for whatever reason, do you ever find yourself going a teensy bit loopy? My LO won't take my milk from anything but the boob and I've always been happy with it. However, this last week I've been all over the place with it. He's feeding more often and through the night and I'm shattered. Also, things like not having a 'life' bugged me. One of my mummy friends invited me to see New Moon as her OH was babysitting for her (she combined feeds) and I contemplated taking LO with me but OH said it would be too loud for him and unfair. I can't leave him with OH as it's a 20min bus journey each way and then there's the length of the film and he feeds anything from 1-4hourly so it's impossible to predict. I'm also a bit resentful as OH has his xmas do coming up so is going out for a meal, bowling, drinks etc. and I would just love to be able to do that with my mummy friends.

On the other hand I hate the thought of leaving LO and would be worrying about him the whole time I was out and probably not enjoy myself and I love him to bits and know it's not for much longer but this week it all just caught up with me for some reason. Then of course I feel incredibly guilty and selfish which just upsets me more

Don't feel guilty, however much you love him you are still you. Yes, in the scheme of things this is just a short period of time but I too get a bit 'meh' sometimes when others get to go out etc and I can't - I've not had a haircut or a lay in since July! I am panicking too as I HAVE to go back to work in Jan and Ilana still won't take milk from anything but me... It's stressing me out. to you.

BTW did you know Odeon cinemas do Newbie showings where you can take your baby and the lighting and sounds are softer, and noone minds if your baby cries? Might be worth a go?

we saw new moon at the drive-in movies... yes had the baby on my breast!

I do want some holiday cheer as well .... I have some pumped but he refuses the bottle now...

I feel loopy sometimes too. I do. I've decided that in the caveman days well before formula, women would babysit and nurse each others children to give each other a break, and that is why we have two boobies. I would love to go see a film and get a haircut without worrying about LO getting hungry.

My LO sleeps through now so I tried going out with OH the other night once she was down for the night. We only went across the road. 5 mins after we left she woke and cried (I swear she has radar). Her aunt and uncle, who were babysitting, tried to soothe her for nearly an hour then phoned us. We came home and she was hungry It's put me off going out again.

Sometimes I feel very trapped and I do get resentful too. My OH goes out quite often (with my blessing - I know he would do anything to let me go out if he could) and sleeps like a baby (lol - well he sleeps better than me anyway).

i expected OH and I to be equal partners in parenting, but because of the feeding, we aren't at all. Sometimes I feel like I have all the responsibility and that it's not fair. I am not a stay at home mum, I am the main breadwinner in our house and I would say I do more than my fair share of non-motherly or stereotypical 'womanly' roles in addition to looking after LO.

None of this is OH's fault - but I would just like a break at some point.

It helps when I think how fast the time has passed already, and that it is such a short time that I will be bf for when I look at the bigger picture.

My friend refused any drinks other than the breast until she was a year old. I met her mother recently who offered me her phone number if I want to call and chat about anything. She returned to work when my friend was 6 months old. It helped to meet someone who has experienced the same thing. I don't know anyone else who is bf - nevermind without using any bottles - they are all now onto formula and often telling me how liberated they feel having changed.

Hugs

Thanks girls, I feel better knowing I'm not alone! He'll take sips of herbal tea from a cup but he won't take breast milk from anything. Luckily I don't go back to work until he's 8/9 months so hopefully he'll be down to just the night feed by then and on water or formula the rest of the time but it just feels so far away but in reality he shuld hopefully start dropping feeds in a few months when we start weaning and then at least I can go to the shops or whatever without worrying, heh. I'm actually a lot more positive today as he slept 9-6 last night after feeding 6-9 so I've been able to get my head together

Dear Kitten Oh! I do understand! It is really hard being at home with a baby all day, partlicularly as it's such a large shift in your way of life. When a baby comes into the world and becomes the centre of your world, it's amazing but it's also so very, very overwhelming. Adjusting to parenting is really hard and it continues to be hard as you move into toddlerhood. One aspect I still find hard is that my life is all wrapped up in my children, now, and mothering, while DH has had much less change in his lifestyle. It's hard not to complain that it's unfair.

http://www.llli.org/NB/NBMayJun01p84.html is a great article on mother burn out, which is such a big deal; and really common. It's a genuine difficulty, caused by very real physical and social factors. Our heavily gendered society doesn't help, either; the personal is political, as the feminists so rightly assert.

WRT changing to FF; or even introing the odd bottle, do you think it would really make a positive difference? IMHO my breasts are my biggest asset in parenting (no pun intended) - it's the best possible way of comforting a fractious toddler, soothing a crying baby, inducing sleep when I'm exhausted (in both me and DS), it calms, gentles, and nurtures; and I can do it in my sleep. Oh, and BFing gets better! Better and better, the longer you do it; toddler nursing is definately the best bit.

If you contrast that with your FFing friends, well, yes, they can seperate from their babies more easily while the babies are very small if (and it's quite a big if) they can get a babysitter - but the cost of the ease of the seperation is that it's harder to form an attachment....

Anyway, you may disagree with me. I hope that you find a good balance for you and your family - and that the loopiness subsides.....

Melanie

Im in the same boat, we were so worried about boobie rejection that we waited til 8 weeks before trying a bottle and didnt try often enough and now he will not have anything but boob.
It does make me happy that he gets it all from me but it can be tiring and i do often have resentfull feeling to dh...but it is also my choice as i am not working so i can be a sahm to lil baby

I am in the exact same boat as u ladies and all i can say is at least its not 4 ever and there is light at the end of the tunnel. on saying that u no when it does end it will b a very sad event! x

Hi,

I haven't posted on here before but my baby is also exclusively bf and won't take a bottle from me but at the weekend my aunt offered to look after him for an hour or two so I could get some tidying up done so I fed him up before she took him but also left her with some EBM just incase and on the offchance that he might take it... and he did and she said it was no bother but when i got home he still wouldn't take it from me so maybe if someone else tried giving it to him cos he's maybe just used to getting the boob from you and doesn't want anything else x