I had a bump aswell i think its harder having it, i havnt stopped eating since it happened the bumps gone now just a big jelly belly but its terrifying to have incase someone says omg your bumps getting big or something like that, a double insult of losing my baby and being called fat at the same time. I have a question for you both actually since i know your both around the same age as me, how do you deal with the fact you cant try again for years? thats the part that really gets me, knowing im going to have to wait

When i found out I was pregnant, i had really bad habbits, i smoked like a freak train cause im always stressed out, and i have had alot of eating disorders in my life, i understand its scary, but the way my mom puts it for me, is.. wait till your ready again and you don't have to stress.. i mean, everything is ment to happen for a reason, the doctors scared me by telling me at 2 months, my child was going to be mentally challenged, which made me feel GREAT grief, and then it died because it just wasnt working properly, so i take it as a gift, my one and only for now! <33 and that baby will me the world to me untill i die... it's somethin that is hard to even think about, i don't think I even want other children, this one was my everything.

well i guess i dont deal with it. I just try not to think about it i still have that ache to hold a baby and have one in my arms but i keep distracted...
For me if it happens it happens ill always regard J as my first and Baby Taylor (we havnt a name so i named it Taylor after OH surname) as my second...

How are you both coping? My tum was pretty big with jamie cos she was a biggggg bubba everyone kept asking me when she was due when i got back to school...even though theyd all been told not to mention it!
x

Ceexo i was the same, 6 years of treatment for bulimia and no end to it in sight then i got that bfp and everything changed, i couldnt bare to do it anymore.Rowan helped me in a way that no doctor/specialist/hospital could and i'll always be grateful to him for helping me see there was a way out of it all.I also smoked a lot before i got my bfp, stopped when i found out but unfortunatly when i lost him i went straight back to that bad habit.Still i know i can quit now and thats helpful.The idea that your baby was your one and only is a lovely way to think you sound very sensible despite how difficult this must be for you I find it hard to be sensible

KA92 i was the same i had a big bump and everyone knew, my friends had planned my baby shower and everything.I think its difficult for people our age to like comprehend it unless its happened to them, i mean its hard enough being older and knowing what to say but when your young people just assume all the wrong things.Like one that particularly annoyed me was people thinking i must be relieved, that infuriated me.Yes it would have been difficult but being a parent always is, it would also have been amazing.I guess im struggling with the idea that i cant have all those things i planned.I'll always love Rowan so much, i get a lump in my throat just writing his name, but he showed me what i want from life and thats to be a mum.The fact i have to wait is just so painful, his dad left when he found out so im alone i have years to wait

How are you both doing?

yeah my best mate was contantly at my side it was my closest mates that first felt Jamie move, first who saw her scans when i began showing no one wanted to know me....then i lost her took about two weeks off school and everyone was told a)not to look at my tummy and b) not to mention it...some b**ch came up and went "so did ya like have a abortion or ya lose it then cos we all wanna know like" i was livid...never ever seen my best mate get so angry...everyone knew it was cos of my ex(bruises dont heal in two weeks i was covered) so grrrr i still get angry now lol

im okay you?
x

Im so sorry for your loss hun.
Just take all the time you need to grief and its true when they time is a healer, Im 20yrs old and i lost mine back in may at 12weeks and i thought i wud never smile again and stop crying, but it does get easier, I feel much stronger in myself now, i still have bad days but that is completly normal.

I wish you all the best xx

Omg that is so cruel!! Karmas a bitch and im telling you it'll get those girls, how could they be so insensitive!! Some people are heartless! I dont blame you being angry i would of beaten the crap out of her Im not in school anymore so thankfully didnt have to deal with that, nobody speaks of it ever.Its like it never happened which is infuriating, i dont care if it upsets me i like to hear people acknowledge his existance.Im doing ok though finally getting it together enough to leave the house which is great, i couldnt even get out of bed at first just didnt see the point.I went out with my friends saturday night for a while, easily the most depressing birthday of my life.But it gets easier with time i suppose, didnt believe it at first but its true, the only thing that really helps is remembering,letting yourself be upset and time

Hey hun I am going through this now after finding out I have had an MMC yesterday at our scan. Like you I sometimes feel so alone even though I know I'm not as I have my winderful OH, fantastic friends and all the ladies on here who have been a great help.

It's almost like they've all had the news but I've been left the one who is still walking round carrying it inside me. Until I either get my erpc or it happens naturally I don't think I'm even going to start being able to recover myself. I just want someone to come along and take it all away so I can start getting over it too

It is such an incredibly hard time and I think with a MMC it can be harder as you know that everything is still there. I just wish my stupid body had picked up on what had happened and sorted it out weeks ago. It makes me feel so upset to think that for the past 6 weeks there hasn't even been anything there even though I thought there had.

so sorry for your loss
i understand how ur feeling, im 22 and just had my 5th m/c in the last 2 years....we're all here to help and support eachother xxxx

yeah i know, my second baby i was at uni. Yeah my mates often bring up Jamie (and now Tayloir though we didnt get ot know him/her as well ) as if they are one of us..OH lit a candle for Jamies death date (last friday) which touched my (very cold and protected) heart as he wasnt around he wasnt her father but he did it without asking and found her scan pics to look at

yeaqh its good your getting outa bed and out and about...after the first few times you get used to it
yeah iv held back with the upset bnut i can feel it about to explode

Im so sorry for all your losses ladiesm/c are tough but at least wev each other to help keep strong

xx