Shalagirl's TTC Journal

Ok...not totally sure how this whole journal thingie works. Had a wee look around some of the other ladies journals and think u just write what you wanna write - what u have been up to, how u feel, have a rant and just generally get things of ur chest. Hope that's right???

Anyway thought I would give this a go mainly as I got my AF today and just wanted to vent a bit and didn't think it was fair to moan and rant on and on in the TTC section so I guessed it was more kind of a journal entry.

So AF arrived exactly 5 weeks to the day after my loss. Was v disappointed as it means I just have to keep trying again, another month. I know lots of ladies have been trying longer me and I should accept it takes time but I am impatient and feel my biological clock ticking at 33. I wanna be a young mum with lots of energy for my baby.

Have been taking my pregnecare vitamins and have started to take my evening promise oil tablets again today. Still debating to join the gym even for 6 week membership not I know I am defo not preg this month. Will sleep on it and decided tomorrow.

I guess u post a wee bit every day in ur journal so I'll b back. Off to watch BB and have a lovely Asda's own bounty bar they are delicious.

Welcome to the journal section!!! I too was unsure, but it's seriously the best place for a rant and to get to know others better plus the support is unbelievable.

Sorry to hear of your loss. I hope you will see a BFP asap and your journal will make history as the shortest one ever!!!

All the best for your ttc journey....

x.

Hi Shalagirl and welcome to the journals!
So sorry to hear about your loss. Boo for the :witch: arriving.
You are certainly not alone here.
:hug:

Thanks Newbie77 & Munchkin for welcoming me to journal land. Hey Munchkin see ur from Northern Ireland too. Thanks for ur words of suport about my loss. I am v sad about it and at times just wish I still had my baby but I am realistic in a way that it was early and I never had a chance for it to sink in.

Am getting sooooooooo fed up with my weight and feel stuck in a rut about how to over come it. I know I eat way too much - chocolate, biscuits etc I could well do without. In the past I belonged to the local gym and did enjoy going but really I have no motivation to rejoin even on 6 week membership. I know I should get off my bum and go do something to turn the situation around and stop feeling so unhappy - I feel overweight, I feel depressed, I eat, I feel more overweight, I feel more depressed, I eat more and so the cycle continues.

I asked my DH to go the gym with me but he said the gym wasn't his thing!!!! I asked him if I could bring the strider exercise machine I have (it was given to me ages ago) into the house from the garage as I feel cold and lonely out their on my own striding with all our junk in the garage - and he said no there was no where suitable to have it in the house!!!!

I am worried that being alittle over weight is gonna effect my chances of ttc and I wanna feel fitter and healthier in general but I just feel trapped in a cycle of self destruction. All my DH does is sit on his computer and watch films I'd like him to support me more and help me kick start some kind of exercise routine, but at the end of the day I guess its down to me to do something about it, not him, I guess I just want the company.

Still about two weeks till I start ovulating. Been turing on my CBFM each day but so far it hasn't asked for any sticks so looks like I might just be using the 10 sticks this month and it prob won't ask for the 1st stick until about day 12.

Gonna have an exciting weekend!!- cleaning the house tomorrow morning and waiting in for my new tumbldryer to be delievered tomorrow. So fed up of my house smelling of wet washing.

Ok next post I am to have completed some exercise - here's hoping.

:hi: Welcome to the journals. Here's some dust for you:
:dust: :dust:

Hi Shalagirl!
Hope you have a good weekend, hun!
I'm with you on the weight thing - I'll write more in detail tomorrow or in a couple of days as I'm just heading away.
:hug:
Mx

Why oh why does waiting for ovulation take sooooooooooo long???? Still getting lows on my CBFM not prob not get a high for a day or two yet. I want a nice short 28 day cycle on a long 33 day one so things would speed up abit.

Feeling ok generally, trying to cut down on what I am eating (not doing so great) and still no motivation to do any major exercise. Tonight I have a few things to do for work and then watch Big Brother!

Have been considering doing a night class as I have taken a few classes in the past. Considering line dancing. Will have to decide soon as its enrolement time. Just want a hobby, something to occupy myself, lift my mind and perhaps socialise abit. Need to have a think about what I might do.

I hear ya! Waiting for ovulation is the worst, then the 2ww is even worse than waiting for ovulation! :shrug: No balance. :nope:

Hi Shalagirl

Thanks for dropping by my journal - thought I would pop in on you! Just wanted you to know that I know exactly what you mean about the exercise cycle thing. I gave up the gym earlier in the year as I thought it was contributing to not being able to ttc and I was really busy at work. Since then I've managed to put on about 2 thirds of a stone and can't shift it. As you say, I get depressed about ttc and then eat and then get more depressed about the weight.

I've managed to work up a bit more of a PMA since joining B&B and this cycle I have gone back to jogging. I've managed to go three times so far and it really does make me feel better. Give something you enjoy a go and I'm sure you'll feel the benefit. I'll pop by to see how you're doing and give you some support!

I'm very sorry to hear of your loss and I wish you a sticky bean very soon.
:hugs:

Welcome to the journal section hun, I'm so sorry for your loss and wish you the best of luck while TTC :hugs:

Hi Shalagirl, Hope you are doing well. You are one day closer to OV :happydance: even though it might still feel like it's ages away.

On the weight thing, it drives me bonkers! I just can't seem to shift my pregnancy weight anymore - exercise has helped a little, but now it's come to a complete standstill. But hey, I will continue being good even if I'm not shedding the pounds, I still feel a lot better for doing it.

Line dancing sounds like fun! Would your DH do it with you?

Ooooh Line Dancing! I have 2 left feet I'm afraid. :blush:
Good luck catching that eggy!
:dust: :dust:

Having a good day today - went for a nice aerobic walk with my DH down at the beach and then had lunch out. Was kinda good as I had carrot soup and wheaten bread (instead of a fry which my DH had) but then I had a caramel sqaure tray bake - it was so yummy.

Ur right Munchkin getting closer to ovulation - think Mon, Tue, Wed of next week will be the key days to get Bding!!! Just hope life and work doesn't get in the way and we're not in the mood - can just see that happening as DH has to work late on night and I have to go to meeting the next!!! Am planning on leaving the meeting early to get home to bd if it runs on too late (just need to think of a good excuse to get me home early, can't really say have to go off to bd!!!).

DH has gone out so as I my PMA is on a high now am off to do an aerobics exercise video (maybe should warm the neighbours their house is about to shake!!!).

Yay! Good girl with the exercise!
I say arm yourself with some massage oil, sexy lingerie, light some candles and you should be ready to go!!
Keep us posted on how it goes!
:hug:

Got really caught out by the witch yesterday :sad2:

Wasn't expecting AF to arrive at all as it was about 3 days early. On the plus side I can start trying again sooner than I expected and hopfully my ovulation might tie in with my wee weekend away for DH's birthday in 2 weeks. :happydance:

My CBFM has really been confusing me with about 13 highs in a row and then on the 20th stick one low so am really confused about when I ovulate. Went out today and bought a BBT thermometer from Boots and joined fertility friend so I am going to temp everyday. Hopefully this will help pinpoint my ovulation. Was an expensive day as also bought another box of CBFM sticks at £20!!!

Went to the gym this morning for nearly one hour - so proud of myself. Do think my recent sprint at the gym and aerobics again over the past two weeks may have helped shorten my cycle length down this month arriving on day 30 rather than 33.

Am going to order som opk cheapies from the internet after I type this. So my plan of attack for this month is:

- start tempting from tomorrow morning
- use my CBFM
- use internet cheapie opk
- have a wee weekend away around ovulation (fingers crossed)
- keep taking my Pregnacare vitamins
- keep up my exercise (gym and or aerobics at least 3 times a week - oh plus my line dancing class starts this tuesday)

So want it all to work this month.

Good luck to you Shalagirl! Hope this cycle ends in a :bfp: for you! FX!

Good Luck for this cycle! Love your PMA (Positive Mental Attitude)

here's some :dust: to get you started!

Welcome to the journals and good luck for this cycle

So took my temp for the first time this morning. Not too to sure if I did it right. I know ur meant to take ur tempt as soon as we wake up and not move out of bed but once it hits 6am I kind off wait up slowly - glancing at the clock every 15 mins or so and then turning over for abit more sleep. Anyway really needed the loo about 6.30am so though I should take my tempt before I went so did that and then got back into bed until aboout 9am.

Am about to enter my new data on FF which is kinda exciting. I just can't wait for a nice plotted graph at the end of the month.:happydance:

Good luck to you this cycle!

:hug:

Sorry she got you hun.
Was that your first cycle using the CBFM? It does say that you might get plenty of highs the first cycle.
Best of luck for the shiny new cycle!
:hug:

...so...
just had a wee weekend away with the DH and bd a few times!!!

Best thing was on Saturday morning got a PEAK on my CBFM the first one I've got on my 3rd month using it. Got another PEAK today so I am sooooooo pleased. Really really crossing my fingers this month.

The peaks seem to have matched it with my temps as they jumped up today but I guess another day or two of tempting will tell for sure. Also did a cheapie opk on Sat afternoon and it had a nice dark line and this seems defo like ovulation time. So happy.

Oh I am having such an emotional day all because of FF and my temps. My temp this morning fell back to the coverline and it has totally wiped me of all hope for this month. I've had a real good cry to my dh this morning and am about to start some housework and know I'll be hovering, washing up & cleaning the bath with tears in my eyes. AF hasn't actually shown up just my temp today is making me feel like its over for another month.

You really have to dig deep and find something inside you to keep you going each month and the highs and lows of a cycle are such a roller coaster.

So everyone cross ur fingers that my temps miracalously jump up again tomorrow and the old witch stays away. I really believe God has a plan for my life and I would love to tell my mum about ttc as I know she will pray for us on our journey but on the other hand I also don't know if I could cope with 'well any news yet' and her waiting for a baby as well as us.

Please look at my chart anyone and tell me what you think. I would so love todays low to be just a blip, although my swinging emotions today also indicate the witch is about to call.

So the old witch arrived YET AGAIN this morning. Even though I was half expecting it it was so surprising how much hope I was clinging on to right until she showed up.

Looked at the stats now and it will around the 8 -10th Dec b4 I know if I am successful next month. I would soooooooooo love to know I am preggers for Christmas.

Am goin to start taking EPO again along with my Pregnacare tablets. Might seek out some B vits when I am at the shops next although the Pregnancare might already contain them.

Think I really need to focus the bding from about the 20th Nov when would be about 4 days before ovulation. Usually try to tell DH it's time to go each month but might try to keep him in the dark abit so he feels less pressured.

So there we go another month begins....

:hug:

Heres a truck load of dust for your next cycle:


:dust::dust::dust::dust::dust:
:dust::dust::dust::dust::dust:
:dust::dust::dust::dust::dust:
:dust::dust::dust::dust::dust:
:dust::dust::dust::dust::dust:

Oh I am having such an emotional day all because of FF and my temps. My temp this morning fell back to the coverline and it has totally wiped me of all hope for this month. I've had a real good cry to my dh this morning and am about to start some housework and know I'll be hovering, washing up & cleaning the bath with tears in my eyes. AF hasn't actually shown up just my temp today is making me feel like its over for another month.

You really have to dig deep and find something inside you to keep you going each month and the highs and lows of a cycle are such a roller coaster.

So everyone cross ur fingers that my temps miracalously jump up again tomorrow and the old witch stays away. I really believe God has a plan for my life and I would love to tell my mum about ttc as I know she will pray for us on our journey but on the other hand I also don't know if I could cope with 'well any news yet' and her waiting for a baby as well as us.

Please look at my chart anyone and tell me what you think. I would so love todays low to be just a blip, although my swinging emotions today also indicate the witch is about to call.


Sorry this wasn't your month :hugs: It took me 10 months to decide whether to tell my mum, same reasons as you I suppose. But I'm glad i did (only last week). She cried with me and it really helped. i do feel much better now and I know I can go to her/phone her when it all gets too much and i don't want to drag dh husband down. Of course, up to you, but mum's are great :hug: