LoraLoo, I can't even begin to imagine what you have gone through.

But I do think the OP is experiencing some sort of pre-natal depression and should seek help. This isn't the first time someone has been disappointed in the gender of their baby, and the feelings that go along with the disappointment for the OP is something real to them and she should definitely get medical help.

How brave some ladies are to ask for help with such difficult feelings, while I totally appreciate the feeling that trying for a baby shouldn't come with a gender preference and the strength of this feeling by ladies who have dealt with the worst disappointment in losing a baby, but I think everyone does have a preference on some level - whether its an attraction to beautiful girly clothes (the only thing that I will miss with having a boy) or a deep desire for a boy in a family with 5 girls like my best friend.

Logie please please seek some help, your feelings really do seem more than just 'blues' or an initial disappointment and if you get help now you could well avoid the post-natal depression you fear and have experienced before.

As for the thoughts that your baby will know - don't worry, until babies are born all they feel are instincts, not real thoughts. In fact I've read that children don't develop those kind of mental abilities until they are around 2, hence the 'terrible twos' when they become aware of the concept of self and the realisation that they aren't part of you but a spearate person.

As long as you get the help you need to be able to love and care for your baby when he arrives all will be fine. You've done the hardest bit in realising that your feelings aren't normal and have been brave enough to tell us. Good luck and fight for the help you need.

I can honestly say hand on heart I had no preference, we were TTC for so long and given just 0.25% chance of conceiving on Clomid due to us both having problems, we were two days off starting IVF when we got our . As long as we have a healthy baby we really didn't mind and over the moon to be having a boy. I totally understand people feeling the way they do though, maybe if we are very lucky to get blessed again I may feel differently, you will love your babies more then anything when you see them, take care XX

Exactly Dizzy!! I know people who have been TTC for 10 years with numerous miscarriages and now 7x failed IVF!! I can assure you they wouldn't be worried over the sex of their baby!!

Wanted to post here for ages!
Finally....

Deep inside I know that I would prefer another boy. And I am worried that I will be dissapointed if this bubba is a girl... But if it is a girl Ill gladly accept it as every child is a blessing

My heart is set on a girl...

Im hoping mines a girl but my gut instinct is telling me it's a boy..but Im still chuffed to bits!!

I really have always wanted a girl, and since we only want one child, I was nervous. From the beginning, I had a strong feeling it was a boy - and I found out that it was...This is it for us - so our situation is similar to yours. I still wish it were a girl, to get the bonding with her as a child and especially as an adult, but I try to focus on the advantages of a boy; plus, it always seems to be the boys who stick around their parents' home until their late 20's, early 30's, with the girls leaving asap (my mother always got along much better with my brother than myself). I'm really ok with it now! Never thought I would be...
I've joked that if we were to change our mind about having another one, we'd have to get the semen pre-screened for gender selection. Then again, I think for the kids, it's terrific to be of the same gender - they'll be best friends forever.
Please do go talk to someone about your feelings. I don't think they are unnatural, given how I used to feel; but you want to feel better for your own sake and your little ones.

It seeems i have caused a lot of resentment in what i have been saying. For this i apologise. I honestly wish i did not feel like this. I am trying to turn it round but every morning is a struggle. For those of you who have lost, i have too - a great many times. For me, i suppose this is another form of grief which i need to battle with. I am evil, I am vile but I can't help it. I need help. For those of you who have not judged, thank you so much and i am going to my doctor again next week. I know i must want this baby deep down as i have to inject myself every morning with clexane to keep the pregnancy going(painful is an understatement) so, to carry on doing this, i must be wanting it really. I just need to WANT to want it.