I think first of all you need to decide what you want to do. Not talk to anyone about it at first until you have it straight in your head, what is your heart telling you. Do you want to breastfeed, or do you want to formula feed or are you happy going onou are. Only when you know what you want to do, can you take the next step.

If the answer is a, I would ignore your HV and you are just going to have to put Adam to the boob all the time for as long as you can. You may have to top up after with bottle but eventually your milk supply will adjust. You are making plenty of milk for him and he is still accepting the breast. It is hard work but it is worth it if this is what you want to do.

The combined feeding is another possibility but this can lead to your milk supply reducing and not being enough. However if this is the best thing for you at this time carry on with it.

If you want to formula feed then do it. The only thing I would say is reduce the expressing gradually, replacing a feed every couple of days at least to stop any engorgement or risk of mastitis.

Coz he wont latch on right and the MW are not helping, all they say is, hes latched on well there, but he cant of coz he keeps coming off then crying and getting himself all worked up, which then gets me all worked up.

I cried for pretty much the whole day yesterday, i do feel very guilty that i have stopped expressing and feeding, Adam is now on fomula and i failed.
He is so much more settled tho, goes every 3 hours on the dot and settled well after each feed rather than looking for more of the breast milk, it just wasnt filling him up.

The expressing was ok, but Jase is home at teh mo, once he goes back to work and the kids go back to school, i will have to get up, express right away to get Adams first feed, then changed and dress him, then Coby, then make sure Charlie and Ethan are up and dressed, then do breakfast and pack lunches and get us all ready and take them to school, as well as try to find the time to shower and get myself dressed, it will just be impossible.

And for other selfish reasons on my part...

I want to wake up in the monring and not be soaked coz i ahvent expressed or feed over night.

I want to have a shower and get out and get dressed without my milk pouring down me making me sticky again.

I want to get through a day without the let down thing make it feel like someone is trying to pull my boob off my chest.

And most of all, i want to go to bed naked and snuggle up with jase!

Very selfish reasons i know, but me and Adam couldnt get on with breast feeding and to carry on expressing will just be to much for me with 3 other kids to look after.

im still really upset about it and i will prob be guilty for a while, friends and family said i wouldnt do it and they were right.

x

We typed and posted our messages at teh same time, only saw this after i posted mine.

Thanks Beanie

As you are prob reading i have made up my mind now, we are all alot calmer so i know it was the right thing to do for us as a family, doesnt stop teh guilt tho.

I phoned my doc to ask for something to help dry up my milk but he told me just to stop and leave them alone, so thats what i have done, my boos are huge but im not in to much pain, the let down relfex is still kicking in to once they get to full they are auto releaving themselfs a bit. Hopefuly in a couple of days they will start to do down and back to normal

x

Just keep an eye on them though. If they start to feel hot, or you have a lump then seek medical advice before it goes into mastitis. I always found heat like a hot shower helped and would help the milk come out too, and there is also the good old cabbage leaf in the bra remedy (stinks after a while bleurgh but oddly enough does work). If you feel fluey at all, then you may have mastitis and need anti biotics.

Adam was mostly bottle feed over the breast anyway but we did change his bottles a couple of times.

i think you can just use bottles right away, the tommi tippi back to nature ones are good, we have gone back to useing those.

Its so nice now to have 1 set of bottle/teat shapes and 1 type of milk for him, rather than 3 different type bottles (\Dr Brown, Back to nature and breast) and 2 different taseing milks (fomular and breast)
Adam is so much more settled.

x

Hi Layla you know what I just typed a post that took me half an hour and it got lost grr so I will write it again......

Dont feel bad hun,you have done what is right for you and you gave it your best shot and that is great,also Adam is thriving and a happy soul and will be even happier with a relaxed calm mummy. I used to give all bottles to Amelia and feed once a day,still only feed once a day which meant my milk has decreased and I have never had that horrid engorged feeling (hate that).

But my HV said to try Andrews Liver salts apparently they dry your milk up quickly,so maybe worth a bash.

Please dont feel guilty you have done nothing wrong you are an excellent mother please remember this.

Bex.x

Layla I'm glad you're happy with your decision and I hope things settle for you now. You gave it a good shot and it didn't work out, I know I couldn't express full time whilst looking after 3 other kids, it would be really hard!

There is no point feeling guilty or upset, you tried, it didn't work out and that's that. Feeling down about it wont do you or Adam any good. So chin up and carry on enjoying your little boy

Hi Layla, I have just seen this thread-u should have text me hun!

Anyhoo-good on you for making a decision and making one thats obvioulsy making you feel happier, as happy mummy=happy baby!

You're reasons are not at all selfish, breast feeding is the hardest thing Ive done, and my hats go off to those who can continue throughout baby's first year of life

HOWEVER-I have given up now too-12 weeks I lasted, but Lucy is having some sort of growth spurt as she is taking so much milk its unbelievable and I was starting to resent feeds because I felt she was glued to me 24-7 and poor Rebecca was pushed to the side.

I am happier now, I can measure how much she is taking and how often etc, and it seems to fill her for longer so I get time to play with Rebecca who is kicking out at the moment.

Don't feel guilty, you know your kids better than anyone and you know what's right for the both of you!

mwah

xx

thanks guys

Kx, thats another reason why i didnt get on with breast feeding, When Adam was on breast milk it didnt seem to fill him up, he would feed so often and i never got to spend any time with Coby, i hated that so much and he was suffering from it. When i started expressing it was easier coz Jase could do some feeds and i could play with Coby, but i realised that when Jase goes back to work on Monday my time would be taken up again by expressing and feeding, i didnt want to push Coby out and make him upset again, hes only just got back to his normal happy self

x

Yeah, ive got the tommi tippi bottles. And i have now gone to formula, i know exactly how you feel, i feel like i have failed too, although you havnt, its what works best for you really.

My left boob is totally knacking today and it is so hard to stop myself from feeding him just so the pain goes away!