turbo_mom

It may seem frightening to want to get involved and to just sit back and let them deal with it but how many people have done that with the end result being a dead woman and a parentless child??
I'm sure there's got to be some way to help. I would at least inform the police so they at least know he is endangering her life and their sons life. Domestic violence is not something to take lightly. It's far too common and so many women are left to deal wth it alone.
I know for me I would try to help because I couldn't live with the guilt for the rest of my life if she died and I chose to ignore it.

Good luck hun you have a good heart i'm sure you'll do the right thing

AquaDementia

I am afraid he will hurt her or do something to my family if he finds out we were behind it

doumauk

Believe me, if its reported and she is strong and tells the police everything. Then if you really fear for your life, I dont think the police are going to just let him wander around free. If you have genuine reason to feel like your life or anyone elses is at risk or harm could come to you there is ways and mean for keeping him away from you all. Whether that is an injunction or to be held in custody. Find out what help is available but please try to help in some way.

I really dont understand men or women who are violent towards partners, it really upsets me. They have to be sick in the mind i think.

alyxzandra

He sounds like a right piece of work and I know how you feel since I have been in your situation.

I just helped a friend of mine get out of an abusive relationship. I knew both of them and he is a rough biker who has been in prison before. I offered my friend to stay with us until she got settled into alternative housing. However, once she left and he made contact with me, I told him exactly what I thought. He has not tried anything and the police have been involved, so I think he will lay low. I just had to help because I could not sit back knowing my friend and her daughter were in that situation.

However, if your cousin does makes threats, you can go to the police. But, if she is willing to leave the situation, she needs to have the tools to do so. Also, he may not mess with you if there is police involvement. Men who do domestic violence usually try to make themselves out to be the victim.

Uvlollypop

give me the details and ill report it hes got a long way to come to get mad at me,

he needs dealing with, maybe he needs reminding of his manners towards women and that theres always someone bigger who will flatten ya

TashaAndBump

Oh goodness, what a difficult situation!

Do they have social services over there? You can anonymously report to social services but don't count on that she will admit to this happening, or accept their intervention. No woman wants to be in that situation, and dreams of it stopping, but doubts that it ever will and often believes that it is all her own fault. It can take years for them to actually get or accept help - and sometimes they never do. Hundreds of women die every year at the hands of their partners / husbands.

I am so sorry that you feel caught up in this, and that your cousin is acting in this way toward his wife....

If you need to do something, then report it - to the police or social services, they may ask you to give your details but you do not have to.

Like I say, though, she may not accept the help - but at least you will have done something! Could you maybe contact her and offer her details of a battered woman shelter? Or maybe you could even pick her and their child up when he is not in, and take them there yourself?

Big I so hope things improve... Do let us know if what you decide on, and if there are any updates won't you.

xarlenex

Im pretty sure you can report anonymously to the police. It would be horrible to have this hanging on your shoulders. You'll be scared to get too involved incase he finds out and comes to you. Tbh I think i would try report it anonymously first x

Mamafy

I wouldnt do anything without the girls knowledge, I would certainly help her and find accommodation for her and get her all the help she needs but to just report it without getting her out safe could really endanger her. If thye police for instance goes to her house he may act like the nicest guy in the world then she'll get a worse beating when they leave cause he'll know shes told someone.

The other thing is she may well love him and not want to leave but I would give her all the information and help her that way.

AquaDementia

That's what I think might end up happening. I don't want to involve myself publicly to her husband, but I think an anonymous call to the police or abused women's centre is the way to go.

I honestly have no relationship with her, I don't know where she lives, I have never spoken to her for more than 2 minutes, but I still feel that something needs to be done.

AquaDementia

And yes, mamafy...that is exactly what i am afraid of.