General Chatter

Iwantone!!! · May 31st, 2008, 22:42 PM

aaaww hunni xxx

Rachel16+Bump · May 31st, 2008, 23:07 PM

I feel so awful for sayin those things to him! but i was just sayin how i felt..i'm confused. is it cos i still like him that i feel horrible for tellin him the truth or what? i don't know. i just know one thing for sure, i can't handle his problems as well as my own so from now on, its me an my baby an ok if he wants to play daddy then ok aslong as hes in it for the long run an not just to pop in an out when he feels like it xx

leeanne · Jun 2nd, 2008, 14:23 PM

100% agree with all the replies on this thread. Honey, don't think about him any longer. If he truly wanted to become a part of baby's life, he would call and see how you were, etc. The true test will be after the baby is born. Don't call him, let him call you.

nikky0907 · Jun 2nd, 2008, 15:03 PM

You just can't just apologize for some things...

Now,I would never tell a person to cut a parent out of the child's life but it takes more than DNA to be a parent...
Personally if it was me,he would have to do a lot of making up to be in the baby's life.
Move on,focus on Jayden and yourself...you two are a family and put you two before everything else...

Blob · Jun 2nd, 2008, 15:12 PM

You seem to have such shit time of it recently! I agree with the other girls here also. Hope you feel better soon and you will have your gorgeous little boy to focus on

Rachel16+Bump · Jun 2nd, 2008, 15:53 PM

Thanks girls .. i am just going to focus on me and my baby, if Adam wants to be involved then he has to prove himself first an do a whole load of groveling! then ok i will consider it but for now, my baby is my priority.

xx

GemGems · Jun 2nd, 2008, 16:31 PM

Me personally, i would never stop my babies dad seeing him/her, no matter what. Even if he was in prison or had drug/drink problems, i'd still allow supervised access in those cases. Unfortunately, you cant force him to be a responsible parent, he has to learn this in his own time. It may take a while but he'll come round. The best thing you can do is just incourage him. If he's still young then he's probably scared that being a "responsible" parent means that he cant ever go out or see his friends. Of course thats not the case at all but it just sounds like he's a bit worried/scared!!

I understand your frustrations and i hope things work out for the best.

leedsforever · Jun 2nd, 2008, 16:47 PM

sometimes though I think it can be best for the child to have no contact with daddy....

If daddy keeps letting baby down and is a part time dad this can play far more with a childs emotions than not seeing them at all!!!

I cant remember the amount of times I remember waiting at the window for my dad to come pick me up.... either be late or not turn up!!!

We have a so so relationship now but he will never be a 100% dad.... and it really affected me growing up!!
Times he did have me... I just remember going to the local pub and him on the fruit machine or at his while he watched the football on tv!!!

Rayven · Jun 4th, 2008, 18:25 PM

Hey hun, firsty i can completely sympathise, my ex (father to my two girls) was far too busy going out drinking with his mates & pulling left right and centre to give a rats ar*e about me or the baby when i was pregnant.
Believe me its not worth getting yourself upset about as right now the most important thing is your health and your baby - if he doesn't realise that yet then he's the one missing out, and oe day he will grow up wake up one day and wonder what the hell he's messed up! Keep him informed by text of scan dates and anything major going on & let him know when you go into labour......if he wants to be a part of your babies life he'll start making the effort if not then leave the door open, knowing that you've done what you can to give your baby a good relationship with his/her dad. I know how hard it can be when you just wanna shake him and make him wake up to what he's doing, but you can't force someone to stand up and take responsibility for their kids, its something he'll figure out for himself one day & he'll have to live with the fact that he was a tw*t!
BIG HUGS to you. Keep your chin up hun, you may not have the most supportive baby daddy but you're doing something thats really hard and completely amaxing all by yourself & having been a single mother fo four years after my second was born i know just how rewarding it can be whether the dads actively involved or not. xxxxx

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