Welcome to BabyandBump's Miscarriage & Loss Support Forum - A support forum to talk & ask advice about your losses & miscarriages. This thread is called 'I'm a freak!!!' and is in our Trying To Conceive Forums section. |
Jul 13th, 2008, 04:11 AM
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#1 | | Super Auntie to 3 Active BnB Member
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I'm Currently Feeling: | I'm a freak!!! Well ladies it's been about a month now since my mc. One of my close friends is 6mths pg and I have been avoiding her for obvious reasons. I did let her know when the mc happened that I would be lying low for awhile and I hope she understood and she's been fabulous about it. Well today I finally plucked the courage to call her and see how she's doing, how things are going etc. It was a really nice to talk to her again, lots of small talk and catch up stuff.
Any way, the freak part... So she wants to drop off some things for the boys that she's cleaned out of her teenage boys closet, so I agreed. The freak part is that while she was here I couldn't stop being weirded out by her bump. It was like talking to someone with a wart on their nose... you try not to stare but you do unwillingly anyway. I think at one point she actually caught me.  I'm just standing there having this out of body experiance, thinking 'I wish that were me' and 'stop looking at her you weird woman'. I tell you I'm a total nut job!!
I expected to be completly fine with her, and I was totally caught off gaurd by my emotions. Last mc I had I was so jealous/mad of pg women I couldn't even stand to see them in public, it would just send me off. But this time, it's just like a longing a totally different kind of jealousy that I didn't count on.
All is well, I'm dealing, focusing on my goals and not getting down about it. It's just one of those weird parts of the process though that you don't realize how mc effects you... even after you've had one, it still sneaks up on you from time to time.
Lots of hugs girls. 
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Jul 13th, 2008, 04:23 AM
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#2 | | Mother of one Active BnB Member
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I'm Currently Feeling: | I am sure it will get better with time... I know when we were ttc and my best friend got pregnant, I got jealous but I got over it, but I know a little how you feel minus the m/c part...  GOod Luck!! | | | | Status: Offline
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Jul 13th, 2008, 10:40 AM
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#3 | | Waiting To Try (WTT) Active BnB Member
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I'm Currently Feeling: | I completely understand that. I know i stare at pregnant women who pass me by, i can't help it. It's like i'm drawn to their bump.
Friends of mine have recently had a baby and when we went round with a gift i was actually jealous that she had all her friends round looking at the new baby and telling their eldest how lucky she is to have a new baby brother, i just thought "it's not fair, i want that to be us" i felt awful though she is such a great friend. to you hun  | | | | Status: Offline
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Jul 13th, 2008, 11:29 AM
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#4 | | Pregnant with no.4 Active BnB Member
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I'm Currently Feeling: | I do exactly the same thing!! The trouble is theres bumps everywhere I go, so I keep bumping into things/people  | | | | Status: Offline
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Jul 13th, 2008, 14:06 PM
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#5 | | Pregnant (Expecting) Active BnB Member
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I'm Currently Feeling: | hi superp123, had really similar experiences to you - so just wanted to post to let you know it's totally normal..... unless it's just us 2 of course!
I saw the world in pregnancy bumps, prams and babies for a long time. It slowly stopped being so 'in your face' for me....
Sending hugs - you do whatever you need to do hun. xx | | | | Status: Offline
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Jul 13th, 2008, 15:28 PM
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#6 | | TTC after MC Feb 08 Chat Happy BnB Member
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I'm Currently Feeling: | I totally agree with everyone else. You're not a freak!!  In fact there's a woman at work who i overheard in the lift saying she's due in September. That was when i was due. I cannot help to think everytime i see her- which is luckily very seldom- that should have been me!
Ah, well.. one just moves on and i just embrace all the feelings i have since i think they're only normal.. although i dont tell anyone about it but OH, mum and you guys- cause you guys all understand!
Big hugs to ya, sweetie,
Omi xxx | | | | Status: Offline
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Jul 14th, 2008, 00:34 AM
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#7 | | Super Auntie to 3 Active BnB Member
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I'm Currently Feeling: | Quote:
Originally Posted by Freya hi superp123, had really similar experiences to you - so just wanted to post to let you know it's totally normal..... unless it's just us 2 of course!
I saw the world in pregnancy bumps, prams and babies for a long time. It slowly stopped being so 'in your face' for me....
Sending hugs - you do whatever you need to do hun. xx | OMG, That's exactly it... "seeing the world in bumps, prams and babies"! Today I went to the Zoo with the boys and DH and TONS of pg women everywhere. I never realized how many there are in the world at any given moment. LOL
Any way, I'm just keeping on keepin' on, gonna drop this spare tire and get knocked up. ASAP!!!
Thanks for putting it into words for me, it helps so much that there are other women out there who know and understand me perfectly. Thanks thanks, thanks, I don't know what I'd do w/o all of you. 
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Jul 14th, 2008, 01:50 AM
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#8 | | mad cat wifey! BnB Addict
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| I understand huni, it's the things that you aren't prepared for sting the most. One of the things that got me was after my 2nd MC I was sat outside the chemist and a baby boy was out in his pram with his dad and mam, and the baby gave me a huge smile...and I really had to fight back the tears. Your friend would have understood though sweetie  | | | | Status: Offline
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Jul 14th, 2008, 08:26 AM
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#9 | | Pregnant (Expecting) Active BnB Member
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I'm Currently Feeling: | I'm with you there, everyone else is pregnant aren't they?? I have 18, yes 18 friends who are currently pregnant!!! It hurts to see them and one of my closest friends has the same EDD that I had 25th Nov. So She had her 20 week scan the other day and she didn't find out the sex and she felt she couldn't tell me that she had had the scan. One other is having a section this Friday so I will have my phone with me all day so I can find out quickly!! I need to live vicariously through them right now and I couldn't be without them all!! I hope that makes sense xxx | | | | Status: Offline
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Jul 14th, 2008, 11:13 AM
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#10 | | ttc after mc..... Chat Happy BnB Member
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I'm Currently Feeling: | you're not a freak! and even if you are, then all of us here are! perfectly natural....i guess it is the way that the human mind notices things.....
3 months on, and i get very envious of others still......my friend even showed me her bump the other day (she doesn't know i had a mc)....she's 30 weeks and not a stretch mark in sight either!  | | | | Status: Offline
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