Baby-Love

If and when I do get the time to fall asleep, I am waking up from having horrible nightmares.
I keep dreaming I am walking with Kaida in my arms, then something will occur which makes me drop her.
I've had these nightmares on numerous occasions now.

I came out of the bank the other day and I didn't see the step. I almost lost my balance as I was holding her, and it took me a while to calm my nerves.

I know my nightmares are caused by that almost incident.. but the nightmares are getting more graphic. It's getting to the point I am paranoid when I carry her. I know it's stupid, but it's rather upsetting.
When I have these nightmares I hear her screaming in pain and I can't get the sound of that out of my head..not to mention how she looks after I drop her.
Like one where I dreamt I slid on the wet bathroom floor and I landed on her..
There was blood everywhere.
Today I had a nap and I dreamt I dropped her on concrete steps and it cut through her head.

It's enough to bring me to tears.. I woke up with my eyes filled with tears.

My other half says I'm just being silly and to try and forget them..but it's easier said than done.

Elli21

I know what it is like to have nightmares and it is hard to get them out of your head. But reasure yourself that you'd do anything in any situation to make sure that your daughter is safe.

A technique i tried and found successful was thinking of positive thoughts whilst im laying in bed ready to go to sleep. It set me up for a nice dream instead of a nasty one.

BeckyBoo

You sound really anxious. It's nothing more than the fact you're so scared of your daughter gettting hurt, and you being the one that does it. Every parent is like this, but your body is taking it one more step forward. Which it isn't nice for you, it sounds horrible.

I would suggest voicing your views to your GP, perhaps they can help you with some sleeping pills.

Baby-Love

Thanks..

I don't know if I'd feel comfortable taking sleeping pills, in case I don't wake up for her. The other half sleeps like he's in a coma.

Until then I'll just have to try and think more positive.