I am terrified about telling my and my DB's families that I'm pregnant!! It wasn't planned of course...

Background Info: he has been dealing with a difficult divorce for quite a long time now but thankfully THAT'S almost over with... I am 22 (to be 23 in May), he is 27. He has a 3 1/2 yr old son that lives with us most of the time. I recently lost my job and health insurance (trying to get on Medicaid!)

Anyway, DB wants to tell everyone like right away!! We have told some friends but none of the family. I am just so nervous... I don't know how his mom will react, she can be kind of a b*tch at times. But I am more worried about my family. My mom is such a worrier and she can be extremely negative. Same with my maternal grandmother, who is also very religious! My stepdad is somewhat level-headed but I doubt he'll be thrilled. My dad and I aren't very close anymore so I have no idea what he will say. My paternal grandmother is more laid-back, mostly I think she'll be disappointed.

I think that's the main fear - that they will be disappointed in me.

DB and I have talked about marriage before, kind of vaguely - he knows I want it, he's just said he will need some time after his divorce, he doesn't know how long. I don't want him to marry me just because of the baby, but I knew I wanted to get married already, prior to finding out I was pregnant. But we are not engaged or anything, he gave me a "promise ring" sort of thing for Christmas though.

Has anyone else been in a similar situation? How long should I wait to tell them (like i said, he wants to do it now!!)? And HOW to go about telling them? Also in my family news spreads like wildfire, so once I tell one, everyone will know.

Hi hun,
my baby is planned but I'm also quite worried about telling my parents. My job situation is a bit uncertain at the moment and it's not definite that I'll have a job in September (which would mean huge financial pressure for us but we have talked about it and we would manage and actually I'm pretty confident that I will still have a job). But I know if I tell my parents they will not hide the fact that they think my timing is really bad, I know this is just because they will be worried, but my dad in particular is very blunt and will make his feelings very clear. I could even imagine him asking me if I intended to keep the baby!
They are visiting next weekend and OH was keen to tell them and tell his mum as well. But I think that I will wait until after I get the 12 week scan. After all so many things can go wrong at this stage, it doesn't seem worth all that hassle possibly for nothing. I saw my GP yesterday and she said she would advice to tell as few people as possible until after 12 weeks as there was a 20 % chance of m/c. I think I would also prefer to tell my family over the phone to give them a chance to get used to the idea rather than having to listen to them for the whole weekend! I have explained all my reasoning to OH and he has agreed. He was quite shocked that there is such a high risk of m/c in the early months and i think that was what convinced him to wait really, I pointed out how horrible it would be to have to go round 'untelling' everyone.
Sorry for the long waffle!!

Another one who is scared of telling family because of uncertainty in work, MY OH is due to start uni in September so I my whole family is dependent on my income, I'm currently on a temporary contract and need to leave before I can be made permanent, I was due to leave in 4 weeks and then come back in September, nut to try and qualify for some maternity my boss is hoping to keep me on all be it temporary until at least Christmas.
I'm also on a drug trial for my brittle asthma that was going well but has had to be suspended as the drug is not safe in pregnancy.
My parents did the whole you should have an abortion thing with Charlotte and I am dreading it again. I have decided not to tell them for as long as possible in case something goes wrong, but am still expecting the whole what are you doing with your life line once I tell them.