Im 17, Pregnant..Confused!

Hi...ok im 17.. and im about 9 weeks..ive been with my OH for 10 months and he is the same age.. were both in college about to start second year.. we found out a few weeks ago and since have just gone back n forth trying to make a solid decision on what to do!! this is so difficult and im so scared!

i don't want an abortion! i personally just don't feel i could go through with it without regretting it so much! my OH also doesn't want to get rid! but were just lost on where to go from here! both his parents no and aren't mad but think we shouldn't have the baby! i only live with my dad and im so scared to tell him! he is not like normal dads and we argue constantly anyway! my mum doesn't live anywhere near and we dont talk that much so she's no help! i no when i tell my dad he is goin to go mad! and will kick me out!. please trust me i know this..and we cant live at my OH's house its to small!!..

im sorry im ranting i just dont no where to go from here! i/ we want this baby! i no im young and this wasn't planned i was on the pill but its happened! i would just really appreciate any advice or suggestions! thanks... :cry: :hugs: xo

Cant really give any advice...! Only that I was pretty sure my dad would FLIP 2..! he didnt though.! just dont go doing anything u will regret..! theres tones of help out there..! even if u go 2 a womens hostel..! hope all works out ok..! x x

:hugs:

The only people that u should reli be thinking of hun is you, ur OH and the baby in order to make the right decision! Everything else will fall into place with time.
Theres help and support out there hun like the council for housing and things. Just think reli hard before making any decisions. Good Luck

dont do nefin u dont want to, theres always help out there, so dont feel pressured or alone.

good luck xxx

I really hope this all works out for you hun! That really is a tough situation that requires alot of thought. Follow your heart and help is out there like everyone said.
Good Luck:hug:

so guess what we are in the same situation! well except my hubby kind of wants an abortion for the babies sake cause right now we have nothing to give the baby right now. so if you need someone to talk to and support any decision private message me cause i need someone to talk to also.

hey...kellysays2u

it wont let me private u atm i haven't been on long enough.. um but would love to talk poss help each other.. do i need to add u to private message u?

n btw thanks the other ppl for your comments.. :hug:

Hey, not really got any other advice than it is YOUR decision and I hope you make the right one. Remember, having a baby isn't the end of the world. I'm only 19. Good luck! x

Don't let anyone else make the decision for you. Especially not your parents, you're practically an adult, and they can't decide what's best for you now, that's up to you and your OH.

As long as the pair of you want to keep the baby, you're in a pretty strong position. I'm scared of my OH panicking and running away from baby. And me.

As for somewhere to live and money to live on, there are loads of benefits you can claim to help you out til you get on your feet. I'd go and enquire about what you can claim and when. Sign up for free prescriptions while you're pregnant, just incase- You can get a card whilst you're pregnant and for a year after the baby's born... Every little helps!

Just make sure at the end of the day, it's your decision.

Once youve decided what you and your partner want to do .. telling your dad wont seem like the end of the world, because its not!! He may be angry at first but then again he may well suprise you and be happy!!

All i can say is like the other girls have said, it need to be your decision, dont do it for anyone else!!

hey hunni im 16 and preg with a little boy. me and my boyfriend have been together 3 years and im about to start college this year. i know its a huge shock as your so young i know how you feel and i know telling people is the scariest thing in the worl. but it really isnt that bad my dad sounds abit like yours and when i told him he didnt flip (i thought he was gunna go mad) he just said its up to me and he will be there whatever i choose. the rest of my family were shocked but now they have got used to the idea and aare really excited about the lil man joining the family.

as for abortion if you want this baby then DONT get one just cos your scared of what people will think and how you will cope. because you will regret it for the rest of your life hunni.

as for college im nearly 6 months preg and im still going in september, they let you stay on the course and give you maternity leave all that will happen is you might have to stay on a lil bit longer when the course is finished to catch up with what you missed.

being an expectant teen mum is the scariest thing in the world but im glad i didnt get an abortion and now i love this lil boy inside me more that anything

chin up hunni and if you ever need to talk send me a private message :hugs:
xx

ok..thank u all for your comments but its so much worse now!! my dad found out last nite! he went on my laptop and saw these sites bookmarked! which is so unexpected he has never done that b4!! he did go mad! he cant understand y i am even considering keeping the baby! he wants me to get it done rite away! or he said if i do keep it..and trust me he means this..that he taking me back to Ireland! and if i don't come he is going and leaving London and wont have anything to do with us! n to declair myself homeless now and find sumware else!!! Im so lost and have no idea what to do from here!!

Im 17 And 27+5 Pregnant, Like U Ive Been Wif My OH 10 Month. My Pregnancy Was Not Planned But Both Me And My Partner Are Both Really Excitied. As Soon As I Found Out I Was Pregnant I Knew That I Was Keeping My Baby No Other Thought Went Thru My Mind, I Was So Scared About Telling My Parents Thinking The Worst Like They Would Kick Me Out etc But They Didnt, Yeh They Was Shocked But 2 Hours Later They Was Used To The Idea And Fine About It.

No One Can Make A Decision For U But Just Make Sure U Do Wats Right x

If you want to keep the baby; do it. Declare yourself homeless, show your dad you are not going to be bullied into getting rid of YOUR baby!

It wasn't your fault, you were using protection (unlike some silly teens out there) and it just happened. You've already said you don't think you could go through with an abortion and your OH doesn't really want you to get rid either. Your dad can't understand the guilt he would put you through by forcing you to get an abortion.

If it were my dad (more likely to be my mums reaction tho) I'd sit down calmly and tell him you've made the decision, with your OH that you'd like to keep the baby. It was an accident and people do get pregnant on the pill, you were unlucky, but you feel you can't get rid of your own baby. It'll be tough, but you're willing to work hard to support your child and if he doesn't want to support you, you will quite happily try to sort out some other living arrangements if he gives you the time to.

Does he think taking you to Ireland will stop you wanting the baby, or stop you getting pregnant again? He's just tearing you away from your life, your OH and bullying you into getting rid of a child HE won't have to support in a few years. It's your choice, your child and if you are willing to put the work in then you should tell your dad that.

Hi...ok im 17.. and im about 9 weeks..ive been with my OH for 10 months and he is the same age.. were both in college about to start second year.. we found out a few weeks ago and since have just gone back n forth trying to make a solid decision on what to do!! this is so difficult and im so scared!

i don't want an abortion! i personally just don't feel i could go through with it without regretting it so much! my OH also doesn't want to get rid! but were just lost on where to go from here! both his parents no and aren't mad but think we shouldn't have the baby! i only live with my dad and im so scared to tell him! he is not like normal dads and we argue constantly anyway! my mum doesn't live anywhere near and we dont talk that much so she's no help! i no when i tell my dad he is goin to go mad! and will kick me out!. please trust me i know this..and we cant live at my OH's house its to small!!..

im sorry im ranting i just dont no where to go from here! i/ we want this baby! i no im young and this wasn't planned i was on the pill but its happened! i would just really appreciate any advice or suggestions! thanks... :cry: :hugs: xo

hey :hugs: huni first things first is congratulations on the buba :D i would tell your dad, get your oh and his parents in to help you! go to the council and tel them your situation and they should help you :) x

Hey...
I'm 17 too, like you I found it so difficult to make that all important life changing decision and in the end, I decided to keep the baby. I had doubts about the abortion from the start and knew I'd never have the guts to go through with it but my OH wanted, well still sort of wants me to have the abortion :(
My OH still isn't sure of the idea of becoming a dad at the age of 20, but once our parents know, he said he'll be happy but I suppose it's finding the right time.
I really think my dad will support me, although he'll be extremely disappointed in me at first, think once he comes to terms with it he'll be proud to see me doing my best. You never know, your dad may be like that once it sinks in and he sees you doin everything for your LO.
But me and my mum don't exactly see eye to eye... more like worst enemy's if I'm honest and I know she will want to kick me out and probably never talk to me again.
Like everyone has said, there's so much support out there, you'll get through if you decide to keep the LO, just don't make any choices that you're going to regret.
Once you're able to PM, PM me and we'll have a chat :)
Good Luck to both you and your OH xxxx

Oh sweetie, please don't have an abortion. It's not something you want to do. I know you said your dad will go back to England, but could you stay with your OH even for a little while until you can find somewhere to live?
I don't want you regretting your decision as I know you will if you get a termination

Kristie.C.

do what you feel is right, if you feel that you should bring ur baby into this world than by all means do so!. i was 17 when i found out i was pregnant, im now 18 and due in 3 weeks. i thought the same thing as you before telling my own parents, to be completely honest they were pissed at first, mostly dissapointed, and didnt talk to me as much for a couple weeks, but eventually they got use to it and still provided all of their love and support.. that was 5 months ago and now they're siked and cant wait for the baby to be born.. but i deffinately knwo what ur going through. if you want to talk about it you can email me . private msg me to find out what im email is

Hi I'm 17 aswell and about 6 and a half weeks pregnant and sooo excited, my seconds doctors appointment well the first one with the midwife next week :):)

Basically, you're going to end up moving into your own place, away from your dad eventually anyway. If you want to keep the baby, why not do that now? It just means getting your own place a couple years earlier than you intended to. Does your dad think you're going to rely on him for the rest of your life?

It's odd how selfish some parents can be in situations like this, surely their kids need all the support they can get, not to be blackmailed into making the wrong decisions for themselves...

I would talk to your partner about your options now and what you want to do - sure you are worried about your dad - but if your having this baby you are going to have to be an adult now and sort things out for yourself - you will probably find this approach will impress your dad at how grown up you can be. You need to decide where you will live and if one or both of you will get a job to provide an income - babies arent cheap and living on benefits is not fun believe me. Talk to your partner - you have another more important thing coming into your lives and you need to make plans together if this is what you want.

Well, I'm not going to judge you at all because you are in a situation that needs a lot of thought. You know that you have three options, go through with it, have an abortion, or adoption. It really depends on you and what you beleive is right for you. You sound like a bright girl, so I'm sure whatever decision you make will be the right one.

Don't base your decision on the reaction of others because if you do decide to have this baby, you are going to be the one taking care of and raising it, no one else. If you decide to have an abortion, you will have to live with it, and no one else will probably even think about it. And if you go for adoption, again, that's something that you are going to have to deal with.

I suggest writing down the pros and cons of each option and going over it with you OH and you two come to a decision together. If you feel like the only thing that's really confusing you is your living situation and the reaction your father will have when he finds out, I honestly don't think that you should base your decision on that alone because no matter how mad he is at first, he won't stay mad forever and I'm sure he'll want to be a part of your child's/his grandchild's life. And there are so many services that are available for mothers etc. now a days, so finding a place to live, may not be as hard as it may seem right now.

My mother is a very strict lady as well and I was terrified of being pregnant because she always told me that she would put me out if I ever got pregnant. When I felt I was pregnant (didn't know for sure) I had my mind made up that I was going to have an abortion, just so my family wouldn't look down on me. My mom freaked out and continued to freak out throughout my pregnancy. She was VERY angry but, she has turned out to be my number one support system and she loves my daughter so much, and no, she didn't kick me out.

I don't want to make you feel as though you should choose one thing or another because only you know if you are able to handle any of these options. I wish you all the best and I hope that whatever you choose, it's the right choice for you. Goodluck hun.

:hug: :hugs: :hugs: