bevan88

Dont know what to type? Im really just at my lowest i can take no more from anger to despair.
It is 10 weeks since i started miscarrying 9 weeks since medical failed i was told it had worked so grieved tried to rebuild against the pain for 7 weeks until they found retained products! and now 2 weeks after erpc i have been experiancing the same pains again on and off just as before!
I have a scan tomorrow to check a scan they said i wouldnt need but i demanded! I need to know that its all gone now so i can move on, i will then attribute the pains to healing pains and constipation and maybe even stress!

I cant take anymore of this its wearing me down im tired im miserable its ruining my life! I wana get on with things i dont wana keep getting pains.

Out of the last 54 days i have bled for 43 of them some days heavy some days just spotting! i have had 5 days without bleeding to date but still have the cramps pelvic pressure and rectal pains hip pains!

I ve been testing negitive for hcg urine for 3 weeks now!

I wana know when my periods will come back i wana know why everytime i eat my stomach still swells up and i feel sick! i wana know why iam still getting pains!

The doctor i seen last week who reluctantly booked my scan said to me even if you have retained products now they wont do anything as the amount would be so small it wouldnt warrent any further action???? Is this true?

I dont know what to think anymore i just want closure! I went back to work last thursday for the first time in 9 weeks hal;f days till tuesday next week. Im dreading tomorrow i go straight to hosp for scan from work!!!

I stopped taking painkillers on friday and the pain has since come back worse!

I know when i get to epac tomorrow the dr will say WHY ARE YOU HERE? its gonna take me all the strength in the world not to swing for them---im fed up of reexplaining my story and trying to explain my pain!

Im sick of people expecting i should be physically o.k now IAM NOT O.K I AM STILL IN PAIN MOSTLY MILD SOMETIMES WORSE BUT I AM NOT O.K!!!! I DONT KNOW HOW TO BE OK AGAIN WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?

i keep thinking im loosing my mind searching for answers as to whats causing my pain! Iam not a hypochondriac i just wana know why im still hurting!

I want people to start believing me for once im not the best at explaining where my pain is and i do tend to snap at people but its only because i am so frustrated!

ITS NOT FAIR! I DONT CARE IF IT SOUNDS LIKE I FEEL SORRY FOR MYSELF I CAN IF I WANT! I DONT BLAME ME! I WANT TO KNOW THERE IS NO MORE BITS OF MY DEAD BABY LEFT IN ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ARTGHHHHHHHHHHH


sorry to rant iam just having a bad hour! i will be calm and rational again soon as i always do just needed to get that off my chest thanks for reading.

shocker

I hope you get your answers soon and keep us updated on how the scan goes, i think your doctor may be right after all you've been through its unlikely theres anything there. You have been so strong through all this and you only have one more day before you find out whats going, try and hang in there.At least tomorrow you'll know whats going on, it could be that this is an unrelated medical condition thats come about at the same time but at least you'll be able to separate the two.Good luck tomorrow i'll be thinking of you

lori

You're right, this isn't fair. They've taken what is already a devastating experience and made it even more traumatic. I can't imagine going through everything you've gone through. I'm so sorry.

Good for you for standing up for yourself and demanding a scan. How dare they act like it's no big deal?!? I hope you get some answers at your scan and are finally able to get some closure.

I don't know what else to say, just wanted to let you know that I'm thinking of you. Please let us know how it goes

bevan88

Thanks for replys, i am o.k just needed to let off some steam! Iam sure this time round they will say to me nothing there!

One more sleep and i will know weather to take Diclofenic again for the cramps and joint pains or more movicol for constipation?

Its kinda funny really i dont for one minute think there is anything wrong with me except maybe some retained products or constipation or both or neither and just the fact that my body is a little tired from the entire ordeal!

It would be nice to rule one out though at least then i can try and treat the other!

Fingers crossed!

sk100

Hi bevan
So sorry that you are still going through this. I read all your previous posts.

I really think that you should ask them to examine your ovaries thoroughly to make sure nothing else is going on. Also, make it clear to the docs what your symptoms are - bloating etc. Have you had a smear done recently?

roseanne

what do the doctors say to explain your pain? bleeding for all this time sounds like a lot, but I guess (as I'm sure you realize) you should really just count from the date of the ERPC, in which case the bleeding sounds a little long but not out of the realm of ordinary.

just be sure you have all of your questions written down when you go in, it's so easy to forget once you're actually face to face with the doctor! like, what could be causing me pain at this point? how long after the ERPC should i be concerned about continued bleeding? can something other than stress be causing my digestive problems? can you tell from scanning my ovaries whether i have ovulated or am about to ovulate? (here, they checked my ovaries throughout and said "i see the egg came from over here," so they can probably look at the follicles and see if an egg has been released and maybe if one is preparing to).

i end up feeling like the Grand Inquisitor when i go in armed with all my questions, and i sometimes feel like i make the doctors a little defensive, but if i don't ask everything on my mind, it gnaws at me. we have every right to get all the answers they are able to give. (unfortunately, they don't know everything - but it's surprising what they do know and don't bother to tell you!)

here (U.S.), my doctors made it sound like they would want to get out ANY retained products, but the negative HCG tests make it sound like it's gone. i would think they should do a blood test until you get a zero reading?

bevan88

Hi RToseanne thanks for your reply, the negative urine test offers me no answers as i still had reatined products enought to warrent emragancy surgery after testing negitive for a week before hand.

Your right about questions though i have 2 lists one for if there are no retianed products and one if there are going prepared this time.

BeanieBaby

I'm so sorry you're still going through all this, your experience just sounds horrendous, its no wonder you're at your witts end with it all. I hope you get sorted tomorrow and the doctors are more helpful this time. Fingers crossed you'll start to feel more human again soon. Keep us posted. xxx