miss mollys pregnancy journal finally completed :-)

hiya im moving over here from ttc, i have been ttc for a while after have a m/c at 29 weeks and another at 12. As you can imagine this BFP means a hell of alot.

i found out for sure yesterday afternoon, i got an extremely faint test last week but denied that it was positive for my own head although i was feeling very nauseas faint and dizzy with lack of interested in food. i was convinced it was ttc desperation making my head play tricks on me.

yesterday morning the smell of toothpaste made me vomit like nothing i have felt in a long time - i was waiting for a delivery of opks and hpts due today, we were trying to hold out on testing untill then- i got my oh to go to sainsburys to buy a test i felt so sick and awful i needed to know if i was pregnant because it was either that or there was something wrong with me!

before i could even put the stick down and flush the loo there was two lines, i was so thrilled i was shaking!

from past pregnancy s i have learnt that im one of these wonderfully sick people, which is fun. im finding it really hard to eat anything.

this morning so far ive managed to force down on slice of plain toast that was after being sick.

i am yet to go to my doctor, my actual doctor is away untill tommrrow so ill get in there then, im hoping to get early scans this time for my own peace of mind i honestly dont know if ill manage to cope if i lose this one too.

anyways heres to 9 months of journaling

x

i'm so excited 4u! i was telling Jim all about you last night lol.
i've got my 12 week (yes its late!) scan tomorrow & i'm so nervous. i hope you get your early scans xxxx

It's good to see you here and I hope everything goes well and you get that early scan you want. Congrats once again(put it in another thread also)!

thanks ladys :-) i hope your scan goes well

x

Congrats on your bfp hun =)

god emotions are high i feel so down i cant stop crying i dont know what to do with myself

congratulations on your BFP! have a happy and healthy nine months :D

im very hormonal and finding all this a bit strange i cant quite settle in to the 'im pregnant' mind set, oh is over the moon im just sick with worrie

im finding this very weird, im somewhat detached from the situation.

i dont want to allow myself to get into the pregnancy incase i lose it which is very silly because i should be enjoying it after all i begged for this to happen.

i cant think to myself ooo theres a baby in my belly because its too early and something might happen.
am i going to feel like this the whole way through?

when am i going to feel safe enough to enjoy my pregnancy even if i am feeling sick and gassy i refuse to complain about it but it dont feel real, i feel like all the sickness and pos tests are in my head, i wish losing my other babies hadnt screwed me up so much clearly its going to have a negitive impact on this and futre pregnancys.

god im a silly cow.
im going to the doctors today, fingers crossed ill get an early scan.

Congrats hunn on the bfp. The best luck in the world on getting that early scan, and hoping it puts your mind at ease a little that yes you are pregnant. I understand fully why you dont want to believe it's real, but relax and take it easy. Enjoy your pregnancy.

Good morning mommy :hugs:
Just thought I'd come say hi in your brand new pregnancy journal xxx
Try not to worry chick, I know it's easier said than done but try to relax and enjoy it, hopefully I'll be joining you soon xxxxx

:) thank you ladys!

i just got back from my doctors and she sent off a request for an early scan (6/7weeks) for my own peace of mind which i hope gets approved! i really need it to make things real.
she also gave me a load of info most of which i didnt really need but it was nice anyway, and some anti sickness pills :D





fingers crossed eh

THERE IS NO ESCAPING US IN THE TTC SECTION!!!

muahhahahahahah

Actually I just wanted to catch up, but it sounded good didn't it?
Don't go too far, we miss you already!

lol mad ladys, i hope you lot are over here soon i really do it feels really far away!

Oh look, your little bean is 4 weeks and 6 days old. So cute!

Molly, I am so pleased for you and excited too at the idea of someone so deserving (correction, a couple so deserving) of their own little miracle.

Hope the sickness passes, but as you say not to complain as it's for a good reason. Still not pleasant though. Hmmph!

Looking forward to following your journal. There are lots of us here to hold your hand on your journey. :hugs:

i feel very odd today this morning i was ok, and now im shaky and yuk feeling.
i have little or no motivation and im extremely short tempered.

im dreading the impending doom of 530 we are going to my friends house to fix her computer but she has lots of children and im not sure how i can cope with that today.

i have also been roped into face painting next Wednesday for a charity day for kids... am i being touchy or am i just tired?

i just want to curl up in a ball and hide there today. even the nose in the chat room and msn is peing me off.

i have been looking at ways to get an early scan, hopefull i wont have to use anything i have found cause my doctors request for me to be closely monitored should have been listened to.

x

thank you miss mouse:-)

im just fed up today. its a shame that other people who truly deserves their own little bean dont have it yet, its not fair and im slightly bitter that the world is working like that.

5weeks today!
i dont feel as sick which is worrying me a bit.

i need to get my flat sorted out for impending ann summers party on the 9th, im not sure why i agreed to have it to be honest its not even my party.
my awful neighbor is blasting his music again.

the world is full of wondrous people isnt it

I read that you were having what I call 'mashed head syndrome' and perfectly understand you. Thought I'd pop by and fatten out your journal with some more good wishes and happy vibes. I'm looking forward to hearing about your scan and imagine that will be a turning point for you to relax a little more.

Hope things settle down quickly for you and that you can enjoy your pregnancy. You lucky, lucky person you. :hugs:

thank you again.

my head is perfectally mashed right now, thanks for the good terminology!

i got my letter for my scan through this morning, its my 12 week scan which means my early scan letter is still in the post or they havent booked me in i figure i should leave it untill monday/tues then call and kick off till they see me lol.

im feeling less sick, im not sure if thats a good or a bad thing, i think id rather feel sick as a dog then at least i know that the pregnancy is viable.

im nervously waiting for this scan, i dont know how people can get so excited about them, i guess the expierance has been somewhat jaded for me as i now assositate scans with bad things happening.

sticky glue is needed in my womb!

:hugs:

Sending you some sticky womb glue to help

yesterday i was a hormonal hell bitch! but im ok today.

i need to lighten up after all its good to laugh.

i got some strawberry plants today, they are lovely.

i also got a cot and moses basket mattress i gave everything away last time so im gettin myself ready again:-)

Aw, try and chill out a bit hun xxxx
good luck with your early scan...when you get it xxx

im really really down, my other half isnt doin anything wrong but i want to snap his head off. i really sad looking for a new home for my cats and rat:-(
i just want to cry i feel so out of control of my emotions im not sure how much of this is hormones/depression its a clear mix of both but in what quantity's i just dont know.

im more fed up than i can put into words.

Hey hun, I'm soz your feeling down. I know what you mean about how do people get excited by scans because I feel like you I'm excited to go but I know once I get there the fear will set in. Like you posted in my journal where the same pregnant! so we can help each other out, you know give each other a push and a cheer up here and there. What do you think? x

sounds good hun:-)

im back to feeling sick again :D yay

i need to get cracking on sorting my house out for this annsummers party

so much to do

no energy to get it done

im sooooooo tired, im starting to feel like a right lazy cow im up and about for about 2 hours then i got to sleep!

i got my earlier scan today booked for tuesday at 9am, it dawned on me that this will properly be an internal one:S ive never had one before so thatll be fun.

i have been researching early scans and am full prepped for there not to be a heartbeat just yet although ill be 6+4 by then so hopefully there will be.

i have a funny feeling in my belly that says this isnt going to be a good scan but i guess thats just natural!

im feeling a bit more happier than yesterday.

can someone please tell me how to talk to my other half about all these worrys??? he is the most understanding man in the world but everytime he asks me stuff i tell him to go away or shut up and i find all this horrid stuff coming out of my mouth non of which i mean then he shouts at which is totall justified then i cry then we both feel bad its not good!

i need to fix this

molly you're bound to be anxious about your scan. but try to think positively, i know its easier said than done!
when i had my 12 week scan the other week me and oh had rowed all morning about everything and nothing even to the point we were barely speaking in the waiting room and all he'd done was say he was sure everything was fine and didn't want me to worry etc then as soon as we saw the screen and knew everything was ok it was all forgotten... its like tension and nervous energy where you just vent it on someone - the someone always tends to be the person who you're closest to in my case.
i'm sure everything will be fine my fingers are crossed for you.

with regard to the internal scan and the heartbeat - i had internal scan at what I thought was 7 weeks was only actually 5+2 was told they could only see the sac then had another one at 7+2 and all was ok so you're probably right inbetween, they told me that you definitely wouldn't expect to see anything before 6 weeks so dont worry if they don't see the heartbeat hey will probably as you back after a week or so.

sorry for the long post i just wanted to share my related experience

xxxxxx

ow thanks hun, it is all a bit scary but im keepin my fingers crossed.

this mornin it was all drama where i live the police broke down my nextdoor noisey music mans door and they sectioned him!

lol

Oooo I love Drama!!! I'm like the nosiest neighbour!! Well, perhaps not, my own neighbour is shocking!! I'm sure she knows what I'm doing before I do it..

How you doing honey?
15th April Eh? I'll keeping an eye out for your results...
Thats not long before I test ;)

thanks naynay. im keepin everything crossed for your testing day.

i thought id start posting my weekly bump shots this one was taken at 5 weeks no bump yet- lets do a bump watch!

http://i56.photobucket.com/albums/g169/uvlolly/2008_04040126-1.jpg

Good luck with your early scan (I go away for a week on Friday and good things always happen on here while I'm away - so hope its a good omen)

Love the piccy,that flat tummy will be getting a bump soon

thanks sinead!!

i worked really hard to get my tummy flattish again i was nearly a size 20 after i had my daughter i just lost a stone really quick in one go them BAM i get a baby in my belly! i was totally happy about being pregnant but i didnt know weather to laugh or cry about losing my figure again.

last night there was moooore drama, my crazy next door neighbors girlfriend was crying outside cause she had come to visit him and he didnt have a door anymore so i let her in (OMG) she is majorly looupy shes nice but not right at all i let her use the phone to find out what mental hospital he was in and decided she was going to get a taxi there! the mental hopsital in in oxfordshire i live in milton keynes!
then she tryed to give me a handfull of money for being nice to her, my oh came home and she was telling him to be nice to me cause im pregnant she was like shhhh actually does he know, oh he knows great did you know shes pregnant oh i love your hall way iits pink i want to paint my boyfriend room pink its going to cost me 100£ pound to get there but hes worth every penny....it was very odd.

anyway i went over mils to do her cv and when we came back some bloke was standing outside my block of flats asking if i had seen a girl called mel he was convinced she was in my next door neighbors flat which nobody was cause the doors boarded up, he was upset and said she was ment to be in her care home by 8pm. i didnt know where she was and was slightly worried i had given a less then sane person the tools to go to oxford on her own:S

second drama, there was a group of kids fucking around near our car so i kept an eye on them, then they looked like they were trying to get into an empty ground floor flat so i called the police non emergency number, and within second while i was still on the phone 3 police cars turned up (the kids were about 14 and there was three of them) then another car and a riot van turned up it was like something off of cops lol

on the pregnant note, every time i brush my teeth im sick!! proper vile!

Blimey, all is happening where you are Molly. :wacko:

lol i know its crazy

Oh well, at least its something to keep you entertained if that's the right word. It sounds like you are in amongst it!! I totally understand why you are so concerned Molly, I hope you relax as the pregnancy goes on and you can really enjoy it. Hope the scan goes well xxx

You don't need that kind of stress!!

Missy you need to calm yourself and close the blinds to the drama!
Relaxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Lovely shot too

thanks girlys! my god im sick, the 6 week mark is looming and im seriously puking!
im hanging on to nettle and fennel tea the aniseedy ness is settling my tummy
i cant really think of anything to write right now but ill make a long update soon

hello 6 weeks today! ill take a photo later for bump watch!
i have my booking in thing with the midwife today! this thirsty thing is doing my head in i spoke to my doctor yesterday and she mentioned gestational diabetes! she said it was rare this early but cause ive had a stillbirth and im a lil bit over weight im in a higher risk group so im going for bloods and then a glucose test :-S
i was going to enjoy a nice sunny walk to the doctors but as im typing the sky is turning very dark and gray! bloody british weather!!
the thing on my ticker made me laugh my boobs are defo giving pamela andersons boobies a run for their money! they are hard and sore! mmm sexy!

ill write back after i get back for the midwife! hopefully it goes well, im shitting myself its all nice and real now, i just hope i dont get let down at the scan!

i just got back from the midwifes there was a student who whispered when she talked so it took aaaagggeees. the did all the usual stuff took bloods etc.. i now have a big bruise on my arm :-(
i have some protein in my wee but nothing to worry about right now.
i still haven't taken m 6week belly photo im really tired after walking back from the docs, it really wiped me out i could quite happily have a nap right now!

Connratulations on your pregnancy.

I'm so happy you got your BFP!! :happydance:

Sending you some sticky for your LO. xx

Hellloooooooooo my lovely im on here now with you too :happydance::happydance:

Some company 4 ya :hugs:

woohoo company!! lol

a beautiful birth vid http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ct8MyqhC2c&feature=related
nearly made me cry!

im having an awful day (those who can see girly bit) im so tearful and upset

hormones are playing a big part in this

hormones are a fucking bitch!

fuck hormones

:hugs::hugs::hugs:

taken at 6+2
http://i56.photobucket.com/albums/g169/uvlolly/2008_04130148.jpg

boobies are growing!!

Great photo Molly. Those boobs are coming alone fine xx

That water birth made me cry!! She was very controlled!!! God I hope I'm that calm!!!

x

That water birth made me cry!! She was very controlled!!! God I hope I'm that calm!!!

x

she was 18 at the time didnt she do so well!! i watched another one with a women who gave birth at home in the bath and she made on noise that was it and it was the biggest newborn i have ever seen! wonder women!

today my tiredness has been taken to a whole new level im sitting here fighting to keep my eyes open crazy!

the early scan is getting closer by the second and id be fibbing if i said i wasnt worried.

i think i have a touch of a water infection! :-(

my boobies are gettin larger quick! i dont remember this happening so fast last time, im gunna have to go bra shopping very soon!

x

18!! When I had my first I had just turned 20 and I screamed like a banshee!! The nurses told me I was upsetting the other patients!!

I'm sure everything is gonna be peachy on tuesday. Cant wait to hear all about it.

x

when i was having skye i kicked a midwife in the head and decided that i was going to die when the head crowned!!!

one more sleep untill my early scan, one more sleep untill i know if my pregnancy is viable. its a big day the scan in at 9am and with parking and not being sure of where the EPAU is (last time i went there i was in alot of pain in a wheel chair) we are going to have to leave mega early!

im worried about so many parts of tomorrow, im gunna be late, or theres not going to be anything there and its all in my head, its going to be an empty sac measuring 2 weeks or something.
im fully expecting there not to be a heartbeat, i suppose its my way of getting my self ready for the worst case.... although its not worst case just yet cause sometimes a heart beat isnt seen untill 7 weeks.

gosh my head to doing backfilps today

I think us thinking the worst is a defence mechanism. Then if we are right we can say we knew all along.

I felt incredibly nervous saturday before the scan so I know exactly how you're feeling today.

You're gonna be fine - I have a good feeling.

x

My God! Just watched that water birth - held my breath all the way through - then creid my eyes out at the end it was so beutiful! Have to go to work now though, so need to pull my self together!

yeah it is def a defense mech cause when i had my last m/c we found out at the scan and the first thing i said was oh its not like this hasnt happened before i knew it blah before breaking down in a complete reck!

the girl in the you tube vid is a total trouper, she did bloody well hats off the her completly

interesting- i thought id use my last HPT and OPK being the poas addict that i am, HPT test line was so dark it was the same as the control line, and the OPK test line is the same as the control like on the HPT the control line its quite faint.it looks like the tests upside down
http://i56.photobucket.com/albums/g169/uvlolly/2008_04140161.jpg

blue one HPT green one OPK

cool eh?

I wish u all the best with this little gift from God

x x x

Good luck with your scan chicken , will be checking in tomorrrow to see that all is well :hugs: :hugs:

Hey lovely just wanted to pop in and wish you luck for the scan tomorrow!!

Make sure you let us know how it goes!!

Hey Molly

Will be thinking of you both tomorrow darling.

Loads of snuggles xxx :hugs:

thanks guys im actually having some cramps..... in the last hour or so, ill keep you posted:cry::cry:

Good luck with ur scan tomorrow, let us no how it goes. x

How are you feeling sweetie? Ok i hope

Good luck for your scan tomorrow. One more sleep like you said. I suppose it helps that it will be early so you can put your mind at ease at the beginning of the day. Let us know how it goes will be thinking of you.

Just wanted to wish you good luck hun for the morning xx

thank you everyone, i had a big panic last night i was getting period type cramps in my back and tummy, i was in alot of pain for about two hours then it eased off i had convinced myself i was losing the baby it really really hurt, i didnt get alot of sleep and went to the EPAU this morning, first i got seen by a nurse who too some details and my notes, then i was sick :S then i went in for the scan i was really scared, they did the normal pelvic scan and could see 'definite evidence of pregnancy' but she couldnt see inside the sac, to me it looked empty and there wasnt any sign of a flicker, then she did an internal and there was a clear set of shapes (circles and stuff) and a strong flicker!

this is what it says on the scan report
Gestational sac present
yolk sac present
Embryo present
Crown rump length 6.0mm
heartbeat present
Viable intra uterine pregnancy-6+weeks gestation
no adnexal masses or free fluid seen
left ovary seen - right ovary seen (should i be worried about that??)

im to keep my dating scan things are looking good it was the most beautiful blob ever!

:hugs: So glad your scan went well.

YAY!! So pleased it went ok for you sweetie!! :hugs:

I'm glad everything went well!!! I hope you feel better now.

:happydance::happydance::happydance:

I was so worried for you last night, glad your beautiful blob is doing so well xxx

Yay!!! I know exactly what that feels like!:) Amazing isnt it! I am so glad blob has a heartbeat!

Dont worry about your period pains, they are normal in the first trimester for some woman. I had them so bad the doctors thought i was ectopic, but I was fine.

Now time to stop stressing and start sleeping like you never slept before and chucking up for england!

Congratulations and good luck for the rest of the journey. i am sure you will be fine!

Now i am gonna get my arse out of bed (it is gone 16:00) and go buy myself some comfort food! Fancy something like icecream and maybe a brownie!

yay for comfort food! i wish i could eat properly right now the chucking for england started a while ago the wonderful joys of pregnancy!

ive been mega tired today and i have had heartburn mmm tastey!

i cant get the image on the little heartbeat flickering on the screen out of my head! im starting to bond with this baby inside me and that scares me because what is so freely given can be cruely snatched away and im not sure im strong enough for that again.

YAY!! Mollys bean is growing big and strong!
well done little blob for making your mummy so happy today!!
So pleased for all of you!
xxx

i cant get the image on the little heartbeat flickering on the screen out of my head! im starting to bond with this baby inside me and that scares me because what is so freely given can be cruely snatched away and im not sure im strong enough for that again.

It is the bonding and the love you feel that makes you strong and able to cope with anything - which you can do. Optimism - although hard helps us deal with these things and even helps the baby - as he feels your stress.

You have little reason to be afraid this time, so embrace the little miracle happening inside you. Everything happens for a reason and the babies you have lost are not the same as the baby that needs you now. You will drive yourself insane and have a pregnancy from hell if you don't let the past go.

Hold on to that flicker of hope and it should be a little wriggler in 10 weeks time. Don't be afraid! You have already come so far!:hugs::hugs:

Hello Sweetpea, just sneaking in to see how things are going.

hey neyney! thins are going well:-)

i know i should embrace and enjoy this and i am trying, its getting a little easier each day, especially not i can see my body starting to change its making it real and the scan proved that it wasnt all in my head!

i got a letter through this morning from my doctors, asking me to provide a urine sample because of the results of my booking in bloods. i dont know if i should be worried.. :-S

sickness has been so bad in the last few days i have been rendered useless i cant do anything apart from puke and sleep, its dead sexy!

another thing thats dead sexy my boobs are sore and getting bigger, i have been finding sleeping really uncomfy so i dug out my old sports bra from where i used to go to the gym (ha yes i know funny i did actually used to work out) and slept in that oh my gosh so much better!!

so when you go for the 1st appointment with the midwife i know they'll go all thro ur life history and the OH'S but do they do any actual tests like,

scans
or internal tests? Im no good at them i cry geting my smear done.

x

You sound like you are going through exactly what I did at the beginning - it was because I had seriously high levels of hormones. Hopefully this means good! Bloody horriable though isnt it? My sports bra became my best friend!

so when you go for the 1st appointment with the midwife i know they'll go all thro ur life history and the OH'S but do they do any actual tests like,

scans
or internal tests? Im no good at them i cry geting my smear done.

x

ive already been to the midwife the letter was about a dodgey urine sample in the end, the women on the phone said my lab test wasnt suitable but thi thing is my test didnt go to the lab my midwife gave it back to me to re use the pot

the internal scan wasnt as bad as i thought it would be no where near as bad as a smear i bit uncomfy but ok

You sound like you are going through exactly what I did at the beginning - it was because I had seriously high levels of hormones. Hopefully this means good! Bloody horriable though isnt it? My sports bra became my best friend!


i do seem to have all the same symptoms as last time just 100% worse (last time i was in hospital for sickness etc) this time ive been so ill that my wicked step mum thought it was twins.

i figure as long as im sick the babys still making me hormonal so its a goood sign :happydance:

I dont think Ive said it anywhere else - congrats on your BFP! You sound like you've had an awful time before and I can totally understand why you're so nervous.

Hope you feel better soon *hugs* I have to say, I do NOT miss morning sickness at all.

xxx

I dont think Ive said it anywhere else - congrats on your BFP! You sound like you've had an awful time before and I can totally understand why you're so nervous.

Hope you feel better soon *hugs* I have to say, I do NOT miss morning sickness at all.

xxx

at the moment its morning sickness thats keeping me going cause i know stuffs still happening! :rofl: thank you :-D

does the worrying ever stop

x

hehe my camera came today its pink<3 happy times

I think worrying about bonding with your little bean and the rug being pulled from under you, is more of the old defense mechanism again. You know that life can be and is cruel.
I have a good feeling about this pregnancy for you. xxx

thanks mervsmum, its really hard to throw myself into it because i know just how fast things can be taken away!

im trying to enjoy it as much as i can but it is very very hard.

i dont feel as sick today/this morning i feel a bit wobbley but im ok, i need to tidy up the flat today i went on a making spree to make a nice card for james's mums birthday(sunday) so theres kinda stuff everywhere the cats are using my craft boxes as spring boards!

im waiting in today for next to come pick up their poor excuse for an e cup bra and deliver their probably tiny aa cup bras!

i had to do some covert peeing in a test tube this morning, i must say i seem to be getting quite good at it! im going to the docs today at 540 to find out what the letter about test results was all about.

my cat is prowling around with a toy mouse in his mouth pretending to be a tiger he is very very cute!

hey lollypop - me and tom are ok today thanks! We got home and I went straight to bed to catch up on that sleep i missed last night. Tommy has been thankfully a bit more gentle today and i just treated myself to a chocolate muffin:)

I feel a bit more normal now and am getting anxious about needing to pack to move in just over a week! Where do you start when you are on your own??

How did it go at the docs? Your cats sound adorable. My life would be so empty without my little monster to constantly slap me inthe face when I have been in bed too long!

I take it next isnt the place to buy the larger bra then? I might give that a miss on your recommendation - need to find some nice nursing bras!

dont ever order bras from next ever ever ever! i got some e cup bras that didnt fit so i figured if get some ffcups, they got delivered today and they were awful, the ffcup bras came up tiiiny so im suck with another day in a sports bra!! gaah

my doctors um well it turned out that my midwife let my blood samples go bad before she sent them off, she also wrote my DOB wrong so i have to go in for them again on wednesday great!!

ive moved too many times on my own i just throw stuff in boxes/bags and hope for the best.

thats all im doing right now hoping for the best.

ive been really fed up today i have actually done nothing, im frustrated with myself, im finding it really hard to do anything im either fed up or being ill.
i suppose itll pass at some point.

some people know about my noisy neighbour, he got sectioned, now i have a twat upstairs playing drum and bass so loud it makes my fish tank water jiggle.

what the hell is the matter with people? nobody cares about anyone else these days

What a sucky day you have had!! sorry about your neighbour - are you planning on moving any time soon? You dont need that kinda stress!

Your MW should know better than to let yur blood go off! what are docs and people up to these days?? Why is everyone so uncompetant. When the morning sickness is all over and you have grown a bit, doing nothing all day will become complete bliss! I only ever visit family, shop and sort out stuff. I will be so thankful of it when tom comes! Then i wont get a moment's peace.

When i had morning sickness there were days when i couldnt get out of bed and my mum had to literally drag me out. Wish i could stay in bed all day now - although i did get up at 18:00 today - but i was out all morning!

Just drove out to collect a baby changing unit from a seller on ebay - she was sooo lovely and had the cutest kids. She gave me a sleeping pod from her own business and it was so nice!:) I feel all happy now!

Hope your evening has improved! Do you live on your own or with a oh?

i live with my oh james, he is at work all day, im signed off of work due to depression- after skye died i went a bit looupy-

we are trying to move, to rent around here is so expensive i have to hope with moving via the council so im trying to get on housing association lists its very tricky you have to fit in to a certain category.
the only people that are being moved are those fleeing violence, there just isnt any housing anymore.

there is a bungalow of sale in a nicer part of milton keynes near ohs mums we might poke out heads in and see if its at all poss that we could try get on the property ladder

well we can dream

im like a round peg in a square hole!

so we are both bored and not working!

I know how you feel about housing! Down here it is ridiculous. i sold my first house when last year and am back to paying £9,000 a year in rent! You should get something from the council with baby on the way tho - but you will have to really kick up a fuss about yur noisy neighbour or they will just leave you where you are. stupid council!

What happened with skye do you mind me asking?

ive exhausted my options with the council, i have more chance of growning another leg than gettin rehoused via them.

Skyela died at 29weeks, i had a hard pregnancy lots of problems suspected S.b i went for a growth scan and her heart had just stopped i had to give birth three days later.

that is so heart breaking :hugs:

do they know much about the SB? Was it a bad and what caused her heart to stop?

I am sure you will be fine this time:hugs:

Let me say once again, Congratulations on your BFP! I can't imagine how hard it would have been to lose two babies and can certainly understand how nervous you may be for this baby. I believe everything will be ok!

Wishing you a healthy and happy pregnancy! :hug:

I would like to make a point that you must be a very very very strong individual. I hold you in the highest respect, losing two wonderful babies and being able to go through it all again with a heart filled with love amazes me. You are deeply envied and I hope you remember that. Good luck with the pregnancy, and congratulations on your BFP.:hugs::hugs::hugs:

that is so heart breaking :hugs:

do they know much about the SB? Was it a bad and what caused her heart to stop?

I am sure you will be fine this time:hugs:


i didnt want to panic you hun i hope that i haven't, it wasnt my intention. i had a really tough pregnancy i spent most of my time in hospital for extreme sickness. i had my triple test done at 15weeks, the downs came back fine the S.b/ Alpha fetal protein came back t 7.5 which as you prob know is quite high. i went for a scan at 17weeks and her spine looked completely fused but it looked like she had fluid on the brain, and she had really really long legs and what appeared to be twisted feet almost. i had a bleed at 19weeks had a scan, fluid on the brain had seemed to sorted itself out. i was told that everything was fine but to keep my growth scan anyways, had my 28 week growth scan her head was too low too see and there was shadowing on the brain so i came back 2 days later to be scanned by a consultant and she was dead, the shadowing on her brain looked like it might have been a bleed. i was induced and gave birth dead on 29weeks three days after the last scan to the most perfect beautiful baby girl.

i refused an autopsy cause at the time i wasnt strong enough to deal with the thought of her being cut up so i got no definite cause of death and it was stated on the death certificate as suspected abnormal cranial anatomy.

ow thank you leeanne and mBLACK,but im not a strong person though very far from it i survived an horrific year but that doesn't make me strong that makes me a surviver. its human nature to take what life throws at us and get on with it.

im feeling sick and tired today and its only 915am too ill te eat but im sure toast will make me feel better :-S im in limbo!!

You haven't scared me. i was just wondering whether SB might have been to blame - as the higher the spinal defect, the more likely it is to effect organs. A friend of mine had a baby with it on her neck and the doctor said she wouldnt live, so she delivered early and she did die too.

I can't imagine what you must have gone through. You are an incredibly strong person like the girls above said and you are being very brave. But your braveness will be rewarded and i think you are going to have the most beautiful baby girl! Don't know why that is!

If you ever fancy a chat or something cus you are down or bored let me know - you can msn me or something!

ow thanks hun, your the first to guess the sex!

im so ill today i have pretty much slept all morning i feel sea sick its not fun!

today im sick headachey and tired although im sure i have seriously over slept in the last few days which is proberly why i have a headache bleh!

Aww darlin :hug: I hope you feel better soon

Sorry you're not feeling too hot missy. Have youu got anything good planned for the weekend??
x

ive got some beautiful flowers and a giant tea cup (see photo bit) to take over to mils for her 61st birthday but thats about it,i feel really rough! i have sent james out to buy me some juicy fruit cause im really thirsty again and need to eat but i dont fancy anything thats in the house.

im slightly horrified today, i was commenting that my belly was getting a bit more podgey as you do and realised that my entire belly its covered with a fine web of black hair!! theres loads of it, i have had a 'snail trail' line before with my daughter but this is crazy.

it makes me think im having a boy even more.

im hopin this sickness passes soon!

Aww hun :hugs:

Thats the trouble when your dark haired!! It was prob so fine before that you didnt notice it!!

When is MIL's birthday today?

my hairs actually quite light naturally, its like mousey brown this was properly black, oh well its stuck in a mass of sticky paper in the bin along with my eyebrow hair now :-D

waxings addictive, i wanted to keep going, i even stuck a strip on my ohs arm...he wasnt so impressed but now her has a smooth patch!

her birthdays today but we took the flowers over yesterday cause my cats kept trying to eat them! i got tired and sicky so came home james is still there now.

i got pissed of with his sister, shes a silly cow ill expalin another time though im way tired!

his mum had a lovely day though:-D

waxings addictive, i wanted to keep going, i even stuck a strip on my ohs arm...he wasnt so impressed but now her has a smooth patch!


Oooooooo yes!! And there is something much more satisfying about waxing a man :rofl:

right im less tired but just as sick now! mesh!!

his sister is a twat she is a horrid selfish person, she borrowed a chunk of his mum pension for her wedding a year ago under the understanding that she would pay her back a bit each month, they gave her 500£ then took it back!
in over a year.. now shes talking about moving to oz in 18months time! so it looks like she will never get her money back.
selfish huh.

im sure my sickness is getting worse nothing is working, im trying my best to keep nibbling on things like crackers and fruit -anything i fancy lol- but i feel hot and sick cold and sick headachey nauseas vomiting shaky over and over again.
ive even started waking up in the night crippled by nausea.

grim!

im going to get some more wax and attack my legs, its so much quicker than shaving.
i went to have my legs waxed in a salon once and i cried leaving with only half a leg done.
im climbing back on that horse!

james is having a job interview this morning, being a trainnee at something in i.t that has better progression than where he is now. this morning he got up late couldnt find his black trousers(even though i asked him if he was sorted and he said yes before we went to bed men eh) and paniced a bit so i hope it hasnt dented his confidence because he really want to work with said company.

you are havin a bit of a rollercoaster ride arent you bab?!!!!

i dont know why but im gonna say i think your gonna be joining team blue!!

your scan is on my bday aswell so thats such a good sign lol roll on may 21st!!

brill journal and i hope you feel better soon

h x

Hi Ya,

Glad that you are both doing well,

ive been getting bad morn sickness tried eating more n small portins, dry food like crackers, dip sticks, accupunture wrist bands, ginger nuts, peppermint tea everything.....atleast u no ur working ok

x x x

im already convinced im joining team blue, i knew as soon as i got a positive test with my first that i was having a girl and its the same this time im sure its a boy! i dont really want to find out the sex though so im gunna have a shock if it turns out to be a girl!

i know a few people whos birthdays are on the 21st of may im guessin its a good day!

im literally living on crackers and fruit i feel awful but like ladygibrill said at least i know im working, ive been told being paralyzed with sickness is a sign of a healthy pregnancy!

i remember all this last time i remember sitting in the scan room looking at all these happy pregnant people thinking how the hell are they smiling this is hell! sat shaking in the corner clutching a bottle of water lol

hopefully it passes if not ill have some good horror storys to tell the baby when its older!

So you think your going to be team blue eh?

Ive got this weird gut feeling im going to be pink. Everyone else seem to think that too!!

Weird how we get thos feelings eh?

womens intuition eh!

me and james drove around for nearly an hour searching for a burger van cause i was craving a burger van burger! i was so sick and i wanted it so much, we finally found a greasy spoon cafe and i had a beef burger with egg and bacon before i was half finished i felt loads better!

grim grim greasy food!

hmmmmmmmmmmm......... grease............I want grease..........

*hands emma some grease*

Hey uv,

glad your feeling well....I dont think i can go in a cafe all food makes me feel sick i can eat it just cant look at it or smell it....

when im eating is the only time i dont feel sick well at the mo shrimp is loving prawn crisp, wine gums n curry sauce with chips.....

I keep refering to the shrimp as a boy....
my oh thinks its a gal n he says his neva wrong..

im inpatient ill want to know the sex but oh wont so ill have to keep it stum n leave stuff i buy at my nans...

Do any of u get these horrible pains down ur legs?
x

no i dont i have been getting stretching 'pains' across my tummy but i am actually getting a podge on now!

this morning i was waking up all snug as a bug in a rug bed- i didnt feel sick i thought well this is novel then i opened my eyes and it went wrong DOH!

my next door neighbors need therapy!! they have been screaming and shouting at each other since yesterday door slaming the lot. oh the joys of living in a block of flats!

i have finally got my therapy through! ive been waiting 13months! i have been offered 6 initial sessions that should be helpfull in some shape or form, its a big shame that its had to take this long i have been close to breaking point a few times with no support, and now im on an even keel well its typical huh

there isnt anything pregnancy wise to report really i feel vile my hairs starting to do that pregnant thing. all i do is be sick eat cry and sleep!

oh my other neighbor -the music man- i have to go meet with the councils legal team because they have drawn up a statement for me, although all the diary sheets etc that i have filled out i still have and i havent signed anything so surely they are not aloud to act on my behalf without some kind of consent from me.

womens intuition eh!

me and james drove around for nearly an hour searching for a burger van cause i was craving a burger van burger! i was so sick and i wanted it so much, we finally found a greasy spoon cafe and i had a beef burger with egg and bacon before i was half finished i felt loads better!

grim grim greasy food!

Oh god the best ones for those big dirty greasy burgers are the ones on the market ... i always end up grabbing one from there cutting through to get back to the car.

I keep getting odd cravings for cheeseburgers too!!

james got his decree absolute! wwwwwwweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

I just wanted to say congrats to you on your :bfp: Sending tons of sticky dust to you.:hug:

oow thank you :-)

:hissy::hissy::hissy::hissy::hissy:

james's contract has been ended with no notice!

BOLLOX

:hissy:

Oh crap!! When will he find out about the other job??

x

Ps - I posted the book x

thanks hun!

he had an interview yesterday cause he wasnt happy there anyway i just hope to god that he gets it!

this morning his divorce was final so i thought YES we can hurry up and get married so when the baby comes we all have the same name....now he has no job booo

things work themselfs out, positive mental attitude!

im picking up my doppler tonight!

PMA is what its all about my dear!!!

:happydance: for the doppler!!!!

x

loads of PMA i give up being sad about stuff its just gets pointless after a while!

im officially in maturity clothes mainly due to sudden bloat! all of my trousers dig in and yesterday i couldnt do my top buttons up. so im not in my old faithfull up to the belly button ten tons of elastic mega comfy trousers!

yay

i got lend a doppler yesterday!

i though its way to early to hear anything but theres no harm in just seeing how it works....

i got my heartbeat (i also fart arsed around with it listening to my belly gurgles-just sounded like static) at between 80-90bpm then i got a wooshy sound between 120+180 every now and again... it didnt sound quite like it does when you got to the midwife but could that have been the baby? i didint want to get excited for no reason. what ever it was it sounded nice :-D

the instructions say 120+ is the baby but they also say you wont hear anything until past 8 weeks.

hurrrm i wonder!

i forgot to take my weekly bump pic this week due to all the drama of puking my guts up daily and james losing his job which is a shame cause theres something going on even though its bloat its still different.

mmm mango fruit salad for brekie

Ooo mango...i cant get enough of pinapple at the moment!

What type of doppler have you borrowed? I really want to get one although my OH thinks ill become obsessed with it (what moi?!?! as if ;))

its a hibebe BT200

:-D

ive given in and ordered one off ebay. I can always sell it afterwards (its £62 with delivery!!)

not bad :-) i burrowed mine i figured it was easier me and my friends have like a prego pack of bits and bobs we pass around to each other when pregnant and the doppler has worked its way in hurrah

Aww thats so cool, ive been eyeing up a couple of dopplers on ebay

Thats a good idea having stuff to pass around between you, i would do it but none of my friends around here intend on being pg in the near future lol

i just had my blood tests redone that the student midwife messed up she took loads!! im sure she didnt take that much the first time round, she was really good, im normal crap to get blood out of but she managed it pretty well!

been fighting with james all morning, i couldnt wake him up to take me to the doctors he realized i was going by myself (this was at like 1130 not early) flipped out started going on about how its his baby too why is he being left out etc etc im like er i tried to wake you up, then i got why you having a go at me blah blah i wasnt having a go i was going to leave you in bed so you could sleep....
fecking men i dont understand.

after that i had to go pick some new lenses up he decided to come and get me as soon as i got in the car he started rasing his voice so i got out and walked.

someone got out of the wrong side of the bed this morning.

Wow, you were able to hold your tongue!? I never would have been able to stop myself from bitching back even worse, kudos to you my dear!:D

i just ignored him theres no point in bitching back it dont get me anywhere.

x

on a good note he got the other job he interviewed for

Well that's good at least you'll have the financial security - when you take leave for depression at work do you get paid ?

generally i think, i have been unable to work for a year cause i get too ill, there are benefits people can claim in the uk but i dont know much about them :S

Are you not claiming them?? You should do! the extra cash will come in handy! Plus at 28 weeks you can get stat maternity pay too, which is £112 per week.

i just had my blood tests redone that the student midwife messed up she took loads!! im sure she didnt take that much the first time round, she was really good, im normal crap to get blood out of but she managed it pretty well!

been fighting with james all morning, i couldnt wake him up to take me to the doctors he realized i was going by myself (this was at like 1130 not early) flipped out started going on about how its his baby too why is he being left out etc etc im like er i tried to wake you up, then i got why you having a go at me blah blah i wasnt having a go i was going to leave you in bed so you could sleep....
fecking men i dont understand.

after that i had to go pick some new lenses up he decided to come and get me as soon as i got in the car he started rasing his voice so i got out and walked.

someone got out of the wrong side of the bed this morning.

Aww, sorry you had a bad day with OH! He sounds a bit stressed today but perhaps his outlook will change due to his new job....which is great btw!

:hug:

i dont think i can claim anything because james is living here.

he has gone to sign all the paper work for his job today yay!!

im trying out these other contact lenses and i dont think im gettin on with them i think im going to have to be contact lense free for the rest of my pregnancy boo!!! hiss!

not happy about that at all i hate wearin my specs they make me look like a geek and not in a good way

UV,
I amg going to claim the 112 per wek from 28/29 weeks it SMP (statutory maternity pay) paid by the government if you do not qualify for maternity pay by anyother source ie. employer. Everyone is entitled to it!
Becuase of my redundancy I was advised by citizens advice to claim dole :blush: this is so I continue to pay national insurance then at 28 weeks I start to claim SMP if I have not found a job by then and am not entitled to MP from them. if you were a single person or a low income family it wouldn't be SMP it would be Income Support. Wow I've learnt all this is last month not sure it is 100% correct.
can anyone else shed any light?
xx
xx

YOu may be entitled to incapacity benefit as I dont think that is means tested so you OH income wouldnt matter. YOu may also be entitled to maternity allowance all depending on when the last time you worked was. Definatley worth looking into. :)

Hun there is loads you can claim!!

Try and get james working tax credits too, plus your SMP

Then you can be rich, pass your driving test and we can take the babies out for lunch lol.

lol i just thought cause james was living here i couldnt claim anything:dohh:

ill look into it!

i really do need to pass my driving test im seriously thinking about it now, i need to get my head around the theory and hazard perception!

its annoying cause all i get from james is oh i didnt have to do that, i didnt have to do that either i got him to help me practice my theory but he was crap cause all the rules have changed since he did his!

:muaha:

It isnt means tested, so you should be ok ! But you cant get it until you are 28 weeks. But you should still be able to claim low income benefits until then.

Dates and numbers:
There are 224 days until your due date on December 05, 2008.
You are 56 days pregnant.
You are 1.8 months pregnant.
You are in your 2nd month of pregnancy.
Your 1st trimester: February 29, 2008 to May 29, 2008. (0 - 12 weeks)
Your 2nd trimester: May 30, 2008 to September 11, 2008. (13 - 27 weeks)
Your 3rd trimester: September 12, 2008 to December 05, 2008. (28 - 40 weeks)



how cool is that!

Awww lol! Funky!

im so ill its ridiculous! crackers, ginger, lemons etc have all been thrown out of the proverbial window today! i was panicing because i felt ok after a while all of a sudden this morning then we went to get a diff cot cause the lovely american one is just way too big and they car journey ruined it ive felt vile ever since i have had a nap and woke up in tears cause i still felt bad.
james daughter is here this weekend.

its not good!

Awww hun i hope you feel a little better soon :hugs:

Just looking at your dates and numbers i didnt realise you are on 9 days ahead of me!! How cool is that!!

Just been catching up with your journal.

Hope you feel better soon. :hug:
x

hey hun, just catching up on what's been happening with you. You've still got the noisy neighbours - nightmare. The girl's are right, look into what you are entitled to. I know there's stigma attached to certain benefits etc, but you are not looking for more than you are legally entitled to and it's right that you and others like you with genuine difficulties don't miss out when the drug addicts and lowlife's of this world get it handed on the proverbial plate (ps, I know some drug addicts are genuinely ill as well, hence why drug addicts and low-life's are split out!)

You say you are getting some kind of treatment now - I take it that's to help you overcome your grief? I hope it helps hun. I've a friend who had serious mental health issues after childhood abuse and the state of mental health care in this country drives me mad. Even the label 'mental health' conjures up images of phsycopaths and its not lol, its just some people need help coming to terms with what's been thrown at them.

God, I'm sorry I've had a rant in your journal and that wasn't my intention. I really hope you are doing well, that the sickness is a fantastic sign and means that everything is going great for you and your bean. I hope you and James are speaking again - it's no fun arguing xx

ive stopped feelin sick over the last few days.... i feel fine this morning, im going to call my doctor and get a referral to the epau for a scan cause the sudden non sickness is bothering me.

hi nic i agree mental health has a horrid stigma attached to it, im not a sociopath or anything like that if anything im a depressive who has panic atttacks so not that scary really. i prefer the quieter life id rather sample the fine weather we are having today from my bedroom window. im aware its a waste but right now its the only time i feel safe so im sticking with it.
me and james are ok now.

yesterday i got in such a state i just sat and cried cause i didnt know what else to do i felt so fed up and worried about not feeling as sick...today it seems like i dont feel ill at all its rubbish.

belh!!!

ta ta for now

Try not to worry Poppet. Mine stopped for days at about the same point you're at then came back with a vengence.

x

im tryin not to worry but its hard.... ill see what happens when we go out in the car later that normally makes me decorate a tesco bag!

:hugs: How did it go did you end up filling the bad hun lol?

Try not to worry though hun

we took amy back today, she cried. we havnt seen her mum for ages (its always her boyfriend) and she looks very pregnant! ha nothing has been said as of yet thought.

we went for dinner around my step mummys. i couldnt eat i was full after about 3 folk fulls.

i still feel ok, im really down though.

im too tired to have convos with people but im too awake to sleep if that makes sence.

ill ring epau in the morning

spotting:cry:

:hugs: What kind of spotting?

:hugs: How u doing today?
Thinking of u and LO. x

bright red+pink not alot but enough to panic me, no pains though it seemed to stop late last night and there hasnt been anything since...i feel nauseas (slightly) trying to get through to doctors figured theres no point in going to a+e
stress

hope you're okay xxxxx

waiting for doc to call me back with referal to epau

Oh hun you must let us know how it goes, im really worried about you :cry::hugs:

I hope you & your LO are ok :hugs:

my doc has referred me to the epau i have to wait until the 7th of MAY! for a scan to see if everything is ok! if i start passing clots and get a temp i have to got to a/e what kind of advice is that i just have to sit and wait for over a week.

for god sake

if i were you i'd ring the epau, express your concern and worries and explain your history and ask if there is any possible way they can see you any earlier. Say the doc has booked you in but you feel the wait is causing your more anxiety!
i really hope everything is ok and as PP said do let you us know how u are and keep talking xxxxxxxx

i have spoken to them already thats the soonest they can get me in, theyll call me if they get any cancellations but its still a long wait. bloody ridiculous.

it seems like other people that are having the same problem are getting seen right away its not fair.

So sorry that you are having to wait for so long for your scan, I am sending more sticky dust for your little bean. and lots of :hug:, you and your little one are in my prayers. Take care.
:hug:

everything seems to have stopped now which is so good. im warn out right now the 7th s such a long way away

OMG i cant believe they are making you wait over a week. If it gets worse hun you MUST go to A&E.

In the meantime try and relax, it sounds good that its easing off :hugs:

Hope everything is ok. Cant believe they are making you wait that long, thats awful. :hugs:

it all seems ok now. i still dont feel ill although i was slightly nauseas this morning absolutely no more blood just normal white/clear discharge. iv been laying down all day. ive been in shock i havnt known quite what to do with myself ive found it hard to talk to james im so scared of losing another baby and waiting a week for a scan just seems so stupid. i know mk hosp it really underfunded- they even closed the gyne ward its now shared with sau. but that doesn't really help me right now.
im just holding on the fact the bleedings stopped.

on a better note i have my wedding dress! it lifted my mood a bit we are getting there with the wedding before the babys born. nothing fancy just family and a party after.

god what a rubbish day and a half

im thinking of u

:hug:

hope you feel better soon Molly. I know I dont have your history but my midwife wouldnt refer me at all when I was spotting. We ended up having to pay for a private scan (was £50.00). I know your not working but if you are really worried maybe look into getting a private one done? Anything to settle your piece of mind??

the only clinics near me only scan after 10 weeks... the one in m.k is really really expensive.

i woke up this morning and i dont even feel pregnant any more at all nothing.

i dont know what to do

i did another preg test this morning and this is the result
http://i56.photobucket.com/albums/g169/uvlolly/2008_04290177.jpg
http://i56.photobucket.com/albums/g169/uvlolly/2008_04290357.jpg

does this mean im ok and still making hormones to get a pos test?

im so worried. but im back to the fact theres nothing i can to either way. just waiting.

a private scan here is 95£ ive been looking on the net, james dont get paid untill thursday but i may get callled into the epau before then... fingers croseed

Its so easy to talk yourself out of symptoms when you are worried, plus most of them come and go. Ihad really bad sickness for about 4 days then a little nausea then nothing. I dont 'feel' pregnant (other than my mood swings and very short fuse!) but im confident I still am and am confident for you too!

I know it must be hard especially with having suffered a missed miscarriage but they are so rare the chances of you having two are so so slim. Try to keep your chin up babe, PMA! What will be will be and as hard as it is, there is no point driving yourself mad over the next few days worrying. Maybe try to get out for a bit today see if the fresh air helps?

Really hope you get the answers you need soon xxx

Hun, I remember being about 8 or 9 weeks and posting a topic on here (I even rang NHS direct) because I didn't feel pregnant anymore. It sounds ridiculous but I was scared beyond belief.

However three days later.... back to morning sickness, tiredness, sore boobs etc. I think it's just when the sickness and that sort of thing starts to wear off you go for like a day or two with nothing and then a day with everything and so on.... Im sure everything is fine! I cant believe theyre making you wait for a scan. They made me wait 2 days which I thought was horrendous.

Im sure all will be ok *hugs* keep us updated.

xxx

Passing by to say :hi: I hope everything is going well with your little bean I'm sure little bean is fine:hugs: If only those docs could get you in sooner it would be much better cause being worried about something being wrong is not a good feeling at all. sticky dust to you :dust: :dust: :dust:

my doc was doing a home visit in my building today so she popped in just to reasure me that things still might be ok and to rest. theres been no more bleeding so its a great sign

Glad its looking good hun!! Has the doc put your mind at ease a little?

Sorry i disappeared last night i over ran the bath and lets just say i got lost in the bubbles lol

its ok i got really tired and fell asleep!

just had major crap with pets at home vets who offered me a cat abortion cause they didnt spay my cat properly! stress! im ment to be resting not pacing up and down chasing idiots who cant do their job properly

So sorry you are having a rough time honey, hope things are ok and that you get that scan soon! xxx

Thats really crap you've got to wait a week for a scan, they only take a few minutes. When i had the same problem i managed to get a scan the next day. I thought that was the point of having EPAU units to get women assessed as quick as poss.

yeah i thought that was the point too but i guess we are wrong... itsone of those things over worked and underfunded!

When i went to the EPAU at my hosi,they were doing abortions in the next room. You know the ones where they have to take a tablet, and then wait. I Know they have to do it somewhere, but it was really inappropriate.

Hope everything turns out okay for you anyway, surely you must be due some good luck. Keeping my fingers crossed for you.

hey Molly - sorry you've had a rough few days. :hugs:

Glad things are settling down now.

Fingers crossed all is still fine.

x

all i have done over the last few days is sleep, im wishing away the days until the7th. no more bleeding/pain yesterday eve or today though.

im sort of at a loss at the moment.

as soon as i start getting in to the idea of being pregnant things start to change. im really unmotivated i need to pull myself together and wash my hair.

heres to another day!

When i went to the EPAU at my hosi,they were doing abortions in the next room. You know the ones where they have to take a tablet, and then wait. I Know they have to do it somewhere, but it was really inappropriate.

Hope everything turns out okay for you anyway, surely you must be due some good luck. Keeping my fingers crossed for you.

thats awful, when i was bleeding at 19weeks i was stuck in a ward full of people waiting to have surgery that was hard.

the nhs do a fabulous job overall though the staff do have to take some shit

i feel better today, i did a preg test the other day and one this morning and this mornings lines were darker, i also made scrambled eggs and felt sick as soon as i started to eat them, ive had headaches and mild sickness maybe things are going to be ok...

The days always drag when you want them to fly!!!
:hugs: for the bad days, i'm sure it'll be ok. x

Bleh! Eggs are truly a pregnant womans worst enemy, :hugs: for you today!

Hi Bunny,

sorry ive been missing in action.. i just found this place- yep, im still the ditzy Phoebe-type person..LOL!! (only found out when complained to akamummy how its crap there's nowhere to keep in contact with you guys, lol)

Anyway, so.. Ive just finished reading your journal so far..man, are you having an up and down time about it all.. I can only imagine pregnancy wise, what you're going through- but i also suspect its prefectly normal (i know ill be a total wreck come my time..)

i do wholeheartedly believe you will be fine, though!!! And im quite chuffed you think its a boy too..as i said umpteen days ago, lol!!

Take care, bunny and believe and trust it will all work out in the end!!

BIG :hug: Omi xxx

ps, i never had nausea last time and im praying for me to have it next time..as you said, at least you know things are going the right way if you feel it- having said that..quite possibly one of the worst things to feel in the entire world,though..ugh xxx

Hi ya hun, I haven't been online in ages and I have missed out on sooooooo much. I can see you have been having a hard time lately. I'm glad you are feeling a little better. I pray that everything will be ok with your bean. Take care:hugs::hugs::hugs:

Hey miss molly :wave:
you poor thing, Im sorry you are feeling sickly! :sick:
I havent had any morning sickness as YET!! and I stress YET!!!!!! No doubt I will start feeling blegh :p from next week onwards!
As for eggs...:sick:...when I was pregy with my 1st (who is now 2)...I couldnt stand eggs! THE SMELL!!! :sick: So I completely understand! :hug: I was bed ridden with him I was throwing up the WHOLE DAY!!! I couldnt even get out of bed! I had to quit work when I was 6 weeks pregy! So yup I completely understand about feeling gross! :lol:
Anyway, enough about me...hang in there sweet pea...Im looking foward to hearing about your scan!!! EXCITING!!!!!! :happydance:
:hug: :hug: :hug:

Hey hun how are you feeling today?

Hey sweetie.

I'm glad you feel a little more positive.

You probably need to stop testing now as your HCG levels will plateau anytime now and then start to drop. Dont want you getting stressed by faint lines.

:hug:

Hey uv,

I really hope that you have the happy ending you deserve....

Ill be praying for ya

x x x

thank you everyone, i called the epau this morning and a lady theres double stared my name, shes talking to the epau sister and is trying to get me in tomorrow. its got to the point now where i just need to know i cant get excited about the rest of my pregnancy untill i know for sure whats happened/whats going on.
i have pretty much lost all signs of pregnancy, i feel a bit off but that could be down to stress...

i will stop testing

and ill keep you posted

Have just caught up with your journal. Lots of :hug: Hope they take you in tomorrow for a scan.

You look after yourself lovely and I will be thinking of you at your scan.

:hug:

thanks girls

its my first therapy session today, i have waited 13 odd months for it i really dont want to go james is off work so he is making me! im not sure what to expect really but i guess ill be able to report back later on.

its a beautiful day today i just wish i could enjoy it more.

I am sure you will come out of your sesh feeling good! You'd be suprised what these people can do!

Good luck and come online and tell me all about it later! I'll try not to moan too much!

your moaning fine hun.

therapy! i didnt like it i felt uncomfy didnt like the man i went to see he was very pushy. he thinks i have post traumatic stress disorder.

i wont be seeing him again im going to wait untill a female is able to see me.

Hello, Sorry the Doc guy didn't work out for you. Hope it goes your way next time:hug:

Hi ya hun, I'm sorry therapy never worked out for you today. If you feel more comfortable talking with a woman then go for it. As you said you have been waiting long enough so I'm sure you want to get something out of it when you go rather than coming home peeved. I hope a lady comes available soon. Take care. Good luck for getting a scan in.:hug:

Aww hun im sorry it didnt work out but there was no point in carrying on if it made you feel uncomfy

thanks everyone, im pretty sure this is a good thing i had curry tonight and i now feel ill! either bad curry or im still pregnant!

epau number cause i keep losing it 243164-

on hold as i type waiting to find out if they can squeese me in, still feeling ill after curry:S not so good!

i need to be at the hosp by 1030! yay ill know by lunch time whats going on! they said i may need to wait around a bit but it should be ok. will report back later

good luck will be thinking of you! :)

I echo these sentiments! Hang in there sweet pea!
:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

Oh yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :hugs: I am so pleased you get to put your mind at rest and I am crossing everything for you!!!!!!!!!!!

I hope it all goes well hunni, we are waiting for you to come back!!

i just got back i was there for hours! the scan was fine and i cried like a baby it looks like a kidney bean. ill post a photo later. thanks guys :-)

:happydance:thats fantastic news hun cant wait to see apic of your little bean.:happydance:

sooooooooo happy for u, u can chill for the wkd now

x x x x

Hey chick glad to hear that everything is well :hug:

Glad it went ok cant wait to see pic!!

That's great news!!! I'm glad for you. Can't wait to see the pics.:hug:

YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :HUGS: I am soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo pleased for you!!!! post the pic!!

Fantastic news! Glad you and LO are ok! Cant wait to see the pics xx

http://i56.photobucket.com/albums/g169/uvlolly/2008_05020182.jpg
http://i56.photobucket.com/albums/g169/uvlolly/2008_05020183.jpg
http://i56.photobucket.com/albums/g169/uvlolly/2008_05020185.jpg

i dont have a scanner to they are photos of photos im afraid but theres a heart beat and thats all that counts to me!

So pleased to hear everything is ok.

Aaww, im so happy for you Molly, i really, really am. I can only imagine how relieved and happy you are!!

The bean looks lovely...im ever so little bit envious but only in a loving and supportive way, of course, lol!! My time will come!!! :)

Im glad to hear you're keeping your feet up-let that lovely oh of yours pamper you silly. I demand foot-rubs and round-the-clock meal delivery service on your behalf!! whatever you want, chicken, its yours, I say!

Takw care bunny :hug:xxx

Aaww, im so happy for you Molly, i really, really am. I can only imagine how relieved and happy you are!!

The bean looks lovely...im ever so little bit envious but only in a loving and supportive way, of course, lol!! My time will come!!! :)

Im glad to hear you're keeping your feet up-let that lovely oh of yours pamper you silly. I demand foot-rubs and round-the-clock meal delivery service on your behalf!! whatever you want, chicken, its yours, I say!

Takw care bunny :hug:xxx

thanks hun, i hope your time comes soon i miss you!!!!!

Great news Molly :hug:

I know I said this already - but so happy for you!!! Great news and pics!! :hugs:

my scan report this time

crl-17mm
FH seen
left ovary appears normal
right ovary seen (im starting to think ive not had one)
no adnexal cysts r masses
no free fluid

:-D

yay fantastic news!! :happydance:

I'm so glad everything is ok! I love the pic of your little bean :happydance:

So everything is just fine.

No more testing or I'll be round to crack your bum.....

TRY to start to enjoy things now poppet - you so deserve this happiness.

:hug:

:hug: I love the photos of your little peanut! SOOO CUTE!!!!! Im jelous! By the way how do you add the photos to your thread? Oh wait my computer is stuffed, so it wont let me do it! Bugger!
Im going for a scan next week, just to make sure every thing is ok! So cute hope mine looks like yours! A heart beat going full speed ahead! :happydance:

Now you know all is well i hope you can chill and have a lovely bank holiday weekend hun

I hope you have a lovely relaxing weekend too hun xx

no def no more testing!! or maybe i shall a crack on the bum sounds like it could be fun..... lol im just joking.

thank you everyone for your well wishes they mean alot alot!

ive come to the conclusion that maybe i cant carry girls?! both last times i was really really ill first one was def a girl second could well have been both times the babys died. this time im convinced its a boy im no where near as sick as i was to start with nor as i was in other pregnancy's.

its certainly food for thought.

x

yay!!! Go boys! :):):)

I will come round and clout you next time you stress:)

hehe ok ill be good!

Oh wow, just caught up after being at work.
So glad you and LO are fine. Definitely agree with others on the relaxation! Time to be pampered!!! x

Molly, you are wonderfully brave and I just wanted to give you some big :hug:
and say that I am so glad everything is alright.

:hugs:

:wohoo: boys are the best! Oh and speaking of being sick and not being sick...When I was pregy with my DS, I was soo vilently ill it wasnt funny! This time round, so far I havent been sick at all! YET!! Might I stress YET!!! :lol:
Hope things are going ok for you sweety...hang in there! :kiss: :hugs:

thank you everyone, i was slightly sick then about6 weeks violently ill and now im ok i feel a bit funny some times but thats it.

my boobies feel very heavy today:(

not alot to report

hey everyone i have flu boo :-( sad. my oh went and got a paper for me to read in bed im flicking through and my 5 year old step daughters teacher has been outed in the news of the world as a dominatrix!! i nearly choked on my tea, im not sure weather to laugh or complain... what do you do in this situation??!:rofl::rofl:

thats funny but bad .... :rofl:

tbh its the womans personal life, she's prob been like it for years and it hasnt affected her job up until now. Imagine all the funny looks she's going to get in the playground. I suddenly vision lots more dads taking their kiddies to school:rofl:

the sad thing is she will prob lose her job, i put a link in general chatter if you wanna see the story

Oh no!! To be honest I do think people's personal life if their personal life, I certainly wouldn't want my colleagues to know some of the things I get up to... not sure if I'd feel differently if it was my step-daughter though!

She'll lose her job. They will say that she's lost all credibility and wont be able to be taken seriously by colleagues and parents. If it was something a bit lower profile, the local authority would probably move her so another school. If she's been paid there may well be an illegal element to it - not low profile!!

Just popped in to say hello, see how you are doing.. I'm going to put a bet that your little one is TEAM BLUE! We need more members so I'm recruiting.:D Fingers crossed your week goes good,:hugs: for today + tomorrow + the week . :)

:rofl: That is soooo funny! I could just imagine you doing that Molly! hehehe (I have a great imagination!)
Poor woman! Was she a nice teacher? because maybe you could put in a good word for her??? I feel sorry for her! :hug: But again, if it was jayden in that situation...I dont know what I would do! So sorry chicken Im not much use Im afraid!
FUNNY STORY THOUGH! :lol:

Just popped in to say hello, see how you are doing.. I'm going to put a bet that your little one is TEAM BLUE! We need more members so I'm recruiting.:D Fingers crossed your week goes good,:hugs: for today + tomorrow + the week . :)

I think your going to be blue this time hunni, dont know why just have a lil feeling ....

Hope your having a nice lazy day today!!

You're team blue for sure, missy!!

Soory to hear about the flu, but GREAT news you're feeling better pg wise, though..

Have a lovely, lovely May Holiday and thanks so much for posting in my journal- I LURVE hearing from you preggie ladies!!

:hug: and lots of love, Naomi xxx

ps. the teacher story...oh, dear..LOL!!

yeah i thought shed lose her job cause it gives the school a bad name.

why could you imagine me doing something like that?!:rofl:

im a good girl!

good every time:muaha:

i feel rougher than a high grade of sand paper been sick so much my throat is sore i think its due to fluyness rather than pg. been in bed for 2 days with hot flushes and bad headaches. :cry: i hope this passes soon i cant help but wonder if itll effect the baby..:baby:

i think im on team blue too im thinking about opening a book seeing as im not going to find out the sex, what do you think??


riiight im going to crawl back under the duvet now byee:hug:

Sorry to hearyou're not feeling to great hun, take it easy and hope you feel much better soon, LO will be fine so just concerntrate on getting yourself better xx

:hug: Wow, everyone is catching this flu! I hope you feel better soon. xxx

Hope your feeling better soon. :hugs:

I feel sorry for that school teacher! What she does in her private life is no one's business! Especially when it is between her and her partner. maybe a bit different if she is doing a public service...

I said right from the moment you sprouted extra hair that it was a boy! I am stickin to my guns but not sure I can hold on 8 months to find out!!

Everyone is catching this flu! I am not going to go out. i am going to stay here in my little cage with a bottle of dettol - squirting anyone who comes in! Last thing i need right now is a bug! Urgh!!

Feel sorry for you tho:( get a bottle of olbus oil and put some in a bowl of hot water in the bathroom, whilst you have a long soak inthe bath. That will help clear you up a bit! Try and get fresh air too, go for a walk, it will help you feel better and make you sleep better too!

Little miss Molly the Dominatrix - there is something not completely unbelieveable about that! lol

Cod...hmmmmmmmmmmm

You'l have to let us know what happens when they go back to school tomorrow! That poor woman.....

x

we wont find anything out untill the weekend. i will inform you as soon as i know poor lady!

i feel so ill it feels like my voice is going, im going to try get into the docs in the morning not that theres alot they can do really just being safe i suppose.

miss mollt dominatrix what are you lot like!

:rofl: thats funny!

But on the note of getting sick...I too have the same cold! Headaches and hot and cold flushes! As well as snotty nose and sore throat! poor me! :cry:

we can be sick buddies together! Im going to hope back into bed and finish reading my book...hopefully DS will behave enough to let me! (YEAH RIGHT!!!!!!)

:flower: :hug: :hug:

i feel much better today, still pretty rubbish though.

im trying to get moved via mk council because we just cant afford to go private, so im on a few housing exchange websites i got an email this morning saying you have received a pm on xxxxwhatever site so i though great logged in and i cant open the pm!

ahhhhh how annoying is that

boo hiss

Hi Molly, I've not been around much lately but wondered how you were doing so had a catch up on you