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Originally Posted by Moulder86  Well my ex had a date last night, which apprently went really well and he'll be seeing her again. In the past he's said how we were a mistake a bit of fun that got out of hand to hear how much he likes her and it could turn into something really hurt. I thought I could cope with it but doesn't seem I can. 
I'm thinking how when he said to me to get rid of it I should have. I'm hating myself for thinking like this it's not my lil man's fault but everything else as well like having to have second hand most things is getting to me, not really having my parents support, money issues you know the usual is making me think more and more that I made the wrong decision all those months ago.
I can't even talk to him about it because he'll go on about how he gave me the choice. I can't talk to my friends about it they'll all think bad of me.
I'm fooling myself about eventually getting a diploma in counselling too thinking it's a good career, will be good to have that sort of income to support my child but knowing I don't have the money to do it and I'd probably be useless at doing it anyway and fail miserably!!
I'm sorry for my rant but really needed to scream without letting my lot know theres something wrong.
xx |
Oh no, do not blame yourself at all. Number one, him saying what happened with you was a mistake and a bit of fun is all wrong in every way, shape and form. How dare he put you down as though you are worthless! And then to rub your nose in it about his date? How rude is that? No wonder you feel so horrible. Any person would feel the same way. He is just trying to hurt you.
He wanted you to get rid of it in order to exonerate himself of any responsibility. And is trying to make things worse by saying the things he did. And your parents should be there for you, but unfortunately, parents are not always supportive. But, your LO will love you because you made the choice to keep him and will be there for him. Being a single mother will not be easy, but it can be done.
As for your friends....if they are true friends, really decent friends, they will be there for you through thick and thin. Maybe if you reach out to them they will offer more support than you think. As for talking to him - well, you would get more support out of a brick wall. He is out to hurt, through and through.
As for going for a career in counselling, you can do it. You need faith in yourself even if no one else does. In fact, if it was me, I would ensure I get my degree just to thumb my nose at any naysayers.
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