I know it's all a bit surreal isn't it. Once you've made the appointment you have to accept that you really are pg, and likewise face up to what has happened previous. I hate mother nature for making me doubt my ability and not enjoy my pregnancy like this!!

My symptons have really dropped off now and I'm worried because I'm not putting on any weight yet. Last time babs only made it to 8 1/2 weeks by which time I had put on several pounds and the time before that I remember being really concerned about my rapid weight gain. On the other hand I have been upping my exercise: done 5k walk and aquafit class and swam this week, so hopefully it's just compensating, but instead of being pleased about not getting even fatter, I'm just worried something's wrong!!! I thinkiI'm going to post this in 1st tri to see what sort of weight others are putting on. Back to symptons... I was really off colour with 1st sucessful pg for about a month and then pretty good after that so I'm holding on to the idea that it's good thing that my boobs aren't sore and I don't feel sick or even particularly hungry!!!?? How are you all feeling?

Hi Chilli

I feel completely different from before which I'm hoping is a good thing. I've just bought a doppler off Ebay, I'm hoping it's going to put my mind at rest and give me some confidence to book my appointments. Knowing me I'll pick up my own hb and be oblivious to whether bean is ok or not I suppose I'm just wanting a sign that everything could be ok before I commit to facing up to the scan.

My mmc I found out at 12+4 but looking at the scan pics on my maternity notes I couldn't make anything out everything was so small so I'm not sure how far along the pg ended.

x

I think I was lucky, the sonographer showed me my baby and gave me some photos. SHe told me it looked approx 8 1/2weeks. After hearing everyone's stories I'm so glad I had such a nice sensitive lady!!! I think when you have MMC you loose confidence as you never know whether LO is ok or not, it's an awful feeling always having that doubt when you know what it's like to go for weeks not realising things aren't ok, isn't it? Let me know how the dopler goes - don't think I should get one as would become completely obsessed!

I know what you mean about feeling completely different this time around. I too am hoping that this means baby is growing. A doppler sounds like a great idea, let me know if it works!
Chilli..there could be worse things for you to be obsessed with than hearing your little ones heartbeat!

As for me I am trying to compare my symptoms this time around to my earlier pregnancies but I am having trouble remembering as my daughters are 8 and 5! Making everything a little harder for me is the fact that I work in a Neonatal Intensive Care Unit and deal with the worst case scenarios everyday.

I know Coley, but I would want to be listening all the time, I'd never take it off!!??

I'm still tossing up the whole doppler, do I/don't I debate... being a bigger girl I understand it's going to be harder to hear the hb regardless and I don' twant to cause myself unneccesary stress. It's a toughie... I also think I'd get pretty obsessed about it and be listening every night.

oh have just spotted this
Hi girls i too feel guilty about posting in team angels and dont want to upset anyone but do want to know how the rest of us pregnant girls are getting on there's a few of us now,lets hope there will be plenty more to come.
Im in second Tri now but am so nervous i had my 12 week scan when i was 9 weeks so keep worrying encase there is something wrong now, i dont have my 20 week scan till 23rd july so its ages away.I have my 15 week midwife check up on friday and am so hoping she will check the heartbeat am not really sure what they check for when i see the midwife at my gp surgery do any off you know??
Glad your all doing well xxx

Hi Baby Buffy - good to see you found us! As I remember I think they start checking for heartbeat from now on so you should be reassured. I'm also having early scan at 9 weeks - just before you have you 20 week!! We don't get 12 week scans here (********) so we are having one done privately. Also hoping to make it to 24 weeks and have 3D video done... mustn't jump the gun yet though eh!! Friend had one done of her little boy and he clearly picks his nose

Hi Ladies

Just to let you know my doppler arrived yesterday and after a frustrating morning I resigned myself to the fact that it was too early to hear anything.

I checked with the other ladies who had one to make sure I was looking in the right place, waited until I had a full bladder and I managed to find it last night.

I have never been so excited and I was nearly wetting myself when OH got in from work I tried to find it and I think he thought I'd made it up but I found it again and we both just smiled.

I feel as though I have accomplished something new and I've got fingers and toes crossed that everything continues to be well.

For anyone debating getting I would definitely consider it but maybe wait until you are 11+ weeks as it was very difficult to find and I did get myself upset trying on the morning. I bought mine from ebay for less than £20 and used aloe vera gel which I had leftover from hols instead of buying gel.

xx

Yehay Lauren, that's great news - I''m so happy that you found HB.

Well I've had a couple of shockingly rubbish days - yesterday morning on the way to work I hit a deer full on and have totalled my car. Got to work and everyone is saying "well at least you're ok" not realising that actually I'm *****ing myself that the shock both physical & pyshological will have affected my baby. Today I'm exhausted and can't stop crying I'm so worried. To add to that OH was particulalrly horrible to me this morning and seems to think I'm making a lot of fuss about nothing. We are even discussing seperating.

Then at work yesterday they were collecting for flowers and a card for a woman who has had a small op and is off for 2 weeks and I'm feeling really hurt because I was off for 5 weeks, lost my child and had an op, and they didn't bother doing the same for me. Am I just very unpopular? oversensitive?
So yeah, all in all feel very low at the mo... and I know I should be on cloud 9 as I'm pg!!!