Real honest advice...

Irishmum · Oct 8th, 2008, 11:42 AM

OK....so my mum is great. Marvellous really. And she has been instumental in helping me get back on my feet after my ordeal of a labour. Now, sometimes when Alex wakes she is so hungry she screams bloody murder and cries her little heart out, tears and all. Some people have reprimanded me for going over and picking her up and trying to get her bottle heated while she's in my arms. They say it's a bad habit to get into. But my mother says that if we leave her scream like that she could do herself damage so I have to pick her up.

Either way, no matter what I do (depending on who's there) I feel like a bad mother, and I know I shouldn't because as soon as she gets her bottle (which is never long after she wakes) she's fine.

So my question for you ladies is, whats your opinion on this let her cry it out? Pick her up? And can she actually hurt herself by crying this way?

Sorry for rambling, and thanx for reading!

x

doumauk · Oct 8th, 2008, 12:15 PM

I dont think it hurts for her to cry while you get her bottle ready.Even though I breastfeed, when salim wakes up to be fed I try to let him wait 5-15 minutes sucking on his dummy before I feed him because I find he feeds better that way. If I put him straight on he only feeds for 10 minutes then sleeps again.If I let him wait a little he feeds for 20-30. Thats just me though.

1st_baby · Oct 8th, 2008, 12:24 PM

I used to pick max up at every lil cry ..he was just like Your LO he would get up and be starving I would rush to get his bottle done and drop lots of things at the same time ..I realized that I dont work well under pressure lol so I decided to give him his dummy and walk away and do the bottle ..he cried yeah but I made his bottle and once he was fed he was fine .

it wont hurt for them to cry for a few min .. after all its there way of communication right now ..ours is talking theres is crying and screaming ..

Although Im wondering now mabey if i cry and scream when i want something done bu DH mabey it will work lol

xxleannexx · Oct 8th, 2008, 12:31 PM

summers normally fine now but there will be the odd occasion when she gets hungry and has a hissy fit, but to be honest i just leave her whilst i do it as it would only take longer and be more hassle trying to make a bottle whilst holding her. its only a few mins of crying which you know is just because there hungry so dont worry.

AppleBlossom · Oct 8th, 2008, 12:37 PM

I've been told my MW that after 3 moths to start letting them cry it out if need be. Before then they are so little and frightened, a hug isn't going to do them any harm and they just want to be clost to their mum. Grace is always after attention and I end up giving in. It's probably a bad habit to get in to but if you don't feel comfortable letting her cry then you do whats best

Irishmum · Oct 8th, 2008, 12:38 PM

Thanx ladies. Nice to know Im not making a complete mess of everything. Some people really seem to have a knack for making me feel like I am though. Some people seem to think that bacause your a single parent that translates as incompetant. So when it comes to things like her crying I want to be sure I'm not doin the wrong thing.

nikky0907 · Oct 8th, 2008, 13:15 PM

I think that either way you certainly aren't doing a bad job! People are stupid and should just mind their own business.
I don't know how old she is.I pick Lola-Rose up when she starts crying and then make up a bottle...I just want to cuddle her.
But of course you can let her cry it out if you feel that she needs it.

Serene123 · Oct 8th, 2008, 13:18 PM

Jesus christ woman, do what the hell you want, it's your baby! Don't ever question yourself because of what other people think. They have their opinons, you review them all, and you do what's best for you. If you want to pick her up and carry her, you do that, if you want her to cry it out, you do that instead. Your baby is coming to no harm either way.

Tezzy · Oct 8th, 2008, 13:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by toriaaaaTRASH

Jesus christ woman, do what the hell you want, it's your baby! Don't ever question yourself because of what other people think. They have their opinons, you review them all, and you do what's best for you. If you want to pick her up and carry her, you do that, if you want her to cry it out, you do that instead. Your baby is coming to no harm either way.

totyally agree with Tor!

your baby, your choices

sam's mum · Oct 8th, 2008, 14:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tezzy

Quote:

Originally Posted by toriaaaaTRASH

Jesus christ woman, do what the hell you want, it's your baby! Don't ever question yourself because of what other people think. They have their opinons, you review them all, and you do what's best for you. If you want to pick her up and carry her, you do that, if you want her to cry it out, you do that instead. Your baby is coming to no harm either way.

totyally agree with Tor!

your baby, your choices

Completely agree! It won't do her any harm to let her cry, but if you want to pick her up to calm her down while you get her bottle ready then do it. At her age she's just getting used to not being with you 24 hours a day as she has been for 9 months, and picking her up every time she cries won't do any harm at all. Sounds like you're doing a great job

x

Oct 8th, 2008, 11:42 AM	#1
Irishmum Other Active BnB Member Join Date: Jul 2008 Posts: 456	Real honest advice... OK....so my mum is great. Marvellous really. And she has been instumental in helping me get back on my feet after my ordeal of a labour. Now, sometimes when Alex wakes she is so hungry she screams bloody murder and cries her little heart out, tears and all. Some people have reprimanded me for going over and picking her up and trying to get her bottle heated while she's in my arms. They say it's a bad habit to get into. But my mother says that if we leave her scream like that she could do herself damage so I have to pick her up. Either way, no matter what I do (depending on who's there) I feel like a bad mother, and I know I shouldn't because as soon as she gets her bottle (which is never long after she wakes) she's fine. So my question for you ladies is, whats your opinion on this let her cry it out? Pick her up? And can she actually hurt herself by crying this way? Sorry for rambling, and thanx for reading! x

Status: Offline

Oct 8th, 2008, 12:15 PM	#2
doumauk Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: North England Posts: 358	I dont think it hurts for her to cry while you get her bottle ready.Even though I breastfeed, when salim wakes up to be fed I try to let him wait 5-15 minutes sucking on his dummy before I feed him because I find he feeds better that way. If I put him straight on he only feeds for 10 minutes then sleeps again.If I let him wait a little he feeds for 20-30. Thats just me though.

Status: Offline

Oct 8th, 2008, 12:24 PM	#3
1st_baby Mum (Mom) Inactive Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: montreal Posts: 3,873	I used to pick max up at every lil cry ..he was just like Your LO he would get up and be starving I would rush to get his bottle done and drop lots of things at the same time ..I realized that I dont work well under pressure lol so I decided to give him his dummy and walk away and do the bottle ..he cried yeah but I made his bottle and once he was fed he was fine . it wont hurt for them to cry for a few min .. after all its there way of communication right now ..ours is talking theres is crying and screaming .. Although Im wondering now mabey if i cry and scream when i want something done bu DH mabey it will work lol

Status: Offline

Oct 8th, 2008, 12:31 PM	#4
xxleannexx Mum (Mom) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Lichfield, UK Posts: 1,277	summers normally fine now but there will be the odd occasion when she gets hungry and has a hissy fit, but to be honest i just leave her whilst i do it as it would only take longer and be more hassle trying to make a bottle whilst holding her. its only a few mins of crying which you know is just because there hungry so dont worry.

Status: Offline

Oct 8th, 2008, 12:37 PM	#5
AppleBlossom Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Liverpool, UK Posts: 25,860	I've been told my MW that after 3 moths to start letting them cry it out if need be. Before then they are so little and frightened, a hug isn't going to do them any harm and they just want to be clost to their mum. Grace is always after attention and I end up giving in. It's probably a bad habit to get in to but if you don't feel comfortable letting her cry then you do whats best

Status: Offline

Oct 8th, 2008, 12:38 PM	#6
Irishmum Other Active BnB Member Join Date: Jul 2008 Posts: 456	Thanx ladies. Nice to know Im not making a complete mess of everything. Some people really seem to have a knack for making me feel like I am though. Some people seem to think that bacause your a single parent that translates as incompetant. So when it comes to things like her crying I want to be sure I'm not doin the wrong thing.

Status: Offline

Oct 8th, 2008, 13:15 PM	#7
nikky0907 Mum (Mom) Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: New England, USA Posts: 11,326	I think that either way you certainly aren't doing a bad job! People are stupid and should just mind their own business. I don't know how old she is.I pick Lola-Rose up when she starts crying and then make up a bottle...I just want to cuddle her. But of course you can let her cry it out if you feel that she needs it.

Status: Offline

Oct 8th, 2008, 13:18 PM	#8
Serene123 Other Active BnB Member Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 32,048	Jesus christ woman, do what the hell you want, it's your baby! Don't ever question yourself because of what other people think. They have their opinons, you review them all, and you do what's best for you. If you want to pick her up and carry her, you do that, if you want her to cry it out, you do that instead. Your baby is coming to no harm either way.

Status: Offline

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