have found this site and the advice and guidance from the ladies on here invaluable!

Please remember ladies if you cant say anything helpful on a subject then its perhaps best you avoid the thread and reply to threads that you can be helpful too.

i wouldnt mind my hubby looking at porn at the moment as sex hasnet been as frequent and at least if he just looking at it online or phone then he isnt getting it from another woman so if he needs porn sometimes then fair enough we all have needs its called being human.

I don't have any problem with my hubby watching porn. Men are visually stimulated, he's only looking not indulging with these women. He loves you. He's with you. You're having. Baby together, the biggest expression of love for any loving couple. Men love porn, girls love shoes and handbags. Fact.

Try not to worry about it. He's just a healthy guy- doesn't mean he finds you less attractive. Big hugs. Xxx

Thanks all for all of your opinions Im rather open minded (except for when it comes to porn + lies) so thanks for all your opinions whether they may have seemed a bit 'harsh' or not. Everyone is entitled and I expected all sorts of opinions hence the reason I made this thread in the first place

We are now ok....I admit I made him grovel a bit and now Im being pampered around the clock, which I was before, but even more so now HAve to make men suffer a bit for their mistakes

We have talked about it, he said the reason he didnt tell me was because he didn't want to hurt me or lose me (as I asked him ages and ages ago not to watch porn) You may all disagree with me on this but I think when you are with someone, then there should be no need for sexual pleasure by looking at other women/men, just arrousation by the partner. Stuck in my ways I suppose

He will not be doing this again as he knows he will lose me over this, I have said if I one day decide to want to watch it, then we will together

You may all not like how harsh I am about this subject but we are all different

Again thanks

i dont know really what to say or how i would react. I just wanted to say please dont stress yourself. Keep the channels of communication wide open.

I never really realised my opinions until I started in a serious relationship with my OH. I been with him since 16. Before I got with him, porn was never a problem, I knew men did it and because it had nothin to do with me it didnt bother me. I then got with OH, and sort of talked about it, I knew he had seen it before me, which didnt bother me, but he wasnt a user of it. As far as I know he doesnt use it. About 8 months into our relationship, he went to see a "comedy" show, I didnt mind, only wondered for a few secs why it was only a man thing (but ahh well just leave him to it). Turned out he had seen things that I think are really disgusting (basically a sex show). I wasnt impressed, it really bothered me after that, couldnt really trust him, (he didnt see the problem, which didnt help) I had sleepless nights for months afterwards. it does still bother me now but I have kind of got thru the worst of it. Some people this really wouldnt bother at all and I wish it wouldnt bother me!!!!! So since then, any type of porn or almost porn I have been really against, he knows if I found out anythin now about him seein porn or anythin I would fly off the handle, and would consider ending it (just because of the depression I had after the first incident). I do think it is over the top but its just how I am. I really do wish I could be like some of the girls on here and it not really bother me, but I really cant help it. Maybe im really insecure (no need really!). God knows.

I really dont know what I would do in ur case, maybe if it was the first time somethin like that had happened I may let it go and work thru it, but if he crossed the line after you tell him what you feel about it and stuff then it would be a bigger problem. Hope you manage to sort somethin out though xx

ahhh I should have known the problem would be sorted by the time I finished my post hahaha. But i do agree with you, its different for every couple, and if one of u dont like it and it would affect the relationship and it can be left out of the relationship, then thats how it should be

Ps. my OH cant really do it by himself either, says since he had sex with me its not the same and its not enuf so I shouldnt really worry as much as i do...!! xx

Haha thanks for your reply hun
Yeah well thats the thing its not even like our sex life isnt going good. He is only home friday - monday and boy do we make the most of it!! I guess he just got a bit horny on his own, and like women said it is better than him actually straying, we do all have our needs (I for one do) so call me a hypocrite! But one thing I do not is watch porn, and I would not do it, especially without him.

Anyways, he knows he is on his last chance now, he has never done anything like this before, and if he does it again with the lying then I will definitely consider ending it, as I like you bailey would feel depressed and unhappy.

May seem a bit selfish, but when Im with a man, I like all their attention on me and no other person