My OH works a lot. Wednesday-Saturday he's doing 9am till 11 or 11.30pm with only smoking breaks, Sunday he works 9am till 9.30 or 10pm with an hours break in the afternoon and Tuesdays he works 2.30pm till 11.30pm.

This gives him a day an a half off and he often still works at least half of one of those days. I don't really mind & I'm not clingy or anything. In fact time apart I think is very healthy. We live above our workplace too which is great because theres no time involved in going to and from work & I also work there so I still see him during the day.

I think this will sound like a really silly issue but I like to spend a little time with him and do some of the things I miss doing. Tonight for example he's going to the pub after work & I love going to the pub even if all I can drink is coke at the moment - it's just good to get out, socialize and do something with him. I especially want to make the most of being able to do that when ever I feel like it because I'm due in only a few weeks. The thing is I get the feeling I'm not really welcome to join them. He said I can come but I think only to be polite. He says he likes his time alone and I think he'd like it to just be guys so he can get drunk and play poker. I don't want to go and get in the way & also I find card games boring. I suppose in the back of my mind there is also that horrible gut feeling of what will he get up to if he's drunk?! Especially when he isn't really getting any at the moment & he has a strong history of cheating on exes even though he's now seeming very happy to be settling down and having a family. But I try not to think about that. After all we live in a tiny little village and half the female population around here are nuns.

When LO gets here he will have plenty of chances to go to the pub alone because I'll have to stay in. I also am slightly unhappy that he wants to go tonight and possibly tomorrow too & we have very little quality time together, which we should be making the most of since we will soon become 3!

Should I not worry and just go along to the pub anyway - besides I wouldn't stay as long as they do. I'd probably just go home after an hour or two because I get too tired. Or is this real 'guys' time which I'd be wrong to intrude upon? I've never really been faced with this sort of situation before since it used to always be me and OH doing things like that together. If one were to go to the pub there was no question about the fact the other would come too. We were and still are like best friends.

hey Hon,

Its totally understandable for you to want time together. Maybe you should tell him how you feel (try not criticise) and point out the benefits of spending time togther. tell him you are anxious about the birth and need some more support and closeness.........

good luck :-)