Hello Ladies I hope you are all doing as well as you can!

I'm sure some of you have no idea who I am, as I do not come on here as much lately. And for that I am sorry it's just a lot easier to stay away then to come on and have a daily reminder of what I lost and will never have again.
Last year this time, my life was full of promise, a new future to plan and just had so much to look forward too! Then we found out we had lost our Daughter Rebecca @ 20 weeks and all my joy and the future we had planned for her left and left me broken
Her 1 year birthday is coming up way to fast for me to deal with and I am so torn. I have been volunteering extra hours at my older children school and working more to try and keep my mind off of her, but ever time I have a spare second I think back to that horrible day my life changed forever and I just hurt!!!

We had planned on going to the mountains to have a small intimate celebration for her 1 yr b-day. My DH had suggested taking a very small amount of her ashes and spreading them where I had placed my Dads 20 yrs ago. At first I said yes but as the day draws closer I cant seem to part with any part of her. I am just so torn as I thought I was doing so much better and then the past few weeks I am a total mess.. I take a bath almost every night so I can just sit in there and cry.

I miss her so much and my heart is breaking all over again.

Sorry it was so long Ladies I just needed to get it out and I knew you all would listen.Thanks
Rach

I wish I knew what to say. I'm thinking of you

Hunni I am so sorry, I genuinely hope things get a lot better for you... Its hard.. but you will survive as a strong woman...My thoughts are with you xx

I know there is nothing that can be said. You have helped me so much since my mc that I wanted to say something. You have been amazingly strong this year. Remember Rebecca in the way that seems right to you. I'm sure that when the time comes, you'll know. You're her Mummy.

Cat
xxx

My heart goes out to u hun I dont really know what to say to make it better as no words will but i didnt want to read and run. There are some fantastic women on here with storys just like ur own, i find it sort of helps knowing your not alone in this and that it is completely normal to feel the way that you do. I hope day by day things get easier for you i really do. In the mean time share ur feelings with ur OH dont grieve by yourself hun. And i think the memorial for your baby girl is a great idea. You take care of yourself ok and were here when you need to vent frustrations etc alright . sending lots of hugs Lov Caz x x x

My heart is breaking for you too. Sending you all the love and support that I can. Thinking of you hun. xox We're all here to talk when you need us.

I am so sorry with what you are going through at the moment. It must be unbelievably hard

Thinking of you xx