My in laws really do my head in, it doesnt bother my oh or atleast he says it doesnt, but it really bugs me.

right, my in-laws have 3 grandchildren, nicole, callum and bailey. and what bothers me is that they blatantly favour bailey (my oh's brothers son).

it was nicoles birthday on saturday and we had a bbq and when they came they completely ignored nicole, wanting to know where bailey was and spent the day playing with him. it wasnt just me that noticed it either, some of our friends have commented on it.

And another thing is that they arent interested in callum in the slightest, since he was born they have seen him a handful of times, which i find really sad, cos he is such a joy to be around at the moment. i know that it is their loss at the end of the day but it hurts me to think that when my kids are grown up they may notice it.

how can you possibly have favourites?

I truly don't know what to say but I find that sad too.

it is really sad, they just completely blank callum, he doesnt know who they are!!! how can u do that to a child?

oh dear that doesn't sound very fair does it? Is Bailey the first grandchild? The reason I ask is that I know my sister in law as told me that our mother in law as said that the first grandchild will always have a special place in their hearts which kinda makes you think it is a bit unfair as surely they should all be treated equally and loved equally?

Also, I am one of 35 grandchildren on my dads side i am one of 17 and there is definite favouritism and all of the cousins know it but it isn't a problem to be honest as most of us are all older and thankfully there isn't any other grandchildren too close to the favourites age apart from his younger brother which is a bit sad

I think if it bothers you enough I would speak to the grandparents about it and share your concerns as your kids will notice it as they get older xx

my ex is like that with our boys (hes dad to both my boys) but really favours our younger one over the older......

the presents are better, he actually plays with the younger 1 not the older wen he sees them, wen he txts my older son he asks hows A-Jay not how are u both list goes on.......

he doesnt try and hide it at all, it really upsets my oldest and hes starting to hate him ( cant blame the kid but its heartbreaking)

hope it gets better for you

that is awful too what is wrong with people? How can people treat kids any differently I understand kids can have different personalities and so on but to love and favour one more than the other is sad and like you said your oldest boy is beginning to hate his dad and that is sad too have u said anything to your ex?

i know its really upsetting i would never treat a child differently, their biological dad is a prat hes meant to hav the boys over nyt every 2 weeks but ur lucky if he sees them for few hrs every few months, it was a very violent and emotionally draining relationship and it was wen he started on my older child and after i had a serious beating i managed to get out,

i asked him why does he treat them so differently and he says he doesnt but everyone sees he does and an example was for christmas oldest got a few sweets, a cd and a tracksuit, the younger one got a quad bike and lots of other stuff !!!! i sometimes feel i should make up for it but then think it will make my other kids feel less favoured so i dont (well norm end up spoilin all of them )

my new partner treats them all the same although our new baby is his 1 st and only LO ..... my boys call him Dad as hes been there since my boys were 1 1/2 and 6 we split for while and got back 2gether and have never been happier

I worry about the effect its having as the boys are very different for a few days after they hav seen their biological dad my oldest is a nightmare and sometimes lashes out at his younger brother and says that hes treating him the way his dad treats him says hes had bad childhood with his dad (hes only 12) and so hes giving the same to his little brother then after he does it he says sorry and is upset with himself, we are in the process of waiting to see someone about getting help for his anger .......... i hope it happens soon


sorry for the rant

No bailey is the middle grandchild, nicole is the eldest. i understand about the eldest grandchild thing but thats not the case with them.

i think it's mainly because of who his dad is, they totally favour him out of their 3 kids. I dont know why, he doesnt do anything special for him. I can probably count on my 2 hands the amount of times they have been to our house (we've lived here for 5yrs) and my oh's brother lives round the corner from us and they go and see them all the time and never ever pop in to see us. also when i was pregnant they would invite oh's brother & family round for dinner and never think to ask us, even tho they knew i was knackered.

i know favourtism goes on in probably everyones family, im one of 17 grandkids and i know that my nanna favours me, my little sister and my cousin, but she doesnt do it openly. just small little things like she'll buy stuff for my kids when she's shopping, she does the same for my cousin. Its just that they (oh's parents) do it so openly.

even if you mention anything to them about it they will not admit to it and say that they do not favour anyone over anybody else, but to everyone around them it is obvoius!!

cheeky carrie, my dad is exactly the same. My parents have recently split up and are getting divorced, my mum has the 3 younger kids and when they seperated my dad wanted custody of one of my brothers, he told my mam that he didnt want my younger sister and he definately didnt want my youngest brother. And it has had a major effect on my little brother.

i dont know how people can be so cruel!!!

yeah its not easy ............ 4 you

just give your kids extra love and and they will realise themselves when they are bigger whats happening and it will be your OH's parents that miss out when your kids start treating them differently