Hi ladies, I hope you are all ok today, I am feeling a bit low . I have been signed off work as I am being bullied by my managing Director, I think she wants to get me out of work so she doesnt have to pay any mat leave, I have also have an ectopic to deal with as well as a very lucky and beautiful baby bean which makes it all worth it!

I just wanted to ask a question. I have read on so many sites that the chance of miscarriage after you have seen a heartbeat drops drastically but then I read so many sad stories of ladies who have heard the heartbeat only to go on and miscarry a couple of days later??? I have very severe pain due to the ectopic breaking down and I get so scared cos I dont know if this pain is linked to that or linked to loosing bean? My 12 weeks scan (I will actually be 13 weeks) is coming up soon and I am bricking it, I just want to see a healthy babykins!

Ah I am driving myself mad, sorry for the long post, just so confused with everything at the moment, thanks for reading!

First things first...you need to report your boss. Either to a union or to a solicitor. Bullying of any description is wrong, let alone when you're pregnant. Do not let them get away with it. If they are trying to force you out because they do not want to pay the Mat Pay that's completely false. They get that paid for them by the government to the value of 104% so they actually make money out of you having a baby. Either way you need to get some legal advice...try the Citizens Advice or Unison they're both free. Forcing you out of a job is constructive dismissal. Pregnancy adds another aspect and it is completely illegal to dscrimate against you because you are pregnant.

Secondly...If you're worried about pain you should speak to your Dr. Chances are if you're already under their care they would be more than happy to follow up any concerns you may have. The chances are pretty slim once you've heard a heartbeat but a chance is still a chance I'm afraid. The best you can do is stay positive as stress is bad for baby. If baby has made it this far he/she is unlikely to give up without a fight. Have faith.

I hope that you're ok.

All the best hun.

Aimee

Thank you so much Aimee - Lou, that is great advice I am off to the citezens advice this week as you are right it is not fair at all, I am going to docs tomorrow to try and get signed off maybe just until the 2nd tri to make sure I am under the least amount of stress I can be so I may get him to check me over for the pain, I hope you are feeling ok too Aimee, thanks for your words of advice, it means the world. xx

You are more than welcome. Bullying is one of my pet peeves...I suffered from bullying at my previous job and my one regret is that I didn't take it further as now they are free to bully my replacement!

I really hope both things work out. Keep strong and I'll keep my fingers crossed.

I agree with Aimee-Lou - very well worded my dear! Congratulations on your very special sticky bean - good luck with your scan but it sounds like your bubba is determined to come in to this world xx

Ahh I really hope so, that is so wonderful to hear, I suppose there are no guarentees in this world and it is all about taking one step at a time, thanks for yor replies girls, it is true beani has been through alot aleady! I hope he/she is a strong one, it seems like it all I can do it wait to see how things pan out! I hope you are all ok! xx

Hi Ladies, I hope you are all well, just a quick update.

Woke up at 4.00am this morning is severe pain, took paracetomal which seemed to have helped, I am too scared to go to the loo so I am avoiding it like the plaugue, if the pain doesnt get any better I am going to have to go up to A&E (which is such a not nice place just wanted to have a bit of a moan, doc has signed me off for two weeks due to pain so at least I dont have to be at work, fingers crossed it is all ok! Lots of baby dust to everyone, have a good evening!

Aimee this is so well put, I completely agree with everything you have said. She needs to report this. I hope things work out hun.

Hi Hun

You sure you dont have urine infection because you can get pain with that? I would get your gp to check it for you or go to a&e hope everything goes ok for you hugs xx

Thanks gals, it seems to have settled again? I am going to make sure that I go up to A&E next time. I have a suspected ectopic aswell as beanie so that is what I am worried about most of all, Ill keep an eye on it, the doc has signed me off work for a while which is much better, less stress from the bullying! It sux that they think they can get away with it! I hope you girls are all doing well, i cant believe what a special place this is, its like having a group of friends to talk to about all your issues, thanks again!