Okay, well my step-brother is in town and we haven't really talked, we keep exchanging phone messages. I called him again and spoke with my other brother who told me he was sleeping. We are trying to get together for his visit, and he is leaving on X-mas. We don't really have a relationship but I am trying to accommodate his visit as he is family and I want to see my niece, but I am really kinda bummed he is in town to be honest. No one in the family really gets along with him because he is very rude, selfish, and inconsiderate. But he is my brother! I wanted him to see our house because we just bought it in April and he has never seen where we've ever lived. He ditched coming over last time he was visiting, so I am still bitter about that. He always expects me to go to him whenever he is in town and I am really annoyed that he doesn't make any effort to see me. My husband doesn't like him and is just supporting me in whatever I want to do. Any ideas or advice???

Family can be dreadful and selfish sometimes. When I was pregnant my brother was very selfish, one example being that my boyfriend was unable to make a re-scan as his work wouldn't give him the day off, my mum was also working, so I asked my brother.. I rang him in the morning to confirm out arrangements for meeting him outside the hospital and his girlfriend told me that he wouldn't wake up, I then spoke to him on the phone and could hear he had no intention of coming to meet me, so I said "nevermind, i'll go alone" to which he replied "OK". Thinking he might still arrive, but he didn't and I was sat on my own and trying not to cry, I have never forgiven him. He also let me sort out his bedroom and move all his furniture out, knowing how heavily pregnant I was - thats selfish for you... anyway sorry for waffling about my problems when your posting yours but I just wanted to give you a few of many examples of how selfish family can be.

Im still pissed off about it, even now.. but he's my brother so I make every effort to get on with him and make him feel involved. Life is too short to think like that.

I have a similar relationship with my my sister-in-laws.

My advice is just do your best and try and make it happen and if it still falls on it's ass then at least you know you tried on you half. But what I do is I just smile and make the most of it - try and make it work and if I don't get anything from them (as I'm talking collectively about my DH's sister and my brother's wife) then when I leave I have a good rant to my DH and I know that at least I tried and that each time I try because that makes me a better person to hope that one day I will see them and they'll actually respect me.

I always try to do the right thing. I just am starting to feel like why should I try so hard when he doesn't. Oh well. I will probably just see him one day and then it will be over with.

I am sorry to read about your troubles with your siblings Tilly and Rachie. I know everyone has their family problems. I hope one day I can have an honest talk with my brother and tell him how I really feel, knowing he wont like what I have to say, but so we can have a new start. But then again, I don't think that can be possible. People are just people, and yes, those people are family too.