Jade is a Tom Boy and like a lot of kids when we have been in shops she has wanted a gun (I am going back to the age of 3-4 til present). So we have bought her a gun, tbh I never gave it a second thought it was a toy that I played with as a kid when I used to play TJ Hooker so never put any thought into it.
I lived a long way away from my sister and when I went to visit I was shocked at the fact that her little boy was not aloud to play with guns, swords and anything of the like, but it soon became apparant why. He would not only play with them but he was actually violent with them, he would take a full swing with swords and really hurt people as well as hit things around the house. He just never knew the difference between playing and being violent.
Because Jade was playing with guns, had light sabres and watched Spiderman, The Hulk and whatever else she enjoyed within reason I got a real strong sense of my sister's OH looking right down his nose at me for letting Jade do what my sister's son was not a loud to do, corrrr I could feel it a mile off. It was as if I was a shit Mum for letting her have fun, as that is what she was doing, she was playing and enjoying herself, unlike what my nephew was doing, he almost terrorised people.
If Jade was violent with light sabres and swords and guns in any way and was physically fighting with kiddies rather than playing then she would not be a loud to play with them, but as she is sensible and able to 'play' I don't see the harm at all!
As you said, they are kiddies and it is all part of role play in my opinion, they see guns in cartoons and they don't see the dark side of guns, as cartoon charaters always get up and walk away. I know they will soon learn about the darker side as they get older but we as parents need to guide them as best we can. x
Sure seems to be that we are living parallel lives
You know, children who grow up and become gang members or murderers must have had some signs as they were growing up as to how they might become. These kids are often mean to animals, other kids, etc. Parents in these situations probably turned a blind eye to it and never got them help when they needed it.
Another thing, if my OH was violent I'd be concerned about my kids too and what they would perceive as being normal. He's not and he's as sweet as can be. If my kids were abused physically and mentally, I'd also be concerned - but they aren't. Often it's the dynamics of the parents that will teach a kid later on in how to react to situations.
If my boy and soon to be boy(s) started showing signs at an earlier age, they'd be getting help and it would be then that I took all gun toys away, etc. But he's a sweet kid and I honestly believe he will not turn into a monster.
How many boys, now men, played with guns, army guys, etc. when they were young yet turned out to be fabulous? I bet the percentage is extremely high in comparison to those that didn't turn out ok.
I have a big big fear of guns, I don't know where the fear came from but if I see a anyone with a gun (even if it is a toy gun) it makes me feel really scared & sick! When I go abroad or to the airport where police have guns I always feel nervous in public or around police.
I could let my LO have a water gun but that would be my limit, any type of imitation wepon is a no no for me.
I do get stares when Noah has upsiy Daisy when we're out & about.....whats wrong with a boy having an upsiy daisy??
My OH has a problem with toy guns too but I really don't see the problem, as long as they don't look real right?
DSS was here a couple of months ago and OH mum bought him a toy gun, he loved it so much OH had to let him play with it. he decided to take it home but when they got there and he showed his mum, he was told it wasn't allowed in the house and he had to leave it with OH.
Now, I know that poeple worry about older boys having guns and this gang culture (poor choice of word IMO) but if you tell a child they cant have something dont they want it even more? I'm not sure.....
I know that at least here there is no chance of little fingers finding a real gun in a draw and playing with it thinking its a toy, I don't know about other places.
Like you said children have played cowboys and indians, and sword fighting for years, even I did and I havent killed anyone yet....
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OMG you are my Parallel world......
so never put any thought into it.
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