It does get easier hun, I honestly can't remember when it all changed but I think it was a gradual thing. The colic stopped, he slept a bit longer, I started to know what he wanted and he started to get interested in the world around him. I miss having a tiny baby in a way but once babies get their personalities all the hard work becomes worthwhile Now we have tantrums to contend with, but between the hard bits I get lots of cuddles and he tells me lots of very interesting things (mainly babbling with the odd word thrown in) Eventually things will settle down, baby will start going to bed at a regular time, you will get some "me time" back, and you will be able to eat again! I think taking him out for walks kept me sane x

I think the main thing that will make a difference is being able to get out. It is still early days for me (Abigail is 4 weeks old) but in the last two weeks we have been out to baby groups and classes, and we have done something every day. I am lucky as I have my parents nearby and my best friend with a baby down the road, but I am also meeting new people through going out and joining things, and although at the moment it is mostly small talk, I am hoping that over the next few weeks I will be able to start going out for coffee with some of the people I am meeting. I have found that having an appointment, class or meeting someone every day gives me a structure and a purpose to the day, and Abigail is also very settled when we are out and about in the pram, much more so than she is when I keep her at home all day. I would say as soon as you can, start getting out and meeting people, and then it is not all about you and baby, you feel like an adult again and you feel like normal life is still something you can take part in rather than something that everyone else is doing and you are left out of. if you lived near me I would take you out for a coffee!

Andbabymakes3 - Perfect! Exactly how I feel. Thanks everyone - am feeling so much better today. Tesearched local childrens centre - just 5 mins walk away and they do a baby group on fridays so will go to that. Also do other stuff, so I think I'll enrol in everything I can. Walked to get her weighed today and health visitor says I'm doing well and she's put on 2 lb in 3 weeks by BF alone, so really proud of that.

I've asked a friend to take me out next friday. Really lovely of her. OH was speaking to her and told her I was down so she volounteered her services - really great of her.

A friend of mine also said 12 weeks is the break point - so hopefully you're all right on that one. Haven't had a proper smile yet, but hopefully it's not too far off - agreed - I think that will make all the difference. She also slept until 3am from 10pm, so managed some sleep last night.

Have thought through my fears and the major ones are her crying in public - that scares me and also BFing in public. Just need to do those two and I'm laughing!

Idea of OH putting stuff in car is a very good one, and I've thought that if I can pop car seat into pram, wheel to car, then lift chair that little distance then again, there are possibilities.

thanks everyone - feel such a tart having such a bad time when so many have it worse, just feel so down soemtimes, then fine the next. Last night was hard (she screamed, then remebered I'd not infacoled her all day - so my fault. Have now written INFACOL on each boobie!!) but today is loads better. Going to walk miles tomorrow if this white shite stays away!!

You lot are my life line - each and every one of you!

Oh and OH - he is a star beyond belief. Does so much and still frets it's not enough. Dishwasher, washing, shop runs, gets us out when he can, changes nappies, baths her. He is an absolute star!

On the crying in public thing, I was dreading this too, then the other day she SCREAMED for 15 minutes in the chemist as I was waiting or a prescription, I needed the prescription so I couldn't leave and there was nowhere to sit so I couldn't feed her! It was actually fine, a couple of people made comments, but nice ones not nasty ones, and now it has happened and I know it is not the end of the world I know that I can cope if it happens again. The feeding in public thing I have only done with a friend who was also BF at the same time, we were in a cafe and it was fine. I think I will still be nervous doing it on my own for the first time.

It does get better. Little one is 13 months now but I remember feeling stuck in the house nearly crawling the walls!! I was so tired and had to sleep in between feeding and thought how on earth people can still manage to keep their eyes open at 8.35am and watch Lorraine kelly when I felt like sleeping!! I used to think "I used to be up and raring to go at 6.15am now I'm bloody knackered!" I was expressing milk as I couldn't breast feed so that tied me indoors for weeks. It then got easier around 3/4 months she was sleeping more and had more of a routine so I could go out to baby clubs and it was nice to talk to other mums who knew exactly how you felt and to get 5 minutes to sit and eat a sandwich. It got so much better so although it's easy for me to say it does get better. I had a good job too and decided to not to go back which is a decision I thought I wouldn't make but did, and now I couldn't be happier and feel lucky that I could do that. I still get stressed out moments but it's nice when dad comes in and he gets to spend time with her and I get chance to cook tea and we all sit and eat together before she goes to bed. I'm sure it'll get better:0) Best thing is to get out as much as you can and meet other mums who know exactly how you feel:0)

Cattia, thanks for that. Screaming in the chemist is something I must try - would be baptism by fire!! After that I imagine anything is possible. Feeding I shouldn't be scared of as I really do have the law on my side.

Oh Happygolucky - eating together - now that really does sound like something to look forward to!!!

Maral is - get out, feed out, allow her to scream if she wants - it's not criminal and join some groups. This will become my mission, but for now, (seeing as she is) I sleep!!!

The first baby is the hardest, it's the shock and the expectations you put on yourself. My advice right now would be

Leave the car seat in the car, you can carry her in and out or wheel her in and out in the pram.

Babies cry. If she cries when out, she cries, anyone who doesn't like it can feck off. Mostly though, when in a car seat or pram they don't actually cry that much unless they are hungry. Plan your journey/outing so you end up somewhere you can feed when she will be hungry.

Keep her changing bag stocked at all times so it's ready to pick up and go. Nappies, wipes, spare dummy if you use one, change of clothes, tube of bonjella, teether (if your like me, lip balm, purse with spare change/tenner, hair brush). Keep a spare blanket in the car too. As you are BF you won't even have to pack a bottle (or if you do, it's easy to add).

Make a point of getting up and getting dressed, even put a bit of make up on, it will make you feel so much more human! It sounds hard but if you get into the habit of doing it, it will be easier. It takes me 5 mins to get dressed, then another 5 to brush teeth and put make up on in the morning (and I have 3, 2 to go to school/nursery and a baby robot). BUT, I am a PJ snob, sitting jammies all day makes me tired so I refuse to do it.

It does get easier because you stop worrying so much and start to just go with the flow.

As I said, I have no choice but to get up and out, I have 1 child at school and 1 at nursery in the next town, no famil or friends here who can take them and a husband at work. I was driving 2 weeks after I had her (which you can do so long as your insurance says it's ok and so does your doctor. Good idea to make sure you can do an emergency stop and turn round to reverse etc first). I still can't lift the car seat though.

Angelstardust - thank you. Wise words indeed, and yes, carseat can stay in the car with her just popping in and out. She does tend to stay quieter for longer in the car seat though, so am giving OH the task of coming up with something to slide it from car to pram and vice versa. Getting dressed - oh yes - BIG effect. Forced myself this morning to get up and have wash and dress in normal non slouching clothes. (had to go out at 1, so knew 9 o'clock ay be my last opportunity)!! Only had enough time for a flannel body wash as she was needing attention, but felt oh so much more human. How the hell do you do it with 3??? I'm sure some of you are slightly crazy!!! Have told other half that if he wants another then we can adopt one at the age of 4-6 years old. Almost very serious about that and not entirely joking!!
Today has been good and still is going well, so lets see what tomorrow brings!!

everyone understands when a newborn crys in public and ule get alot of awwwws

its when they get to be a toddler ppl stare and give u evils im feel like screaming hes only 1 u idiots.

we all have times where we feel like we r going mad and are about to pop so when zane was newborn wed tend to go out for walks around town most days but i bottled fed at that point only lasted a week on the boob