just a quick reply to this one about not being able to carry girls. i asked the doctor about this and she said that there is no medical proof whatsoever. it is more likely you cannot carry boys because they only have one of each chromosome. no one has ever been proven to be unable to carry girls - only boys.

i guess i sound like a very evil person. i have only ever had sisters (1 older one and 2 my age - triplets) and i keep remembering what a wonderful time we had - 4 girls together. i keep thinking of my 2 sons - how can they possibly be happy in the future when they don't have things to look forward to in the same way that i look forward to things as a woman? it sounds really stupid i know.
for those of you who want to find out the sex so that you are not disappointed at the birth, i would say don't. this week has been hell for me because i feel i can no longer enjoy the pregnancy - all the excitement has gone. i know i am slipping into pre natal depression because my thoughts are so irrational. everyone tells me i will feel differently when he is here and i pray that is right but i have another 20 weeks to wait. i look at other people who have 2 boys and they don't act like me - they are really happy. I just feel i am going to be judged by everyone for not having a girl. they are all going to feel sorry for me and pity me. what if my baby is feeling what i am feeling while he is inside me right now? how will i explain to him these suicidal thoughts? i need help. i need to love my baby again. can someone please just take these horrible thoughts away?

Logie68, that sounds worrying and much deeper than "disappointment". Do you have anyone who can offer real-time help over this? Midwife, GP? I am seeing a perinatal mental health worker, who I was referred to by my midwife and psychiatrist because of a long history of depression and related mental health stuff - there should be someone like that available to you. Prenatal depression is a big problem and I'm not saying talking to someone will be all it takes to get over how you feel about having a second little boy, but it might help, a bit.

Take care

my doc is allocating me a midwife this week. i could talk to my sisters but i feel they can't truly understand as they have a girl each. i feel worse in the mornings and try to cheer myself up by looking at the blue baby vests i have bought but to be honest, as soon as they leave my hands, i forget them.
i think i am scared too about doing the baby thing all over again because i had baby blues with Logan and don't want to go through that again after going through this. i think that this is just adding to my sadness.
my best friend has just had a boy and selfishly i am glad she didn;t have another girl as her daughter is pure perfection - gorgeous curls, beautiful and soo cute. i just keep thinking i no longer have the chance of having this. that's my life over.

i too think its something deeper than disappointment please speak to someone trusted, like your mw no one should judge you honey, you obviously don't want these feelings i do hope you feel better soon x x

Seriously- count yourself lucky you are having a healthy baby. I can understand the preference but saying that your life is over is just damn right fooking nasty- try having to say goodbye to your baby forever and you might know true disapointment. Im sorry if i sound harsh but you need to get a grip- you try for a BABY, not the sex of the baby, you have a 50/50 chance and if you arent prepared to take that chance, dont get pregnant.

lora i honestly cannot understand how hard it must be for you and all the angel mummies, big big x x x

Lora, I can understand why you would feel that way, and I can't imagine what it's like to lose a child, but I don't think that really helps Logie. Her disappointment is very real, and I don't think she should be made to feel guilty for it. As you can see, she has lost 7 pregnancies, she does know what it's like to lose a baby, and she is struggling with her feelings of disappointment and of guilt for feeling disappointed. Telling her to get a grip isn't exactly supportive. And I don't think it's at all acceptable to say that her honest feelings, which she has asked for HELP with, are 'damn right fooking nasty', even allowing for your understandable feelings.

Logie, I'm really worried that you might be suffering from prenatal depression, please please please see your GP and ask for help, or speak to your midwife as soon as you get assigned one. They won't judge you, and they will be able to find help for you.

Ahh this musta been the case for my mom!! I love learning stuff on this website hehe

Well for my dad more so as he is the one carrying the chromosomes lol