I find this place so helpful. It's increadible how much it helps to be understood and felt for. Thank you for that girls.

I was told on Tue that the baby had died. As the bleeding had already started my midwife and I decided to wait for things to go naturally.
I've been bleeding on and off throughout the week. The bleeding started to be very heavy yestarday + a lot of pain. All is very similar to my first mc so I don't panic, just wait for the end.
I'm going to hospital tomorrow for the final scan and really hope for the "all clear".
Do you think I should go to hospital (A&E) today if I feel that I passed everything? Last time it was a horrible experience (they did nothing, I was almost told that I was overreacting!!!).
And one more thing. In myslef I feel I want to go for the scan alone. My husband doesn't cope with it too well, I feel I should be strong for him, but I can't. Also a friend offered to go with me, but... I know it's sill but I so hate showing others my weakness...It's easier to lose it in front of strangers than friends and family.
I don't know what to do.
My best friend Kalms helps the most. And this place. I feel lonely, but it's my choice. Stupid I know, but can't help it.

x

I think you should do what's right for you in both cases. If you feel you want to go to A&E, then you should. Was you last experience in A&E, the time you felt they made you feel you were over reacting? If it was, if you can I would wait until tomorrow for the scan as it will probably been in a different part of the hospital and they will probably be more sympathic.

As for taking someone with you, maybe you should take Kalms if she is the most supportive. I think it would probably help to have a friend with you and hopefully you won't feel so lonely. You shouldn't feel silly showing that you're hurting either. It's not a weakness, it's a valid emotion and you have every right to express that you are suffering.

I hope everything goes as well as it can in this situation and that your body has expelled all the tissue naturally so you can go home and continue to recover.

Sending you lots of hugs and well wishes.

Hi hun, thanks for reply.
You made me laugh in on this sad day- Kalms is a medicine for stress
But you're right - I must listen to myself. I'll think about it.

big hugs for you. Take care and rest x

i WOULDNT do yourself the injustice of going to A & E again unless things get really bad. They wont scan you and will likley send you away more worried!!! Just go if you need the pain relief from them, i doubt they would scan you on a weekend!

Weak? don't be silly hun. What you are going through is a very personal and emotional thing. I coped with most of it on my own as my other half decided he could not cope and went 300 miles away back to his ex. I went to all my scans and appointments on my own and didn't tell anyone. Until last friday when I knew I was going to habe to have surgery so turned to my best friend for support. She has been amazing. I didn't need surgery in the end as started bleeding last sunday. I started losing the pregnancy on tuesday and due to large amount of blood loss she was took me to hospital. I need to go back the next 2 days for scans and was finally discharged on the thursday as my pregnancy had finally passed. I was in so much pain and so weak I was unable to do much (and she wouldn't let me she loved telling me off!!!!) She stayed with me till thursday leaving her poor husband to fend for himself!!! I can understand you wanting to go alone everyone copes with things in their own way and you have to do what feels right for you. I f you are concerned about anything go to a and e or phone nhs direct, my hospital has a seperate ward that I could phone or go to 24 hours a day. They were amazing and so supportive. I hope it all works out for you. and remember you are not weak you are brave xxxx

Thank you.
I did go on my own. It was ok. Very calm. Though I have to say that the nurse doing the scan was all chearful and "next time you'll be lucky!" that it made me sick.
I miscarried naturally yesterday at night. It was the worst experience of my life. I'm still in shock. My first mc was so different.
Anyway - it's all over now. Time to rest and slowly move on.Back on the pill. Focus on my little girl.
I don't think I'll ever try again. But we'll see.

Thanks again.

Ashii xx

Ashii,
Well done sweetheart. You have been amazing and brave, never think any different. I can absolutly understand not wanting to try again. Give yourself time to grieve, please don't force yourself on and take time for you if you need it. It might be that you feel stronger in the future but there is no need to rush. We are always here when you need a friend

you brave girl well done. think positive and take things slowly and rest xxxxx

Hun, you need to do whatever feels right for you. I'm in much the same boat, have to go up to the hospital in a minute and OH is tied up on a job, know my friend would come with me if I asked her too but I actually just want to do it alone.

Oh hun

you are so strong, don't be hard on yourself. I'm sorry for your losses, I don't blame you for not wanting to try again I am in two minds myself at the moment. But give yourself time and don't make any rash decisions at the moment. (hugs)

Soph x