Well this is now my third miscarriage in three months and I can't take it any more. I have wanted a child for so many years and I can't manage to keep a baby in my womb. I told myself I wouldn't get excited this time but the tests were so strong and symptoms were progressing well but still my body expels the embryo. I haven't even started bleeding heavily yet. I just want it over with. Don't know whether to go into hospital and see if they can do anything to speed it along. The pain is unbearable and I just keep crying. And it's bl00dy Valentines Day! In December it was the day after my 30th, last month at least we made it past New Years. I don't know what to do. We were waiting on our FS appt anyway but what's the point in having IVF if I am just going to spontaneously abort it anyway. What's the point in anything. We're trying to get our flat ready to sell to buy a family home but it's just going to be empty. Nothing seems to go right for me. My health is a mess, my insides are stuck together with endo, I have had to stop my teaching course because I am in constant pain, I have no income, living off my husband's salary alone. I feel so useless I can't do anything right. What's the point in trying to have anything good in my life. I feel like telling my DH to find someone else who can have a career, go out and have fun and give him a baby. I can't do any of these things.

Hi fifi, so sorry for your losses, and that you are feeling so low.

Please do go and get checked out at your local early pregnancy unit or A&E if the pain continues, e.g. to rule out ectopic pregnancy.

After three miscarriages they should investigate, in addition to any more general fertility tests. There are a lot of tests that they can do on the NHS, e.g. blood tests. The ladies on the (sticky) recurrent miscarriage thread are really helpful and supportive.

You are NOT useless. You have been through a lot.

Bet your DH doesn't want anyone else, am sure he loves you and wants to help.

Again, sorry you are going through this. Take care.

So sorry hunni, take care xxx

lots of hugs

fifi; its not your fault. You should get your endometritis looked into just to make sure it isn't a factor in this and ask for tests to rule anything else out as well; it could be nothing and just 'bad luck' but you never know until you look into it. You're not a failure and your OH is NOT better off with someone else, please speak to him about this don't bottle it up inside.

Thanks girls. I ended up at Gynae ward last night because had bad left sided pain and haven't actually started bleeding properly. Doc I saw was a patronising cow who actually suggested I wasn't pregnant in the first place! Til I told her I had 6 pos tests. Heard her on the phone to the proper gynae as I was shoved back to the waiting room and suddenly I was to go for scan today and see someone in gynae triage. Kind of hoping they will see something and actually do something. Can't stand waiting for m/c to happen properly.
DH is being a star, I keep telling him it's ok to be sad but he says his way of coping is to support me. I just keep crying. If anyone else tells me it was really early I may hit them. I know the baby was only a cluster of cells but it was our baby. Had to phone my GP to tell him not to send the referral to the midwife. I'm so sore and tired and fed up. Feel like there's no point trying any more. My consultant said she didn't want to do another lap when I saw her in December but I know that my endo has got worse. HOping the scan today throws up something. Is it bad that I actually want it to be ectopic? Does anyone understand what I mean?

Sorry you're having such a hard time!

I know most people want to rush back into a pregnancy (I did and still would if I could). The doctor told me to wait a couple of months so tissues could regenerate properly, and the people at the blood donor program have told me to wait 6 months before I donate again!!
I know many people get pregnant with no wait, but everybody is different. Maybe your body needs a bit more time. You could perhaps give it a wee break while things are investigated... Just an idea, of course!

What do you mean by "my insides are stuck together with endo"? Asherman's/scarring? Endometriosis? In any case... having one condition doesn't mean being "useless" and things can be done about such things. Good luck!!!

What I mean is my right ovary is stuck to my pelvis with adhesions/scar tissue from repeated ovarian cysts. I have endo on my ovaries, bladder, uterus, pouch of douglas, left ovary is joining in the party it feels like. My consultant doesn't want to do another laparoscopy as it increases the risk on scar tissue. The endo didn't respond to the menopause injections I was on, it grew whilst I was menopausal. Basically the endo is really agressive and I think it is probably causing the m/cs as endo deposits can interfere with early pregnancy, sending out hormones to tell the body to shed the endometrial cells, which would explain why I can't get past 5 weeks.
It is so frustrating waiting to see my consultant we can't see her until April. Not sure what she will suggest as we can obviously conceive. We are taking a break for at least one month as getting pregnant for 3 months in a row obviously didn't do anything for the thickness of my lining if the light bleeding is anything to go by. Scan showed a thin lining and no cysts (although I have had cysts which haven't shown on ultrasound before). The pain I was having is probably just my endo getting worse.
I am feeling a bit brighter in myself. I have been focusing on getting our flat ready to sell and catching up with friends (trying not to wallow in the pain and isolate myself). Seeing pregnant women and little babies when I am out is still really difficult. And if I am still not pregnant when SIL has her second in July I don't know how I will react. It's been tough speaking to my 2yr old niece on the phone but she adores me and I can't not speak to her as she is a little sweetie and it's not her fault we keep miscarrying.
OK I am totally waffling nonsense.
Thanks girls.

Sorry you're having such a hard time, Fifi-folle!

With so many issues it's no surprise you mc I think you're right in distracting yourself until April when you can see someone. I hope they then move quickly to help you out!! Do they seem to be taking it seriously? Doctors seem so blasé about many of these things...

Best wishes!!

My new consultant saw me in Dec when I was preg first time and said she would see us in the fertility clinic if I miscarried. Usually where I live you have to wait til you have been trying for 18 months but because of my endo we are getting help sooner so for once my endo is being useful!