| Screwed
A young woman in New York City was severely depressed so she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean.
She went down to the docks and was about to leap into the frigid water when a handsome young sailor saw her tottering on the edge of the pier crying.
He took pity on her and said,
"Look, you've got a lot to live for. I'm off to Europe in the morning and if you like, I can stow you away on my ship. I'll take good care of you and bring you food every day."
Moving closer, he slipped his arm around her shoulder and added,
"I'll keep you happy, and you'll keep me happy."
The girl nodded yes. After all, what did she have to lose? That night, the sailor brought her three sandwiches and a piece of fruit, and they made passionate love until dawn. This continued every night of the trip. Three weeks later, during a routine inspection, she was discovered by the captain.
"What are you doing here?" the Captain asked. "I have an arrangement with one of the sailors," she explained.
"I get food and a trip to Europe and he's screwing me."
"He sure is, lady," the Captain said. "This is the Staten Island Ferry." | 
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