todteach

I had a d and c on May 18th, because of a missed miscarriage. I was 12 weeks pregnant. I ended up with an infection and was put on antibiotics and had a second d and c on May 29th, due to retained products (attached clots) that weren't removed by the first d and c.

Now I have a low grade fever, and am still tired and dizzy. I went to emergency on Friday. The Ob/Gyn who did my second d and c saw me.... He said that a temp of 100.7 degrees celcius is not that high, and that I should be fine, if I just take some tylenol to bring down the fever. I explained to him that when I had a smaller fever, I had a major uterus infection. He didn't seem concerned.

I'm wondering if I should go back for a second opinion. I still don't feel like myself (physically), and emotionally I'm a wreck.

He also asked me (because I was crying) what was wrong. Hello! I had a miscarriage Einstein. He was the doctor who performed my second d and c.

I told him that I'm having a difficult time, especially at work, because I work with toddlers at a daycare centre. He asked me WHY I was having a hard time. I told him because I'm sad. He said "Oh well, just wait for your next period and try again, then come see me."

Seriously......the reason that I went to emerg was to get another dose of antibiotics because the last dose did not clear the infection. I didn't go there to be critisized for grieving.

ahhh! Sorry about the vent, I'm just frustrated and don't know what to do.

Thanks

NikiJJones

How can these doctors be so awful?? I had similar when I was in hospital after MC. Told me to stop crying as it happened to lots of other women and just try again. So insensitive. Sorry you had to put up with him!!!
As far as the medical side goes, your temperature does sound very high. If you can get a second opinion, then I would do. The emotional pain is awful enough, without being physically unwell too.
Sending you and more .
I'm here if you need to chat.
xxxx

shmoo75

Oh hun I am so sorry for your loss. That horrible male doctor some men have no common sense what so ever or feelings!!!!! How dare he?! I would def go and get a 2nd opinon the fact that you had to have a 2nd d&c because, they didn't get it right the 1st time speaks volumes. What a horrible experiance you had to go through and to top it all you had to have the most insensitive Dr see you. If you get him again I would ask for someone else and explain that he is an insenstive pig and should re-consider his career choice!

Logiebear

That is awful hun, I would see another Dr. Some people don't understand the grieving process for a baby that you never knew. It can be terrible talking to some one who doesn't understand. I hope you feel better soon hun xxx

todteach

Thank you everyone for your replies. I waited out the weekend, until my doctor's office was open. I'm sorry for everything that you are all experiencing too.

Yesterday I went to my own doctor.

She told me that I have a viral infection, unrelated to my surgeries. Probably something that I have picked up from my kids at work, since my immune system is down. Took me off of work for the rest of the week and gave me some meds to help me sleep. I've been waking up with panic attacks.

However, I'm a little hesitant to take them. I have not started taking them yet. After speaking with the pharmacist, I'm understanding that they can become addictive. Anyone been on Ativan? I have never taken anything like this before. It's to releave anxiety (an antidepressant). Obviously, I don't want to become "hooked". We are also planning on trying again, hopefully this month (just got my af yesterday after dr. appt.) I don't want any meds in my system when we do.

Thanks
Lots of love

NikiJJones

Hi Todteach,
You need a good rest to get the virus out of your system. I went down with a stinking cold after my MC due to low immune system.
My doc also offered me sleeping tablets, as I was like you: dreadful panic attacks at night time, but I resisted them, as I'm keen to keep chemicals out of my system for trying again. I drank Chamomile tea, and used Bach Flower Rescue Remedy which is safe to take even if PG. Wish I could give you a big hug, as I know how awful it is to wake in the night with all of this on your mind.

xxxx

todteach

Thanks NikiJJones. I wish I could give you a big hug back.

I think that I'll try the natural teas too. I hate to even take advil or tylenol, unless I really need it.

I would just like to be a little happier. A little more "back to my old self". I'm still breaking down.....often.

Work has been a nightmare, although my coworkers are very empathetic. We have 4 coworkers and 6 daycare parents expecting. It's just hard to digest. Let alone, insensitive "friends" telling me that "it was only my first try", and asking if my uterus is too damaged to have children. I was three months pregnant. I know that they just don't understand but it is hard to listen to.


I just want a little bit of me back.

Big
Thanks

NikiJJones

I know what you mean. I feel like some part of me: the part that used to smile and feel happy, has just gone for good. I still cry lots, but even when I'm not crying I feel like there is a big shadow over everything. Night time is the worst for me. All seems so much worse in the dark doesn't it, and I can't keep on waking OH up to comfort me when he's got to work the next day.
I'm still off sick, but back to teaching next week. Several of the other teachers and loads of the Mums are pregnant too, and I am dreading it. I'm only doing 2.5 days next week as my headteacher has been very kind to me, but it will still be hard. Don't think I'll dare go into the staff room. I don't want anyone to ask me about it or even show sympathy.
So sorry to hear that you're also finding work tough. You could do without the insenstive comments too. I've had a few of them already, but expecting a whole load more once I get back.
Lots of and give the Bach Rescue Remedy a go. It is not as good as chemical sleepers, but does calm you down.
xxxx