hi all.


well firstly i just wanted to say hi and i have joined this sight as have no one to really talk to about what has happened.

4 days ago i was rushed into hospital(my hubby to in 2 weeks was on his stag doo) i did not call my bf as did not want to worry him...anyway i was rushed into hospital with very bad tummy cramps..when i got there it turned out i was atleast 10-14 weeks pregnant and had suffered a misscariage to which i did not know i was evan pregnant.

My question is really is it normal to be so emotional onw min im upset at the thought i have lost a baby the next im fine thiking that i didnt know i was pregnant so it would be worse if i knew etc...then i keep wondering if i have killed my baby as the hospital said i had misscaried due to stree smoking drinking and going about a normal life

we have chosen not to tell our parents and upset them or my partner did anyway but he kind of thinks that i can just move on from it because we didnt know i was pregnant but to be honest i am hating how i feel the hospital said it is normal to feel like you need to be pregnant due to me having a baby etc but considering i didnt no is this right also i dont think he realises but im the one stil having the craps and bleeding etc..........i feel like i need to get pregnant again i do not no weather to tell my parents or not i know he will argue about it with me!

also may i add i am die to get married to my partner in two weeks!!!!

any advice will seriously be appreciated x

jade
x

p.s sorryi realise there are many spelling mistakes i was trying to type fast

I'm really sorry that you are going through this. It must be a really confusing time for you. I think that you need a lot of support when you go through something like this and so if you need that support from your parents you need to tell them and your H2B needs to understand that.
I don't believe that you had a MC because you were leading a normal life like the hospital said. You cannot blame yourself for your loss! Have a good read of the leaflets on this site http://www.miscarriageassociation.org.uk/

A loss can take a long time to get over - you must give yourself time to come to terms with this. You must heal physically and emotionally.

As you wedding is so soon I would focus on getting ready for your big day and try and have the happiest day of your life.

I am so sorry for your loss hun. You didn't know that you were pregnant so please don't feel guilty for going on with your life as usual. Remember it does take a long time to feel better after a loss and you will need that time. I agree with Tansey, try to focus on your big day coming up. I hope you have a wonderful day!

hi thankyou for your replies!its much appreciated!!!
i think i will tell my parents as it will ease some of the pressure off me...i really am trying to just focus on my wedding but my best friend is7 months preg which makes it very hard and i really feel lik ei need to have or wants a baby now x

also my nan has just had cancer which is why i dont or didnt want to tell my parents x

Have you discussed having children with your H2B? Is it the right time for you both? If yes you can get married and when feeling ready - go for it! Otherwise wait until the time is right and you can read up on stuff get healthier etc etc in the mean time.

you must be confused hun, it is absolutley normal to feel the loss, you might not have known about your baby but you do now. and what a bombshell to find out that you were pregnant and no longer pregnant at he same time.
you cant blame yourself hun, something along the lines of 20% of pregnancys end in misscarriage before 12 weeks, which is a massivly high number

i absolutly believe you should tell your parents ! you need their support, evenjust having the converation with them will allow you to open up about your feelings and having a good cry on your mums shoulder will do you the world of good.

i felt the same about wanting to getting pregnant again straight away after, but you need to make sure you are ready emotionally and physically. i has an ectopic pregnancy, i had known for 2 weeks that i was pregnant and went in for an early scan due to light bleeding, the pregnancy was confirmed to be outside of the uterus and in the left tube, i was trated quickly and they saved my tube, but i remember being told that i had to have 3 normal periods before i should try again ( or higher risk of another ectopic) having to wait i thought was going to kill me, infact it took 3 months for my period to return even.

any way the reason im telling you this ( sure you dint really want to know my story at this time) is just to let you know that youre not alone, i know how you feel to a degree and you have every right to feel this way.
also that there is a light at the end of every tunnel ( mine came in the shapeof my son who was concieved 6 months after losing my first pregnancy)
my thought are with you and i am so sorry for your loss

no he doesnt want children yet but was upset that we lost our baby

just read this, sorry to hear about your nan too, but your parents will be able to handle this. if anything they would really want to be there for you, so do let them