leaving baby for first time

Eternal · Mar 20th, 2010, 07:43 AM

When did everyone start leaving baby?

When he was about 4 weeks old hubby and i had a terrible sickness bug and SIL took him for a few hours for us (she lives accross the road) but i cried the entire time and felt like a bad mum.

Hubby keep mentioning going to the cinema or something and leaving baby and i just cant, i would feel so terrible ... am i just being selfish?

thing is hubbys family dont really bother and baby doesnt really know them and its not like they offer or anything so i really would feel like i am just dumping him with stragers who i dont even think want to have him.

we have a night out in June, and asked his parents to baby sit then which they agreed, so in June i will leave him, if i had my family around i prob would but his family dont really bother much with him or us so it feels wrong.

Am i being selfish to hubby, should i just leave him?

anothersquish · Mar 20th, 2010, 07:57 AM

Do what you feel comfortable with

From Theo being 6 days old I have left him with his daddy for an hour in the morning and/or an hour to two hours in the evening every single day. Was hard at first especially as I decided not to leave bottles for him but instead time my going out to right after a feed so he wouldnt be hungry til I got back (I do have fresh and frozen EBM at all times just incase)
Im ok with it now as I know hes perfectly ok and he and daddy really enjoy thier time without me around!!

If you arent comfortable enough to leave him for a while then dont just yet, wait til you feel ready!

Eternal · Mar 20th, 2010, 08:12 AM

thanks ... would be fine leaving him with hubby but not with the in laws lol ... thanks feel much better about it now.

jojo2605 · Mar 20th, 2010, 08:24 AM

when you're ready is the right time and not before in my opinion!

I left sam with my mom last friday for the first time as me and OH went to the cinema. Other than that I leave him with OH occasionally but not very often!! So yep 6 months for me. And even though I've done it once I don't really feel the need to do it all that often. I would rather either me or my OH go out seperately for a few months with just the odd time us both going out.

WHen someone does baby sit as well i would rather they come to our house as Sam is in his own surroundings and then we can actually put him to bed ourselves before we go out!

Mynx · Mar 20th, 2010, 08:30 AM

Definately only leave him if you feel ready and comfortable

Otherwise you'll be fretting the whole time you're out and you wont enjoy the night out that you're more than entitled to

We're going on holiday to visit OH's family in April and OH's parents have offered to look after Evie if we want to go out and I have no qualms about this as I know she'll be in safe hands. They see her every week and have plenty of contact with her. They know her little quirks and her likes and dislikes so I really wont be worried. Altho I will be ringing them every hour

But I think if I was in your situation and OH's parents didnt know her as well as they do, then I probably would feel the same as you hun

Do what you feel is right x

billybump · Mar 20th, 2010, 08:40 AM

I have left my son with my parents a couple of times for half an hour or so and have had hubbys mum watch him whilst i sleep a few times. But I'm going to be leaving him in may with hubbys parents so we can go to a wedding and I'm dreading it, as bubs screams when they hold him. I'm passing on going to the hen party as I can't leave him plus as I'm breastfeeding I can't see it being practical.

Kota · Mar 20th, 2010, 09:27 AM

my OH is currently the only one I've left LO with. He takes him every sat morning for 2-3 hrs so i can have some time to do whatever i want.
Coming up though we've hot a couple of things on, a friend is babysitting for 2hrs so we can go have a meal out for our wedding anniversary, then i'm going to the theatre with some girlfriends so will be away from him for about 5hrs,

and in may the gransparents are looking after him for the night as we have our leaving do with mates... that one i'm dreading tbh...

Eternal · Mar 20th, 2010, 11:52 AM

Thanks ladies ... He is such an easy baby so it wont be hard for anyone but he is such a part of me it would feel like leaving my arm behind :S thing is hubby wont go out with his mates, i wanted him to go out a couple of weeks ago, it was only to the cinema and he wouldnt go without me ... which is really annoying because he really wants to and i really dont lol!

cleckner04 · Mar 20th, 2010, 13:06 PM

I've still never left Emma with anyone. DH watches her long enough for me to shower but that is it. I'm just not comfortable leaving her too long. Even when DH has her I just don't know what to do with myself and I end up hovering around him.

Do whatever you feel comfortable with hun! Your baby, your rules.

Mar 20th, 2010, 07:43 AM	#1
Eternal Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Swansea, Wales Posts: 6,624	leaving baby for first time When did everyone start leaving baby? When he was about 4 weeks old hubby and i had a terrible sickness bug and SIL took him for a few hours for us (she lives accross the road) but i cried the entire time and felt like a bad mum. Hubby keep mentioning going to the cinema or something and leaving baby and i just cant, i would feel so terrible ... am i just being selfish? thing is hubbys family dont really bother and baby doesnt really know them and its not like they offer or anything so i really would feel like i am just dumping him with stragers who i dont even think want to have him. we have a night out in June, and asked his parents to baby sit then which they agreed, so in June i will leave him, if i had my family around i prob would but his family dont really bother much with him or us so it feels wrong. Am i being selfish to hubby, should i just leave him?

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Mar 20th, 2010, 07:57 AM	#2
anothersquish Mum (Mom) Inactive Join Date: Jun 2009 Posts: 5,415	Do what you feel comfortable with From Theo being 6 days old I have left him with his daddy for an hour in the morning and/or an hour to two hours in the evening every single day. Was hard at first especially as I decided not to leave bottles for him but instead time my going out to right after a feed so he wouldnt be hungry til I got back (I do have fresh and frozen EBM at all times just incase) Im ok with it now as I know hes perfectly ok and he and daddy really enjoy thier time without me around!! If you arent comfortable enough to leave him for a while then dont just yet, wait til you feel ready!

Status: Offline

Mar 20th, 2010, 08:12 AM	#3
Eternal Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Swansea, Wales Posts: 6,624	thanks ... would be fine leaving him with hubby but not with the in laws lol ... thanks feel much better about it now.

Status: Offline

Mar 20th, 2010, 08:24 AM	#4
jojo2605 Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Brummyland Posts: 2,580	when you're ready is the right time and not before in my opinion! I left sam with my mom last friday for the first time as me and OH went to the cinema. Other than that I leave him with OH occasionally but not very often!! So yep 6 months for me. And even though I've done it once I don't really feel the need to do it all that often. I would rather either me or my OH go out seperately for a few months with just the odd time us both going out. WHen someone does baby sit as well i would rather they come to our house as Sam is in his own surroundings and then we can actually put him to bed ourselves before we go out!

Status: Online

Mar 20th, 2010, 08:30 AM	#5
Mynx Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: NW London, UK Posts: 8,297	Definately only leave him if you feel ready and comfortable Otherwise you'll be fretting the whole time you're out and you wont enjoy the night out that you're more than entitled to We're going on holiday to visit OH's family in April and OH's parents have offered to look after Evie if we want to go out and I have no qualms about this as I know she'll be in safe hands. They see her every week and have plenty of contact with her. They know her little quirks and her likes and dislikes so I really wont be worried. Altho I will be ringing them every hour But I think if I was in your situation and OH's parents didnt know her as well as they do, then I probably would feel the same as you hun Do what you feel is right x

Status: Offline

Mar 20th, 2010, 08:40 AM	#6
billybump Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: yorkshire dales Posts: 658	I have left my son with my parents a couple of times for half an hour or so and have had hubbys mum watch him whilst i sleep a few times. But I'm going to be leaving him in may with hubbys parents so we can go to a wedding and I'm dreading it, as bubs screams when they hold him. I'm passing on going to the hen party as I can't leave him plus as I'm breastfeeding I can't see it being practical.

Status: Offline

Mar 20th, 2010, 09:27 AM	#7
Kota Other BnB Elite Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: In a land down under.. Posts: 10,360	my OH is currently the only one I've left LO with. He takes him every sat morning for 2-3 hrs so i can have some time to do whatever i want. Coming up though we've hot a couple of things on, a friend is babysitting for 2hrs so we can go have a meal out for our wedding anniversary, then i'm going to the theatre with some girlfriends so will be away from him for about 5hrs, and in may the gransparents are looking after him for the night as we have our leaving do with mates... that one i'm dreading tbh...

Status: Offline

Mar 20th, 2010, 11:52 AM	#8
Eternal Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Swansea, Wales Posts: 6,624	Thanks ladies ... He is such an easy baby so it wont be hard for anyone but he is such a part of me it would feel like leaving my arm behind :S thing is hubby wont go out with his mates, i wanted him to go out a couple of weeks ago, it was only to the cinema and he wouldnt go without me ... which is really annoying because he really wants to and i really dont lol!

Status: Offline

Mar 20th, 2010, 13:06 PM	#9
cleckner04 Mum (Mom) BnB Spammer Elite Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: San Diego, CA Posts: 21,311	I've still never left Emma with anyone. DH watches her long enough for me to shower but that is it. I'm just not comfortable leaving her too long. Even when DH has her I just don't know what to do with myself and I end up hovering around him. Do whatever you feel comfortable with hun! Your baby, your rules.

Status: Offline

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