Welcome to BabyandBump's Just For Fun Forum - Games, jokes, fun and frollocks. Kick back and enjoy the lighter side of BabyandBump. This thread is called 'Mr Bum's jokes not to tell small children' and is in our Lounge Area section. | 
Aug 14th, 2008, 22:17 PM
|
#1 | | Dad Active BnB Member
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 683
Thanked others: 36
Thanked 93 times in 85 posts
I'm Currently Feeling:  | Mr Bum's jokes not to tell small children
The teacher asked the class to use the word "fascinate" in a sentence
Molly put up her hand and said, "My family went to my granddad's farm, and we all saw his pet sheep.
It was fascinating."
The teacher said, "That was good, but I wanted you to use the word "fascinate, not fascinating".
Sally raised her hand. She said, "My family went to see Rock City and I was "fascinated."
The teacher said, "Well, that was good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word "fascinate."
Little Johnny raised his hand.
The teacher hesitated because she had been burned by Little Johnny before.
She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word "fascinate", so she called on him.
Johnny said, "My aunt Gina has a sweater with ten buttons, but her boobs are so big she can only fasten eight." |
__________________
| | Status: Offline
| | | The following user says 'Thank You' to MrTashaAndBum for this post: | | |
Aug 14th, 2008, 22:18 PM
|
#2 | | Dad Active BnB Member
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 683
Thanked others: 36
Thanked 93 times in 85 posts
I'm Currently Feeling: | The Haunted Car
This story happened a while ago in Brisbane, and even though it sounds like an Alfred Hitchcock tale, it's true.
John Bradford, a Sydney University student, was on the side of the roadhitch hiking on a very dark night and in the midst of a storm.
The night was rolling on and no car went by. The storm was so stronghecould hardly see a few feet ahead of him.
Suddenly he saw a car slowly coming towards him and stopped.
John, desperate for shelter and without thinking about it, got in thecar and closed the door, just to realise there was nobody behind thewheeland the engine wasn't on!
The car started moving slowly. John looked at the road and saw a curve approaching. Scared, he started to pray, begging for his life. Then,just before he hit the curve, a hand appeared through the window and turnedthe wheel.
John, paralysed with terror, watched how the hand appeared every timethey came to a curve. John saw the lights of a pub down the road so,gathering strength, jumped out of the car and ran to it.
Wet and out of breath, he rushed inside and asked for two shots oftequila. He then started telling everybody about the horrible experience he went through.
A silence enveloped everybody when they realised he was crying and....wasn't drunk.
About 15 minutes later, two guys walked into the same pub. They werealso wet and out of breath. Looking around and seeing John Bradford sobbingat the bar, one said to the other, "Look, Bruce, here's the f**kingidiot that got in the car while we were pushing it." |
__________________
| | Status: Offline
| | | The following user says 'Thank You' to MrTashaAndBum for this post: | | |
Aug 14th, 2008, 22:28 PM
|
#3 | | Mum 2 little Ryan, ttc #2 Chat Happy BnB Member
Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: Ireland/Northern Ireland
Posts: 1,787
Thanked others: 479
Thanked 719 times in 712 posts
| LOVE IT!  |
__________________
| | Status: Offline
| | |
Aug 14th, 2008, 23:04 PM
|
#4 | | Mum of terror's BnB Addict
Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Wrexham, Wales
Posts: 3,271
Thanked others: 253
Thanked 1,048 times in 1,044 posts
I'm Currently Feeling:  | I love Little johnny jokes!! x x |
__________________
| | Status: Offline
| | |
Aug 14th, 2008, 23:11 PM
|
#5 | | mum and pregnant BnB Addict
Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Hampshire, UK
Posts: 6,763
Thanked others: 1,681
Thanked 2,361 times in 2,293 posts
I'm Currently Feeling:  | Brilliant! |
__________________
| | Status: Online
| | |
Aug 14th, 2008, 23:33 PM
|
#6 | | mad cat wifey! BnB Addict
Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: In a dungeon lol
Posts: 4,306
Thanked others: 633
Thanked 461 times in 449 posts
I'm Currently Feeling:  | |
__________________
| | Status: Offline
| | |
Aug 19th, 2008, 15:41 PM
|
#7 | | Mum (Mom) BnB Addict
Join Date: May 2008 Location: UK
Posts: 3,316
Thanked others: 273
Thanked 589 times in 578 posts
I'm Currently Feeling:  | |
__________________
| | Status: Offline
| | |
Aug 22nd, 2008, 06:53 AM
|
#8 | | TTC after m/c#2 Chat Happy BnB Member
Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Nova Scotia, Canada
Posts: 1,682
Thanked others: 889
Thanked 535 times in 462 posts
I'm Currently Feeling:  | |
__________________
| | Status: Offline
| | |
Aug 22nd, 2008, 20:18 PM
|
#9 | | TTC #1 Cycle #6 BnB Elite
Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: New York, USA
Posts: 11,407
Thanked others: 1,640
Thanked 3,006 times in 2,991 posts
I'm Currently Feeling: | |
__________________
| | Status: Offline
| | |
Aug 23rd, 2008, 08:08 AM
|
#10 | | Pregnant (Expecting) Inactive
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 1,943
Thanked others: 358
Thanked 464 times in 462 posts
I'm Currently Feeling:  | | | | | Status: Offline
| | 
Similar Threads | | Thread | Thread Starter | Forum | Replies | Last Post | | small bump small baby????? | xgemmax | Pregnancy - Third Trimester | 11 | Jul 15th, 2008 23:22 PM | | some lame jokes lol | weestar21 | Just For Fun | 0 | Feb 5th, 2007 17:24 PM | | Jokes | vicky | General Chatter | 6 | Sep 2nd, 2006 17:00 PM | | |
