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Miscarriage & Loss Support

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Old Jan 3rd, 2008, 19:39 PM   #1
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To all who has had a loss/losses


I was passing thru something and made me thing of making a list on what I know.. it is about how I feel though I had two miscarriages.. It will make us stronger as we know that life is great and miracles do happen..

I know it's hard for us who has had miscarriages to live with the fact that we were gona be moms wich is the best gift in life, and it didnt happen..

We should always say to ourselves:

I know...

... that I didn't do anything to cause my miscarriages.
... that one day I will be pregnant again and will eventually hold a healthy baby in my arms.
... that miscarriage has nothing to do with whether I have done good or bad in my lifetime or whether or not i deserve a baby
... that no matter how hard I cry or get upset I cannot have what could have been.
... that with each day i grow stronger and with my strength i can help others gain some positivity out of something so cruel.
... that i need to have lots of patience and take everyday as it comes
...that when I get pregnant again and have a baby Im going to cherish it and never take it for granted
...that although im not pregnant I do have something to live for and when it happens ill have more to live for
... that I am more focused now
... that the way I feel is temporary.



Please feel free to add your thoughts
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The following 7 users say 'Thanks' to suzan for this post:
Gabi (Jan 14th, 2008), jo27 (Jan 4th, 2008), Mango (Jan 14th, 2008), NeyNey (Jan 14th, 2008), poppy (Jan 3rd, 2008), Simi (Feb 7th, 2008), Sweetie (Jan 12th, 2008)
Old Jan 3rd, 2008, 19:51 PM   #2
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That's really lovely Suzan.
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Old Jan 3rd, 2008, 19:56 PM   #3
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poppy,

This thread is also meant to everyone who had a miscarriage/s.

Please everyone, feel free to add your "I know..." list.
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Old Jan 3rd, 2008, 22:07 PM   #4
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Very beautiful
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Old Jan 3rd, 2008, 22:48 PM   #5
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I know that no matter what happens, I'll always love my little ones, I'll never hold them in my arms, only in my heart
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Old Jan 14th, 2008, 07:44 AM   #6
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Thanks for that. It was really touching.

I think I'll add what I learnt.

Even though that baby is no longer with you it will continue to teach you some of the most important lessons in life day by day.

Mine still does to this day.

The one thing you said hit home. Because it was used against me the other day. My rather mean MIL hasn't been getting along with us recently and she told my husband the reason why I had a miscarriage was because I'm evil and I don't deserve a child. God only gives gifts to good people.

Needless to say that shook me up and left me wondering whether she was right. My husband said I should ignore her. But it still hurts.
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Old Jan 14th, 2008, 10:51 AM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gabi View Post

The one thing you said hit home. Because it was used against me the other day. My rather mean MIL hasn't been getting along with us recently and she told my husband the reason why I had a miscarriage was because I'm evil and I don't deserve a child. God only gives gifts to good people.

Needless to say that shook me up and left me wondering whether she was right. My husband said I should ignore her. But it still hurts.
OMG! Your MIL is so mean!!!!!!!!!!!
Dont listen to her, all of them are the same.. My MIL is ok, I have nothing bad to say about her though she has done bad things to me, but she never said a word about the 2 miscarriages we went thru bec she knows it will hurt her son. But deep inside, I know she thinks things about it but knows she cant say them.

As long as u and ur DH have a wonderful life dont think about her. Remember, they are his parents, ONLY. My miscarriages made my relationship so so so much stronger.

Am sorry sweetie u r passing thru all this. Good luck!!
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Old Jan 14th, 2008, 14:40 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gabi View Post
My rather mean MIL hasn't been getting along with us recently and she told my husband the reason why I had a miscarriage was because I'm evil and I don't deserve a child. God only gives gifts to good people. Needless to say that shook me up and left me wondering whether she was right. My husband said I should ignore her. But it still hurts.
Suzan that was a lovely post!

Gabi don't listen to her!! She obviously has a lot of negativity in her life and is miserable, thus she wants everyone else around her to be miserable too. Don't for one minute entertain those words
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Old Jan 15th, 2008, 08:25 AM   #9
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Oh sweetie what a beautiful post......I have tears just steaming down my face

If I can add just one.

I have learned that when you have reached your lowest despair, a families love becomes it's strongest.

I say that because without my DH, I never would have survived my loss.
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Old Feb 7th, 2008, 07:04 AM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by suzan View Post
I was passing thru something and made me thing of making a list on what I know.. it is about how I feel though I had two miscarriages.. It will make us stronger as we know that life is great and miracles do happen..

I know it's hard for us who has had miscarriages to live with the fact that we were gona be moms wich is the best gift in life, and it didnt happen..

We should always say to ourselves:

I know...

... that I didn't do anything to cause my miscarriages.
... that one day I will be pregnant again and will eventually hold a healthy baby in my arms.
... that miscarriage has nothing to do with whether I have done good or bad in my lifetime or whether or not i deserve a baby
... that no matter how hard I cry or get upset I cannot have what could have been.
... that with each day i grow stronger and with my strength i can help others gain some positivity out of something so cruel.
... that i need to have lots of patience and take everyday as it comes
...that when I get pregnant again and have a baby Im going to cherish it and never take it for granted
...that although im not pregnant I do have something to live for and when it happens ill have more to live for
... that I am more focused now
... that the way I feel is temporary.



Please feel free to add your thoughts



That was very beautiful Suzan. I now understand that what happened was really not my fault. Thank you very much.
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