Thought I'd ask in here for opinions...

According to all the books etc babies need to sleep for x amount of hours a day. Ilana sleeps for 10-11 hours at night usually (not always!). During the day though she hates to nap! She can sleep for an hour or more in the sling after whinging as I put her in it, but in her hammock it's 40 minutes tops, 20 recently. This can be after 20 minutes of getting her to sleep in the first place! She cries and cries and only sshing her and bouncing the hammock helps and gets her to sleep. A feed also works but I try not to feed her to sleep. She is tired though and needs to sleep.

I tried the baby whisperer etc but found it jarred with me a bit... She hates being swaddled, hated it when I sat with her like it suggests, and I can't pat her in her hammock. I'm in 2 minds - 1 says I'm so lucky with her night sleeps and she's so young that maybe I should just let her sleep in the sling or on me after a feed and when she's ready she'll sleep alone. The other (which my mum and half the world says to me too) says that I need to teach her to sleep alone and letting her sleep in the sling or after a feed is making a rod for my back.

Is it bad to feed her to sleep if she's already sleeping through? (At night she has a bath and then feeds for up to 2 hours, then I try to wake her a bit before she goes in her hammock so she learns to self-settle, and sometimes she will wake after half an hour or so and need to be shhed back to sleep)

If I sling her to sleep for now will she ever learn to sleep alone in the day? Anyone got experience of this?

Am I damaging her by not helping her to get 15-20 hours of sleep a day, or whatever they say she should be getting?

Any thoughts? Particularly from anyone whose child used to hate sleeping alone during the day but grew into it/was taught?

Is she tired during the day and resisting naps or just not wanting to nap?

I nearly always feed Freya to sleep and she can self settle fine if she wakes in the night.

I would let her sleep how and where she wants for the time being, as she is still young.

You could try different positions, like on her side etc.

Thanks Kirsten... She seems tired when I try to get her to nap. I've tried catching her at the earliest sign, leaving it longer... Nothing seems to help! Maybe I'll try feeding ehr to sleep. I just had it in my head from all the 'experts' that I shouldn't.

Are you breast or formula feeding? I don't see feeding to sleep as a problem at this age. Especially if you are BFing.

I'm BFing exclusively. She won't take ebm from anything - cup, pipette, syringe, bottle! When I go back to work (she'll be almost 5 months) I'm worrieed husband will struggle to get her to sleep (assuming she even takes a bottle by then!)

Tabs refused to take a bottle too, i have to use beakers and not ones that they have to suck only the free flow ones

I used to just let Tabs sleep when she wanted to, also i have always gone with the theory of not waking a sleeping baby I've also always fed Tabs to sleep, although i'm not going to do that again as i cant get her to sleep any other way even now

Hi, I just went with Sofia's flow, let her guide me and she found her own routine in regards to naps. I used to always hold her or take her out in her sling for her naps when she was little, between 2 and 3 months I started putting her in her cot and she suddenly decided she liked sleeping in there. Before I'd had to put her on our bed because she refused the cot, have you tried that? Think she liked the smell.

Sofia always goes down awake, but she still won't self-settle in the night, so putting her down awake hasn't made any difference for her. I've never intentionally fed her to sleep, she did used to fall asleep feeding when she was newborn but hasn't done that for a long time - again I think between 2 and 3 months.

Must be difficult when you're having to worry about going back to work I know every baby is different, but me just letting Sofia do what she was happy with has worked for us in the end.

I agree, just do what she is happy doing. She will change in a matter of weeks anyway, and then again, and again! They are never the same for very long when it comes to feeding and sleep, lol.

true! She always falls asleep on the boob in the evening but I think she's just relaxing and enjoying the boob... During the day she normally only falls asleep on the boob if she's knackered! I think I'll make sure we go for a long walk each day with the sling for now sop she gets at least one good nap a day, and then play the others by ear. Thank you for the reassurance!

She just went down after a looong feed and I couldn't wake her before I put ehr in her cot - then woke up squeaking and after 20 minutes! She just needed me to be there to go back to sleep, bless her.

I think I just find it hard to ignore all the 'my baby sleeps on its own at 9am, 1pm and 3.30pm for 1 1/2 hours each time' mummies... I need more confidence in my mummying.

I know hun its hard, my OH stresses me out as he thinks she should be perfect and i keep trying to say that its normal.