Hi ladies, if this is in the wrong place, please feel free to delete it...

This may seem rather strange, but please, its really upsetting me at the moment, and I don't know how to feel anything else other then sadness...

In October 2007 I had a very long cycle, despite being on the pill, I just didnt bleed... then when I finally did bleed, it was agonising, (tmi) clotty and long. I phoned my sister to ask her what it could be, (shes a nurse) and she suspected a misscarraige..

I remember being petrified at the time so didnt go to my doctors at all... and left it at that.. and I have always wondered.. me and OH have always wondered whether we could have had our little baby, and what he or she would have looked like and been like...

I went to a psychic / fortune teller last night, and the first thing he said to me, before I'd even said hi was:

'Laura, this may be upsetting, but you constantly think about it... you had a miscarraige in October 2007, with your current OH whos in the Forces. I thought I should let you know to put that part of your mind at rest.'

Of course I burst in to tears. It feels like all those feelings Ive tried to regress are coming up now, and I feel like I shouldn't be feeling them because it happened so long ago... Im so shocked that he knew about it, my best friend even said to me... 'I didn't know you'd had a misscarraige.'

Im so sorry to clogg up this part of the forum, I just needed to get that off my chest, please, if you feel its inappropriate, please delete.

to all.

Lou

xxx

hun , it couldnt be further from inappropriate
it sounds like you believed this was a miscarriage and this lady seems to have known her stuff.
i am so sorry for your loss.

Hi

I went through a very similar experience 10 years ago. My case was a little bit different; I was in quite a bad marriage at the time and my ex-h was in total denial that it was a miscarriage; I wasn't on the pill when I think I conceived but I went on it a few weeks later as I had no idea I was probably pregnant, still many weeks later, its a long time ago but it was between 8 and 12 weeks later, I had the clotty, heavy painful bleed like you have mentioned. Even though there were clearly flesh-like clots my ex said a miscarriage isn't like that; and I said maybe I should go to the doctor to check, and my ex said 'the doctor will laugh and think you're an idiot so please for your own sake, don't do that' (he was quite a bit older and very manipulative unfortunately). I then had on/off unexplained bleeding for months which my GP at the time said was due to my body not liking the pill (and my periods never came at the correct time they were supposed to on the pill and were much heavier than even normal periods) but I do wonder now if it was actually due to retained products from the miscarriage. I buried it for years and even started to believe him myself; until recently when I had another miscarriage and then I just knew that this is the only time you get that type of bleeding and clots. It has dredged up a lot of old feelings for me; a lot of negativity towards my former husband as he clearly had no concern for my health, this could have caused me long term infertility or even killed me; though thankfully neither turned out to be the case, nor did he have any idea what he was talking about but was just trying to show who is boss. But you have to move on. I don't believe in psychics at all; but what that person said is common sense in a way, you really need to come to terms with what has happened; it isn't easy I know.

Soph x

Thank you for your kind words girls.

Soph, I am so sorry that your ex husband treated you like that and at such a difficult time. Even the mere thought of a MC is upsetting, he should have been more supportive of you. I'm also so sorry to here of the recent MC you had. My heart goes out to you darling.

Lou

xxx

Hi Lou, it sounds as though your experience has really affected you, even though you don't know for sure, it is a good thing to come on here to talk if it helps. I don't know anything about your situation now, but hope that you and your OH are doing well.

Hi Lou

thanks; I was very angry and upset when I realised for sure what happened all those years ago was a miscarriage but now I feel a lot better about it; and its just another thing that has made me feel completely vindicated of any blame for his stupidity and the way he treated me. He was a nasty piece of work and thats all there is too it. Am slowly working through what happened recently as well, I feel a little bit better each day....

Soph x