Why can't he understand?

Sarah88 · Jul 18th, 2008, 02:51 AM

I am over this. My OH just doesn't get it.

I can't control my sex drive. If I could, I would give myself one. I hate that I don't want sex, and I hate that I feel like it's all my fault. If anyone has any suggestions for increasing my libido then I would gladly try it.

I hate him trying every night for sex, and I hate that he makes me feel bad that I don't want it. It's not that he's pushy or a bad guy, it's just that he's a guy. Sigh.

nessajane · Jul 18th, 2008, 03:30 AM

men ey!! why cant they just understand

maybe you should try talking to him???

Sarah88 · Jul 18th, 2008, 03:57 AM

No matter how much I tell him that I can't help it, he still doesn't get it.

enigma · Jul 18th, 2008, 05:36 AM

I think hes being a bit tough on you, you must feel so heavy and tired.
Maybe offer hand and blow jobs(sorry if im to graphic).

claire roach · Jul 18th, 2008, 05:50 AM

mines the same we been arguing like mad over it, hes got adhd which dosent help we used to do it twice a day now id rather die than have it
he kinda understands BUT if i so much as show him any affection like kissing ect he trys it on, i feel like its easier 2 totally keep away from him.
im sick of arguing i wish i could lock myself away 4 the next 7 months untill its all over

Blob · Jul 18th, 2008, 06:09 AM

I'm kinda worried about that, as if i dont want it my OH pesters me, he doesnt think he's being nasty and doesnt MIND but just keeps on pushing.

sglascoe · Jul 18th, 2008, 06:27 AM

I know exactly what you mean, me and hubby have not had sex for about 3 months now (my fault i just dont want to), he is always hinting!!!

so last night i thought ok, he not gettin it for a very good while after baby, so put a smile back on his face again, so we did and it was not as bad as i thought (dont know what i thought it was going to be like, god we have been together for 10 years and this is our 4th baby).

anyway hubby is very happy this morning, cant do enough for me!!!!

he he glad i can still be a wife and not just a mother...

Beltane · Jul 18th, 2008, 08:45 AM

Sometimes if Im not in the mood, I'll agree to let him give me an oil massage with no expectations of sex afterwards. He only touches my back and shoulders and remains non-sexual. It's so relaxing and romantic that it can actually out me in the mood because I know Im controlling the situation. That and watching porn together is always fun!!

brownhairedmom · Jul 18th, 2008, 08:58 AM

I have a super high sex drive now but in first tri the thought of having sex literally made me gag.

Adam used to constantly push for sex, I just pushed him away and actually stopped cuddling or kissing him because he just wouldn't stop. I don't know what is wrong with guys, I wish there was some magic switch that would come on in their heads that just goes "ohhhh rightttt. She's pregnant, THIS is what its like"

mBLACK · Jul 18th, 2008, 10:46 AM

Sorry you're feeling this way! I know what you mean though, a couple of times I had sex out of pity for the guy and felt horrible afterwards.

Guys are just guys, I hate that they don't understand.
Maybe try using an excuse like, "There's a baby growing inside of me, it just doesn't feel right. Can't it wait?". Surely that's bound to turn him off?

Jul 18th, 2008, 02:51 AM	#1
Sarah88 Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Queensland, Australia Posts: 3,573	Why can't he understand? I am over this. My OH just doesn't get it. I can't control my sex drive. If I could, I would give myself one. I hate that I don't want sex, and I hate that I feel like it's all my fault. If anyone has any suggestions for increasing my libido then I would gladly try it. I hate him trying every night for sex, and I hate that he makes me feel bad that I don't want it. It's not that he's pushy or a bad guy, it's just that he's a guy. Sigh.

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Jul 18th, 2008, 03:30 AM	#2
nessajane Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Jul 2008 Posts: 7,586	men ey!! why cant they just understand maybe you should try talking to him???

Status: Offline

Jul 18th, 2008, 03:57 AM	#3
Sarah88 Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Queensland, Australia Posts: 3,573	No matter how much I tell him that I can't help it, he still doesn't get it.

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Jul 18th, 2008, 05:36 AM	#4
enigma Pregnant (Expecting) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: northwest Posts: 1,768	I think hes being a bit tough on you, you must feel so heavy and tired. Maybe offer hand and blow jobs(sorry if im to graphic).

Status: Offline

Jul 18th, 2008, 05:50 AM	#5
claire roach Other Active BnB Member Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Alabama Posts: 538	mines the same we been arguing like mad over it, hes got adhd which dosent help we used to do it twice a day now id rather die than have it he kinda understands BUT if i so much as show him any affection like kissing ect he trys it on, i feel like its easier 2 totally keep away from him. im sick of arguing i wish i could lock myself away 4 the next 7 months untill its all over

Status: Offline

Jul 18th, 2008, 06:09 AM	#6
Blob Mum (Mom) BnB Elite Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Scotland Posts: 12,735	I'm kinda worried about that, as if i dont want it my OH pesters me, he doesnt think he's being nasty and doesnt MIND but just keeps on pushing.

Status: Offline

Jul 18th, 2008, 06:27 AM	#7
sglascoe Mum (Mom) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: manchester Posts: 1,380	I know exactly what you mean, me and hubby have not had sex for about 3 months now (my fault i just dont want to), he is always hinting!!! so last night i thought ok, he not gettin it for a very good while after baby, so put a smile back on his face again, so we did and it was not as bad as i thought (dont know what i thought it was going to be like, god we have been together for 10 years and this is our 4th baby). anyway hubby is very happy this morning, cant do enough for me!!!! he he glad i can still be a wife and not just a mother...

Status: Offline

Jul 18th, 2008, 08:45 AM	#8
Beltane Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: May 2008 Location: Philadelphia, PA Posts: 4,384	Sometimes if Im not in the mood, I'll agree to let him give me an oil massage with no expectations of sex afterwards. He only touches my back and shoulders and remains non-sexual. It's so relaxing and romantic that it can actually out me in the mood because I know Im controlling the situation. That and watching porn together is always fun!!

Status: Offline

Jul 18th, 2008, 08:58 AM	#9
brownhairedmom Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Dec 2007 Posts: 6,444	I have a super high sex drive now but in first tri the thought of having sex literally made me gag. Adam used to constantly push for sex, I just pushed him away and actually stopped cuddling or kissing him because he just wouldn't stop. I don't know what is wrong with guys, I wish there was some magic switch that would come on in their heads that just goes "ohhhh rightttt. She's pregnant, THIS is what its like"

Status: Offline

Jul 18th, 2008, 10:46 AM	#10
mBLACK Mum (Mom) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Manitoba Posts: 2,350	Sorry you're feeling this way! I know what you mean though, a couple of times I had sex out of pity for the guy and felt horrible afterwards. Guys are just guys, I hate that they don't understand. Maybe try using an excuse like, "There's a baby growing inside of me, it just doesn't feel right. Can't it wait?". Surely that's bound to turn him off?

Status: Offline

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